Bit shaken. Aibu to be?

[duchessofsussedsex]

I've just been to Sainsbury's. I was in the fruit aisle and there was a lady and her teenager by the apples I wanted. I waited a while until they were done (they were inspecting each packet for a while) and as they were moving off I reached over and took a packet. I pretty certain I wasn't in their personal space but as I had waited a while I did swoop in a bit.

The woman shouted "stupid bitch" after me and I turned round and said "excuse me" and she incredibly angrily said "you heard". I said "what's your problem" and her teenager proceeded to come and get right up in my face (o could feel spit) and start shouting at me never to speak to her mother like that and that I needed to speak to her. She repeated this at least 10 times and every time I said "I am speaking to you - what exactly is the problem here". The only other thing she said was "ill give you a problem if you don't back off". No other answer at all. I was nothing but polite as it was a busy public place. I the. walked off and she kept shouting "stupid bitch" after me.

I just carried on for a few mins and then I just started shaking and crying and had to abandon the basket and leave. Lots of people witnessed this and nobody said a word.

I'm over 30 years old and I've been reduced to tears by a teenager. I feel so pathetic. I'm just sat in the car crying. I really don't think o did anything wrong. Aibu or are people really this unbelievably nasty and, in the case of everyone else, passive in this day and age and I need to suck it up?

Obviously I wouldnt have thought of this at the time, but the correct response to the teenager is "Honey, I speak to the organ grinder, not the monkey." You are not being unreasonable.

Wow, not surprised you were shaken. I've ended up feeling shaken by strangers' big egos and big gobs on many occasions.

That sounds awful. I am not surprised you were shaken. I hope you feel OK now.

I just knew this would be Lewisham before you'd even said it-dont analyse what you did or didnt do, they are the sort of people who do this daily to anyone they think they can get the better of.

YANBU. Goodness, what a horrible experience. Have a word with the store manager/security as what they did coukd be classed as verbal assault. The pair may even be well known for creating a scene. Do hope you have managed to calm down putting them in the "horrible people" box.

Cannot believe the response on this thread! Who knew saying excuse me was akin to inviting an ill mannered teenager to shout in your face, which is perfectly acceptable in Lewisham don'tcha know. Batshit.

YWDNBU they just sound like terrible gobshites. Also what is it with people now that absolutely everything is 'passive aggressive'. What happened to behaviour that's just passive? ( i.e. quietly waiting for the scumbag apple inspectors to finish)

This is the kind of thing that would leave me a shaky mess too.

They sound like they were just looking for an argument. DH and I had one like this in the street; he said "Excuse me" to go by with the pushchair and she moved, then said he "could have said excuse me", so he said he did, so she got louder... 3 times we thought we got her to calm down and she started again, so we just walked off with her shouting at us. It's very upsetting when someone shouts at you and you try to be rational so you think maybe you did something wrong. You didn't, they're just crazy. Haven't RTFT, but I hope you do report it to the store security.

Not your fault op and those who are saying you are to blame 😲wtf? Really, when did verbal assualt and threatening behaviour become an acceptable response to picking up some food? Please report. Some people have a strange view on how to behave or interact with others. I hope you are ok now.

I’d have taken great delight in laughing in her face 😂 nothing funnier than watching a pissed off person unable to piss me off however as you really seem to dislike confrontation it would probably have been better not to intitally respond with the excuse me . You don’t strike me as someone who wanted the ensuing argument an ‘excuse me ‘ in that tone tends to generate . Not your fault but people like that absolutly will start for any tiny thing .

Op I’m so sorry you’re shaken. Unfortunately scum like this are everywhere these days! I once asked a couple of guys who happened to be black to excuse me when they were blocking the salad cart in Sainsbury’s got called a racist cunt!

Hey OP, This sadly happens , too often I suppose . They are low lifes and are nothing to you x . So don’t waste another moment thinking about them . What is is it about supermarkets ? I too had an incident where a woman looked at me then to my baby at the till and shouted at me that ...... ‘ I should drop the little b+g on his head and get myself a man’. Was she worth my time and energy ? NO !!! Smile and look up and say to yourself ‘thank god you they are not part of your world’ . Don’t waste another moment thinking about them .

They sound unbelievably awful. Perhaps they were trying to distract you in order to pick your pocket/bag? Maybe they didn`t succeed this time...I would definitely ask to speak to store security/manager.

You poor thing, of course you're shaken. That was really scary. I wouldn't follow it up because there's no action that can really be taken and it will keep it fresh when you actually need to put it behind you. With anger issues like that, that teen is going to end up in jail.

Absolute assholes. Take some deep breaths and drink some wine and find some kind, fun people to be around. X

There are some posters on here who deliberately come on to be contrary and provocative. Are you one of those, Creeper? . ....Right?? Creeper even said "nobody else got involved"... yeah, because nobody else got called a stupid bitch!

I wanted to make a joke saying "This is why you should shop in Waitrose", so I did a quick search thinking there's no way someone else hasn't made that joke already. Turns out they haven't, but one person did say it seriously 😅

Fight or flight response- you did the right thing by starting to fight then clearing off- who knows what they were possibly on, stuff happening in their lives- just avoid - it’s not you and you did nothing wrong but by removing yourself from the situation you never have to deal with them again hopefully. An outburst like that takes you by surprise as on your radar it’s completely unexpected and has no rationale.try to think no more of it except had you stayed it may have escalated badly. Deep breath, well done

They sound like they were on drugs. I wouldn't have spoken to them at all and would probably have ran from them tbh. However, I am aware that the more people run away from them, they stroppier they believe they can be to the next person. However, with people like that there is simply no point in doing anything other than run away!

That would upset me too. You had every right to say excuse me. You were probably surprised and shocked initially that she said that and that's why you responded. And so you should, why do assholes get the power. Awful behaviour because some people just cannot exercise self control. The other day I heard a guy call an old man a stupid dumb old fucking cunt because he had to wait turn the corner in his car while the man crossed the road. Absolutely appalling.

Oh and I used to live in Lewisham and go to that Sainsbury's weekly, I am unsurprised... Same, some families around there are basically feral. They could start a fight with a lamp post. You did nothing wrong, they have massive issues (and realistically there is probably substance abuse and/or mental illness involved, in both parent and child).

Obviously I wouldnt have thought of this at the time, but the correct response to the teenager is "Honey, I speak to the organ grinder, not the monkey."

This made me laugh but I think it op had said it, given what pp are inferring about Lewisham, may have kicked things off a bit!!

YANBU. People like that are why snobbery is a go-to state of mind. Unspeakable behaviour!

@duchessofsussedsex you are not being U. They sound like a couple of Neanderthals. In some ways I feel sorry for them. They obviously have the brain capacity of a banana.