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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what wedding mistakes you made....

228 replies

ILiveForNachos · 23/10/2016 16:26

With the kitchen and bathroom threads it made me think of the the things people wouldn't do if they got married again (or things they would do if they had the chance again)......

OP posts:
YouTheCat · 23/10/2016 16:28

Getting married to who I did was a massive mistake.

dotdotdotmustdash · 23/10/2016 16:28

I would remember to arrange transport for myself and new Dh to get to the restaurant after the photo session. It was a long walk and my shoes killed my feet.

NameOfUser · 23/10/2016 16:29

Let other people's expectations take over my day.
I didn't want a shit down meal, I had one.
I didn't want a big dress, I had one.
I didn't want any more than immediate family, there were over a hundred guests.

If I did it again, I'd run away to Vegas.

NameOfUser · 23/10/2016 16:29

A sit down meal. Blush

maldini · 23/10/2016 16:29

Not passing around the guestbook at the wedding breakfast - it's mostly empty

Tliev · 23/10/2016 16:31

I wouldn't worry so much about it in the run up.

I wouldn't get blind drunk at the reception.

I would also run away to Vegas 😂 I wanted to do that initially anyway being the introvert that I am but family were not happy.

TopKittyKat · 23/10/2016 16:31

We got married abroad. It was the most perfect day with just immediate family (parents, siblings and best man).
We got bullied into having a party at home because some family were put out we weren't having a big white wedding. I hated the party (don't like being the centre of attention) and was a big additional expense, I wish we had stuck to our guns and just find the marriage abroad!
So, the mistake was being pressurised to do something just to keep others happy.

maldini · 23/10/2016 16:32

Oh and to not write a list with specific names for the photos rather than saying 'family' - my grandparents took over and decided that people who weren't my close family were to be included in the pictures I had paid for. It was very awkward telling the family members that effectively they weren't important enough to me to be in the photos (I didn't say that but that's how it came across I imagine) when I could have avoided it by writing specific names.

Bubbles1986 · 23/10/2016 16:32

I wouldn't have let my mum stress so much about the day therefore stressing me out by association

I would have made sure my dress was done up properly

I would have let dh wear shoes he was comfortable in

I wouldn't have allowed dh to hold something sharp when drunk

I wouldn't have consummated till the following morning

Still an amazing day though and I ended it forever tied to the love of my life so worth it

TathitiPete · 23/10/2016 16:33

Cat beat me to it Sad

MadHattersWineParty · 23/10/2016 16:33

Has anyone not spent lots of money on a good photographer and regretted it afterwards?

It seems such a big outlay and I always wonder if I'll find it intrusive someone just snapping away the whole day, but I'm not that photogenic so I always wonder if I'll kick myself if all I have are amateur shots and grainy phone pictures.

TheChineseChicken · 23/10/2016 16:33

Not mistakes as such but I wish I hadn't bothered with a cake or flowers for the wedding ceremony venue. I didn't notice either (ran out of time for cake cutting). Could have saved a few hundred pounds

T0ldmywrath · 23/10/2016 16:35

I wish I'd employed a proper photographer, rather than a family member who had a good camera. Probably not so much a problem these days with digital.

I never had a book for guests to write in & I have only just realised from reading this thread! how lovely that would have been.

AddictedtoGreys · 23/10/2016 16:35

I wish I took more time choosing a photographer that took the kind of photos I wanted instead of just a standard wedding photographer.

Samatamfabahaba · 23/10/2016 16:36

My list would be so long it's hilarious, so I'd just say

CaveMum · 23/10/2016 16:36

We served our wedding cake as dessert (chocolate cake served with chocolate sauce, we cut it after the starter so that the kitchen could plate it up while guests ate their main course) so that saved on "wasting" a cake.

Mortgagedilemma · 23/10/2016 16:36

Too many photographs. I wanted more time to relax, chat to my guests and sip champagne.

Kel1234 · 23/10/2016 16:36

My hairdresser didn't turn up on the day. I was gutted as I'd planned a half up curled style. With less than 15 minutes until I had to leave, my best friend and bridesmaid done her best 'quick fix'. I ended up having my hair straight, and my friend pinned up the top as best she could so I could put my veil on.
And one of my roses fell out my bouquet. I had a shower style bouquet of all red roses, and the same but slightly smaller of pink roses for my bridesmaid. One of my roses fell out and wouldn't stay in.
That's all that went wrong for me on my wedding day. No big deal really

T0ldmywrath · 23/10/2016 16:37

OP kindly provide a link to the kitchen & bathroom threads if possible as I am thinking of getting new of both in the next few years. (lived here 15 plus years & still have the previous owners' choices)

NameOfUser · 23/10/2016 16:38

My guestbook is filled with drawings of penises on EVERY page, courtesy of my delightful sil Hmm

Samatamfabahaba · 23/10/2016 16:38

Oops... stupid phone...

I'd say I wish I'd not done it in the first place. I was (am) so soft I let my in laws take over completely and now I actually don't like thinking about my wedding day. How very sad is that!? I'm off to Vegas or a beach somewhere with minimum people and maximum enjoyment next time.

AddictedtoGreys · 23/10/2016 16:41

nameofuser mine too!!

Also remembered another one, not a mistake as such as I loved my wedding dress, but I wouldn't get one so heavy as by mid evening all I wanted to do was take it off.

buttercup15 · 23/10/2016 16:43

Things I do regret: 1. not buying shoes until 2 days before. Couldn't find any I liked, kept putting it off. 2. Not forcing DH to try his suit on again until 4 days before the wedding, found it didn't fit anymore. 3. Having high expectations of myself suddenly becoming a crafting goddess and thinking it would be fun to do loads of things myself e.g. table plans, decorations, etc despite having never had any interest in crafts previously 4. Having my cousin do my hair and make-up. It was cheap but she did a crap job but I was too embarrassed to say much as she's family. If I'd been paying properly I wouldn't have been afraid to say I don't like it, do it again (I did ask her to change a few things but she got all huffy and it was really awkward and stressful).

Things I don't regret: 1. Having an eBay dress. It cost £300 so I didn't cry when someone spilt beer on it. If I had spent a lot I think it would have really upset me. 2. Not getting pissed. 3. Not spending loads of money on flowers. A waste of money IMO.

Bantanddec · 23/10/2016 16:44

Don't discuss menu choices with the mil! She phoned the hotel and changed the menu for the sit down meal!

winkywinkola · 23/10/2016 16:45

Too many people I didn't know there.

Wish I'd kept it small and personal. And cheap.

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