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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think it you work from home you can still help out?!

218 replies

MusicalChairsOh · 11/01/2017 15:20

Dh worked from home today. (First day he has when ive not been at home with the dc) I went to work, took both dc to nursery which made me late as he was going to do it but sprung it on me 5 minutes before we all had to leave that he had to wash his hair before taking them so I just took them instead.

I've come home and all curtains are still closed, lights are on and everything is exactly the same as how I left this morning.

I'm now running about picking things up from the morning rush and sorting things out.

Aibu to think yes you are technically working but you could still help out even out of basic courtesy?!

OP posts:

Believeitornot · 11/01/2017 15:21

Yanbu

And he had to wash his hair?! If he's at home he could have washed it after dropping them off.

You should tell him you're unhappy about it asap.

LittleBoat · 11/01/2017 15:25

Yabu except about the hair washing. If he had gone to work no one would have been there to draw curtains etc.

Presumably he was working 9-6. However, once he has stopped working he should chip in as usual and maybe a bit more depending how much time he saved on not travelling to and from work.

qwertyuiopasdfghjkl · 11/01/2017 15:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Katy07 · 11/01/2017 15:28

Surely he'd prefer to have curtains open when he's working from home? Does he seriously sit at a pc ALL day long & never move? It's not rocket science to open a curtain or do a little job when you get up to make a cuppa...

Wolfiefan · 11/01/2017 15:30

Depends what you mean by helping out? Unloading the dishwasher whilst waiting for the kettle to boil? Fine.
Taking in a parcel? Fine.
But tidying up and such when he should be working. I wouldn't expect that.

AmeliaJack · 11/01/2017 15:31

I work from home regularly. I run the dishwasher and usually do several loads of washing.

I generally organise the online shop to come at lunchtime too.

I'm a bit surprised he spent all day in a dark house. But I'm fairly astonished he needed to wash his hair for the school run. I'd take the piss for years about that I think.

BigSandyBalls2015 · 11/01/2017 15:32

One of the 'perks' of working from home is that you're still able to muck in a bit at home ..... put a wash on, empty the dishwasher, make beds, run the hoover over. none of this takes very long and if he's not having to commute then it is very easily done. It'd piss me off (I work from home a lot).

Unless his working at home involves being on the phone all day?

BarbaraofSeville · 11/01/2017 15:34

I'm sure his employer will be totally fine doing all that Sandy while he is working from home .

fishonabicycle · 11/01/2017 15:34

That is totally ridiculous. Whenever I, or anyone else I know, work from home, we all do various jobs - stick a load of washing on, quick tidy while you wait for kettle to boil etc. He's being a twat

PhilODox · 11/01/2017 15:35

Working is working, and presumably paid for by his employer? He wouldn't have got anything done if he had been out of the house all day working either, would he?

Niloufes · 11/01/2017 15:36

Working from home doesn't necessarily mean do all the house hold chores too tbh. Open the curtains and tidy a little whilst making a cup of tea but anything else, no, not really.

ExplodedCloud · 11/01/2017 15:36

I work from home a lot too and I wouldn't dream of doing the hoovering, sorting washing or making beds on work's time!

BitOutOfPractice · 11/01/2017 15:42

I work (for myself) from home and usually do stuff like dishwasher, wipe surfaces, tidy as I go from one room to another etc.

I certainly would expect him to open the curtains and put breakfast stuff in the dishwasher.

I bet if he were at work he would not be working every single minute. He's bound to make a coffee, pop out for a sandwich, chat to a colleague etc.

OneWithTheForce · 11/01/2017 15:46

The mistake you're making is thinking of it as "helping out" rather than just "sorting out his home on a daily basis"

PebbleInTheMoonlight · 11/01/2017 15:47

YABU working from home means you're not free to do other stuff.

I rarely even make a cuppa when I work from home (lunch is unheard of) and often work with curtains closed.

I'm often more productive at home than the office exactly because there are no distractions.

My husband thinks I should do tidying up too but as I sweetly pointed out I don't get a very decent wage and excellent work flexibility because I flit off and feed the washing machine when I'm meant to be working!

Coralfish · 11/01/2017 15:47

But when you are in the office you are not usually working all the time. You are legally entitled to a lunch break of at least 20 mins. And you get up to make coffee, have a chat to collegues - the time not doing this would be enough to open the curtains/put a wash on/ pick up some things. Probably not time to hoover/ do a proper tidy/ deep clean the bathroom in my opinion, so YABU if you are expecting him to do this but he is definitely being unreasonable not opening the curtains and having the lights on all day. Think of the electricity bill!!

Katy07 · 11/01/2017 15:47

I certainly wouldn't expect any big jobs to be done - like others have said he's at home to work. But sticking washing in while the kettle is boiling is no different to having a gossip at work while the kettle is boiling (might even be quicker!).

PossumInAPearTree · 11/01/2017 15:47

Dh worked from home for years and never did any housework while working. He's not lazy and to be honest does more housework than me, he just did it in the evenings and weekends. He always said he was getting paid to work and couldn't in good conscience not be doing what he's getting paid for.

AmeliaJack · 11/01/2017 15:48

I have a daily commute that take over three hours. When I work from home I log on at the time I usually leave home (7am) I nip out to do the school run for ten minutes at 8:45am and 3pm and then carry on working until 6pm.

My employers are getting an 11 hour day from me. I don't stop for lunch. Taking 5 minutes to load the washer/dryer or 20 minutes to put away an online shop still leaves me under the hour lunch break I'm entitled to.

I work about 60 a week minimum, a third of which I'm not paid for so I'm quite comfortable with how I structure my WFH days.

BellyBean · 11/01/2017 15:49

The difference with wfh is there's no commute. So that time can be spent doing jobs, and at lunch too. DH usually does pick up and drop off on wfh days, and has usually put a load in or done the dishes at lunch.

DailyFail1 · 11/01/2017 15:50

I work from home and take dc to school. That's why I do it. But I still start at 8. Housework depends on my schedule - sometimes I'll have time to load the dishwasher or washing machine/do a bit of tidying. Other times I won't even be able to comb my hair. Work from home means that you must prioritize work activities over other things.

JennyOnAPlate · 11/01/2017 15:51

I work from home and do a fair bit. It only takes a minute to put some washing in the washing machine and stack the breakfast dishes in the dishwasher. I've hoovered downstairs today and put bleach down the toilets.

Rubbish if him to not even have opened the curtains!

Jokeaboutmyhotchoc · 11/01/2017 15:53

I work from home and do loads of chores. My work don't care, they expect it. If I can't get my work done in my work hours which is rare I simply log on in the evening to catch up a bit.

Hate jobsworths.

Original poster

MusicalChairsOh · 11/01/2017 15:53

It literally takes the piss.
He's that busy he's come down to have a shower whilst I was sorting laundry. He's left the towels on the floor and the blinds back down. Seriously.

OP posts:

whattodowiththepoo · 11/01/2017 15:55

We don't encourage people to work from home anymore because of spouses and other family members expecting them to stop working to help around the house.

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