Never see the baby?

[Dippypippy1980]

This might sound odd, but my next door neighbours had a baby last year - he would be nearly one.

I can hear him crying and I occasionally see the neighbours carrying a baby carrier to the car, but I have never seen them leave the house pushing a pram and all through the summer they were never in the garden with him that I saw.

I chat to them occasionally and understand he is doing well, starting to walk. I know there could be health problems they don’t want to mention - but it’s odd to never see him at all.

We live in new builds with smallish gardens - I garden a lot, and we have been sitting out a lot in the summer. My daughter plays in the garden. We are very quiet, so we aren’t driving them inside. Neither my daughter, boyfriend or I have ever seen them even carrying the baby outside.

None of my business I know - but given the amazing weather we have had all summer it just seems a bit strange.

Really? Not everyone sits in their garden. Get a life.

It's possible they keep different hours to you. It's possible the baby doesn't like being outdoors. It's possible the baby has health issues. All kinds of things are possible; some people aren't the sit outside type. So long as you don't suspect any kind of neglect it's not really an issue.

You know you sound just like my neighbour ( annoying ). She texts me regularly to say how are you ? I haven't seen you out with the baby in this lovely weather . Funnily enough when I get these texts I am often out with the baby walking in the sunshine.As soon as I leave the house they are pouncing on me and sticking their head into the pram no thought as to weather he might be due a nap or whatever they just stimulate him regardless . It's got to a point where I wait a few minutes before leaving the house if I see them. Mind your own business I would say :)

It's not unusual to not sit on the garden with a baby. You can't relax in the garden with a non walking baby anyway not can you garden so I don't think that's odd at all.
Also not taking a pram out is not strange. Some people don't use them much my DD uses a sling most of the time. You've seen them doing to the car and you've heard the baby, I am not sure what you are worried about to be honest

I had a baby at the start of the summer and it rained the first several weeks so could barely take the baby out. Plus I was breastfeeding and she wasn’t doing well so I could barely leave the sofa, let alone the house.

We take walks sometimes but my baby hates the pram and yells in it. So between that and the weather, I have very short windows where I can take her out.

I get out with the baby as much as I can, but it’s really hard work and I’d hate to think my neighbours were judging me on top of everything else!

Ha ha - okay I’m being odd and unreasonable.

Okay - thank you. Nothing to worry about then.

I'm with you op and I think it's a bit strange tbh, when my son was small we'd be put all the time visiting baby groups, going into town, popping to the corner shop. But I realize some people do get over anxious with baby's and would rather not go out.

You sure you aren't my neighbour?

I suffer from PND and I was like this when I first had my baby last year for the first couple of months, the days it was way too hot to bring a baby out during the summer. I do go out with my baby just not often. I find it much easier at home and only go out to play centres as and when and when I know my baby needs fresh air and a walk. Everyone is completely different. I don't think it's a cause for concern. Funny actually I was worried my neighbours were thinking this about me too, but then I realised it really is non of their business and had a plan for when they asked me / that I suffered from piles and struggled to walk that would've shut them up!

Do they spend time in the garden without the baby? Not everyone has the attitude to sunshine, dry weather and gardens that many British people do. My mother, who is from a hot country where sunshine is plentiful, and therefore not viewed as a precious commodity, never steps foot in the garden. She appraises it, and directs gardeners, from inside the house (or sends a message via a minion). Sunshine equals unnecessary skin darkening to her. Perhaps they just aren’t garden people.

I don’t text them at or ask them why they aren’t outside, just occasionally say hello and ask after the baby.

Normal neighbourly small talk.

Just struck me this morning I have never actually laid eyes on the one year old, when my daughter asked if there really was a baby next door😂. Our previous neighbours had a baby and she remembers the baby toddling up the path. she lent the baby her little tikes slide.

But as you have said, I clearly have too much times on hands and and starting chats on ranDom, odd 😆😀 thoughts😂😂😂😂😂

Totally being unreasonable - move on, nothing to see here.

Yeah.

My boyfriend thinks it’s an elaborate hoax and there is no baby. Just occasional recordings of a baby crying.

@Nonnymum

Regarding not being able to relax in the garden with a non walking baby. I think that very much depends on the person.

Where we are the weather has been good enough that we've been spending around 8 hours a day in the garden with our non-walking baby. It's been very relaxing.

Put out a picnic blanket and build some shade and you've got a play area which has plenty of things for your child to see and do. We found that our son sleeps longer and more deeply outside.

We're getting to sit outside and enjoy the fresh air and can still get things done as meals can be prepped outside (peeling & chopping veg), baby changes can be done outside and we tend to feed him outdoors as well.

However, that's what we like and it doesn't have to be the same for everyone.

Maybe they just don’t like going in their garden? Or for walks?
I hope my neighbours don’t watch our comings and goings so intently!

My SIL never really goes out with her children. It’s changed as they’ve got older and have school/classes etc but she never took them to baby classes or for walks etc. Some people just like staying in.

Have you posted about this recently? This is the third similar thread I’ve read in the last fortnight

Haven’t posted before. Just a random thought.

Totally accept I am being unreasonable, thanks for the responses, and the insults😊.

I won’t give it another thought.

Eurgh you sound like my neighbour. I tend to do most of what I need to in the mornings which happens to be when she works. I always get the oh never see you, do you really have a baby. Yes thanks Hun, we go out for several hours everyday, would you like me to send you an itinerary.

I think this is a bit odd. It's good for a child to be outside, whether playing in the garden or in the buggy for a walk to the shops. Where I work there are children with rickets due to lack of vit D from not going outside (exacerbated by many living in flats without outside space). There are always a very small number of children who are kept inside due to abuse. Whilst I am not suggesting this here, as it is highly unlikely, it does happen sadly. I was unable to register my child at the GP without her present, I assume so that she was 'seen'.

If course you can't do anything about this without more concerns. They probably are just not outdoors people and nothing worrying going on. But I don't think it is unreasonable to find it a bit strange.

I think OP @Dippypippy1980 Has made her point that she was thinking out loud (on MN)

What does it have to do with you and why start a thread about a baby that is nothing to do with you. I never saw my neighbours child until he was walking.

Amazing weather? Not in these parts.

Could it be that the DM has health problems that mean she can't take the baby out alone? Therefore baby only goes out when her OH is there?

Might be a reason why you don't see them, esp if he has a job that requires unsociable or varying hours.

I had my baby 3 months ago and I’ve had quite a bit of anxiety about taking her out. It’d make me even more anxious if I knew the neighbours were waiting for me to emerge.