Bit shaken. Aibu to be?

[duchessofsussedsex]

I've just been to Sainsbury's. I was in the fruit aisle and there was a lady and her teenager by the apples I wanted. I waited a while until they were done (they were inspecting each packet for a while) and as they were moving off I reached over and took a packet. I pretty certain I wasn't in their personal space but as I had waited a while I did swoop in a bit.

The woman shouted "stupid bitch" after me and I turned round and said "excuse me" and she incredibly angrily said "you heard". I said "what's your problem" and her teenager proceeded to come and get right up in my face (o could feel spit) and start shouting at me never to speak to her mother like that and that I needed to speak to her. She repeated this at least 10 times and every time I said "I am speaking to you - what exactly is the problem here". The only other thing she said was "ill give you a problem if you don't back off". No other answer at all. I was nothing but polite as it was a busy public place. I the. walked off and she kept shouting "stupid bitch" after me.

I just carried on for a few mins and then I just started shaking and crying and had to abandon the basket and leave. Lots of people witnessed this and nobody said a word.

I'm over 30 years old and I've been reduced to tears by a teenager. I feel so pathetic. I'm just sat in the car crying. I really don't think o did anything wrong. Aibu or are people really this unbelievably nasty and, in the case of everyone else, passive in this day and age and I need to suck it up?

Why say anything? Either have the argument and give as good as you get or ignore! So yes I think yabu a bit.

Bloody hell that sound outrageous ! You need to report them to securty. Ring store from your car now. Don't tolerate their loutish behaviour !

What was I supposed to say when she wouldn't stop repeating "talk to me not my mum"?? I WAS talking to her and asking her what the issue was. How exactly was I supposed to have the argument? Please enlighten me for next time?

That's awful. The behaviour of the mum and her teenager wasn't normal in any way. Not that this would excuse their behaviour, but I wonder if they mistook you for someone else who they'd had an altercation with? They are obviously very angry and unreasonable people. I'm sorry no one intervened, but perhaps they were frightened to.

redhelen These people need to be called out for this bullying behaviour. No way should you ignore it !

I'm sorry they sound unhinged. Call security and let them knoW. You d

YANBU at all! It was a very unpleasant/unexpected experience. Your adrenaline got you through it, standing up for yourself, and now you are left feeling a bit shocked. Your reaction is normal. The teenager clearly has no understanding of what is acceptable behaviour (obviously learned from her lovely mum 🙄)
Take some deep breaths, you will feel calmer soon x

Honestly, you wont be the only one. If she's like this she'll have form for it.
Its very much her problem, not yours, its just a shame you've been exposed to it.

Ups... posted too soon.
You did nothing wrong!

Oh for goodness sake - who would think you were being unreasonable to be upset by this? It wasn’t an argument. OP was being yelled at for no apparent reason and when she tried to find out why she was just yelled at more.

You could go home and try to forget it or go back into the store and talk to security. Talking to security would be the better option in my opinion

This happened to me a few years back and I was 7 months pregnant all I did was walk in between two women with pushchairs they shouted rat at me I said excuse me and they both started shouting at me I just walked off I also cried when I got outside there are some very nasty people out there unfortunately

Not normal behaviour at all. You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time unfortunately. I’d be upset too, not what you need when you’re trying to just get on and buy a few groceries.

Good lord RedHelen do you really condone teenagers (or anyone really) speaking to others like that or being so aggressive? Even had OP accidentally got into their personal space, it wouldn't have excused it.

I cannot believe mum allowed her teenager to talk to OP like that- even if she was annoyed by OP, it was still outrageous.

Errrrm from your description I think you started it!! To be honest I would have said sorry and walked off rather than have a lunatic teen trying to fight me!
I tend to say “sorry, please can I reach passed you to the apples” in situations like this.

Op report them to the store, they will have CCTV footage of the incidence,

They sound batshit crazy, and the teenager sounds absolutely feral to set about you like that, I'm not surprised you was shaken and upset by it, I would be too....op the people who watched as did nothing may have been afraid if they tried to intervene they would have had mum and teenager set about them too,

Some people are utter cunts

They are clearly very unhappy about something . I would assume they have some major issues to behave this way . So whilst it’s completely normal to be shaken I would definitely assume they have some
Major problems

I do feel for you and it’s a good lesson to never engage with people like this. She called you a stupid bitch for no reason at all. Just that should be enough for you to know you’re not going to reach a reasonable resolution with these people. If that sort of thing ever happens again just walk away.

Your fight or flight has been set off. You’ll calm down soon. Try not to take it personally. Some people are just awful.

That's not a "normal" reaction from a teenager (or anyone) OP. I hope you can have a nice cuppa and a biscuit soon and feel a little better.

Some people are just plain rude - I've never understood this particularly aggressive in your face strangers shouting business. Must be of a different breed.

Am stunned this happened at Sainsbury's... Asda I could understand.

Bloodyhell that sounds awful OP

What a bizarre aggressive reaction from them both. Not sure what you could have done differently really.
When we’re subjected to completely out of the blue behaviour from others that’s so alien to our own it’s very difficult to think on the spot. You did very well to keep your cool.

Unmumsnetty hugs to you.

Tbh I hate when people act like you in supermarkets. drives me mad why not just wait your turn?! you probably looked like you was “making a point” of having to wait, god forbid waiting your turn hey?!

OP "started it"? I've heard it all now. So sorry you've been treated like this. I don't know what's happened to people in the last few years. This kind of unhinged behaviour seems to be getting more and more common. I wish I could give you a hug and buy you a coffee, OP. 💐

YANBU, anyone would be shaken up by that. Weren’t there any members of staff around?

YANBU. They were looking for a fight and you were in the wrong place at the wrong time. I would have been upset by this too and I'm well able to defend myself. There a nothing unreasonable about the fact this has upset you.

They sound mad as hatters. What am unpleasant situation.

There's some horrible people around . Sorry you have gone through this. Just try to put it behind you. these aggressive , ignorant people are everywhere and just not worth wasting time over.