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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU re Karen Matthews after watching the programme tonight>

193 replies

tiptoeingpixie · 06/04/2017 23:14

Before I say anything, I absolutely think what she did was disgusting, abhorrent and alien to me as a mother how she could do what she did.

After watching programme tonight I've changed my mine in that no, she wasn't evil like some have claimed, she was someone with low intellect, numerous children by various fathers, the stereotype benefit mother that the press love to villi file.

Interested in what other's who saw the programme thought x

OP posts:
Astro55 · 06/04/2017 23:15

I've not watched it - but it was well documented at the time about her low intelligence - poor kids

beachbodyunready · 06/04/2017 23:17

What programme? I would've watched if I'd known.

NotStoppedAllDay · 06/04/2017 23:19

I also have a thread in chat

But actually, she drugged her child for months. Shannon refused to go back to her mother

She's not evil? Just a bit unintelligent?Hmm

UnconventionalWarfare · 06/04/2017 23:20

She's a fucking evil cunt who should still be behind bars YABU

Original poster
tiptoeingpixie · 06/04/2017 23:22
OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 06/04/2017 23:22

Of course she was bloody evil and selfish too, beyond belief.

That has nothing to do with the press vilifying her.

Original poster
tiptoeingpixie · 06/04/2017 23:23

eeek sorry wrong link!!!

www.mirror.co.uk/tv/tv-news/trailer-shannon-matthews-mothers-story-10166235

OP posts:
DexysRunnerMidnight · 06/04/2017 23:25

There is something in your post which suggests that women with low intellect and children by different fathers could, through their circumstances, fall into the trap of abusing their children.

It makes me uneasy.

Original poster
tiptoeingpixie · 06/04/2017 23:29

Evil though? like a serial killer such as Ian Brady or the yorkshire ripper??

Or what we see day in day out with people who pop out numerous kids day in day out, drink every nite with their mates and smoke fags ffs

she's obviously a bad mother - her house was the local 'benefit scum' congragating round her house most nights.

Evil though? Disagree

OP posts:
Original poster
tiptoeingpixie · 06/04/2017 23:30

DexysRunnerMidnight Thu 06-Apr-17 23:25:00
There is something in your post which suggests that women with low intellect and children by different fathers could, through their circumstances, fall into the trap of abusing their children.

It makes me uneasy

I'm sorry it makes you feel uneasy - look up facts :)

OP posts:
Original poster
tiptoeingpixie · 06/04/2017 23:31

that is abuse by proxy not the parent before you twist

OP posts:
ghostspirit · 06/04/2017 23:33

I do kind of feel bad for her. There was a professional I forget who. Who said she could see something was not right and felt she was one to keep an eye on. It seemed she was easy lead. How comes we don't hear about the man.Karen Matthews boyfriend uncle? Who actually had Shannon. I do believe she was funerable. And her life is fucked I'm surprised she has Kept her new id secret so far. Her kids have been through hell and are probably reminded everyday. I really hope they have a good life now

UnconventionalWarfare · 06/04/2017 23:33
Biscuit
ZilphasHatpin · 06/04/2017 23:35

she wasn't evil like some have claimed,

Well of course she wasn't because there is no such thing as evil. There are reasons for every single human behaviour, none of those reasons are due to "evil". What she did was choose to abuse and neglect her children. One of them to a much more horrific extent than the others. Her intellect, upbringing, relationships, will have all had bearing on the decisions she made to do that. Just like all of us make decisions based on those same things. Most of us don't choose to abuse children.

DexysRunnerMidnight · 06/04/2017 23:35

Do you mean facts about less intelligent women who have children to different fathers abusing their children? Can you point me to what you have in mind?

In any event i would disagree that drugging your child and offering them up for captivity does not constitute abuse in its own right.

But anyway, in seriousness, what do you mean by 'facts'?

ZilphasHatpin · 06/04/2017 23:36

Evil though? like a serial killer such as Ian Brady or the yorkshire ripper??

Neither of those were evil either. All human.

WorraLiberty · 06/04/2017 23:37

If you think drugging your child for months and hiding her in a draw, is not the actions of an evil person, I absolutely despair.

'Popping out kids'?

'Local benefit scum'?

Are you for actual real? Hmm

LagunaBubbles · 06/04/2017 23:41

There's always someone willing to excuse abuse just because it's a woman isn't there?

Original poster
tiptoeingpixie · 06/04/2017 23:44

I'm for real yes :)

Those descriptions aren't my opinion - before you roll your eyes I thought that was obvious ergo what my OP is about :)

Please re-read - You think she's evil, I don't. I absolutely don't think she's akin to the likes of myra hindley etc. What I do think is she was an easily led, low intellect parent that most on MN spout out about women who don't work and and have numerous kids with numerous fathers.

Yes, I'm for real rolls eyes back again xx

OP posts:
Gingernaut · 06/04/2017 23:45

Even stupid people can tell right from wrong.

If she was simply easily led, she had loads of chances to come clean to the police about where Shannon was.

She must have been interviewed alone at some point and could have said then what had happened, but she stuck to the story.

That she thought or had been convinced by another that they could get away with it suggests stupidity.

The fact she agreed to go along with it without a thought for her child's safety and wellbeing suggests a stone cold cow.

Original poster
tiptoeingpixie · 06/04/2017 23:46

Can I just reiterate - I am NOT saying what she did was right - it was very wrong!!! I'm questioning the 'evil' tag etc.

OP posts:
ghostspirit · 06/04/2017 23:47

I.forgot about the drugging. And how long if was for.

FeralBeryl · 06/04/2017 23:51

Ghost it was for months apparently Shock

OP I kind of understand what you mean after that programme, it was actually quite non biased, I agree that she was of extremely low intellect, easily led etc.
But
She categorically was able to tell the difference between right and wrong. What she did was wrong, therefore I'm inclined to agree with the evil side rather than misled side.
Very tragic tale for everyone involved. I hope her kids have been able to move forward.

Is anyone watching the hideously sad programme after it about the murder of the 14 year old boy?

Megatherium · 06/04/2017 23:58

I think it's distinctly possible that her low intelligence meant that she simply didn't think through the consequences of what she did on her daughter, and just thought it was a harmless way to make money. The fact that realistically the plan could never have succeeded shows how dim she was. If she had fully appreciated and understood how her daughter would be harmed but decided to go ahead anyway because she just didn't care, then yes, she would be evil - but I really doubt that that is the case.

ghostspirit · 06/04/2017 23:59

I wonder why she won't say who the 3rd person is