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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I nearly killed myself today

476 replies

PepsiTwirl · 25/08/2014 23:48

Really sorry but put here for traffic.

I put it in mental health a couple of hours ago but noone responded.

I was going to kill myself , but just as I was about to take tablets, my partner walked in.

DP knows I'm having a hard time, but not this hard.

We spoke for abit, and cried together. DP now asleep and need to talk

(I added a symbol to a random thread to make sure name change had worked)

OP posts:
starshaker · 25/08/2014 23:50

What caused things to get to this point? I've been there, its an awful place to be. Pleased you found a reason to stay

wanderingcloud · 25/08/2014 23:51

So sorry to read this. Get the number for the Samaritans. They are fantastic and will just allow you to talk. Make an appointment with your GP tomorrow to discuss where to go from here.

JennySense · 25/08/2014 23:52

Please get to your GP tomorrow. It doesn't have to be this way, you can get well again. Much love xxx

Original poster
PepsiTwirl · 25/08/2014 23:52

To be honest I didn't find a reason to stay, it's just DP walked in on me.

I really want to do something right now, but I just don't know what and how.

My head is not in a good place

OP posts:
LadyLuck10 · 25/08/2014 23:55

Here's a hug op.

Purplepoodle · 25/08/2014 23:56

Phone the out of hours doctors now. Explain the situation

Namechngedforthis · 25/08/2014 23:58

Hey OP, go in and look at your DP sleeping and ask yourself if he could bear to lose you. If you have children go into their rooms and do the same. Sit down, make a list of all the things you have to be happy and thankful for. If you still can't see any other way out wake your partner, talk to him and please get some urgent medical help. Flowers

Original poster
PepsiTwirl · 25/08/2014 23:58

What will they do? Will they section me? I'm not going to hospital

OP posts:
Stopanuary · 25/08/2014 23:59

Samaritans number is 08457 909090

Spartak · 25/08/2014 23:59

How far is your nearest hospital? Can you get there and go to A&E?

Septbaby · 26/08/2014 00:00

Please call the Samaritans, the number is 08457 90 90 90. They are simply there to talk to, it may just be the thing you need, there is no judgment, just someone to talk to xxx

Original poster
PepsiTwirl · 26/08/2014 00:01

Can A&E do anything?

I'm scared how it feels so clear that I am going to do something, kind of a calm feeling. A very weird feeling.

OP posts:
scousadelic · 26/08/2014 00:02

A couple of years ago someone I care a lot about found the strength to ring me rather than end things. I am so glad that he found that strength and now he has come through it, so is he. This seems like a reasonable solution now but, trust me, it really isn't, you just can't see that at the moment.

Please go to the doctors tomorrow and wake your partner if you feel yourself wavering

MyPrettyToes · 26/08/2014 00:02

The fact that you are writing here is a very very good thing Pepsi. Wake your DP and talk or ring the Samaritans.

Spartak · 26/08/2014 00:03

Are you in England? Call 111 if you are. Its the replacement for nhs direct. They have been fab the few times I have called them. They will be able to advise you where best to go.

Septbaby · 26/08/2014 00:03

Talk to someone pepsi, just talk to them, as long as you need to, please call the Samaritans, you can go to a&e if you feel you want to, wake your DP, just please talk to someone xxx

Original poster
PepsiTwirl · 26/08/2014 00:04

I'm in London.
I'm scared to phone anyone. I don't know what to say. What will they do? I don't want anyone knowing about this, especially not my family

OP posts:
Original poster
PepsiTwirl · 26/08/2014 00:05

My partner is the only one who knows I am like this

OP posts:
PhilomenaCunk · 26/08/2014 00:05

Please call the Samaritans. They are tremendous.

NCforAye · 26/08/2014 00:06

Phone the Samaritans, please.

You as an individual are of value and importance. The world would be a poorer place without you.

Spartak · 26/08/2014 00:06

Just tell them what you posted here. Read it out if its easier that way. They will talk to you and tell you the best way to get help.

Septbaby · 26/08/2014 00:07

You don't need to tell anyone, Samaritans is anonymous if you want it to be, just tell them exactly what you've written here, that's all, they are amazing

PhilomenaCunk · 26/08/2014 00:07

You don't have to say anything. They'll give you time.

PhilomenaCunk · 26/08/2014 00:08

By that I mean that even if you call and can't be eloquent or just need to cry they will listen.

Fishstix · 26/08/2014 00:08

Would it help if you could offload here? We are none of us MH experts or trained in any way but often it's hard to be totally honest with people in RL and just being able to say 'things are like this and I can't stand it any more' actually does help you carry it for another day. Another day could be all you need. One step, and then the next, that's what you need to focus on. Just get through today and worry about tomorrow when it comes.
My BF tried to end things about a decade ago. She said just promising herself one extra day get through, every day, is what saved her. Having to look at the whole picture was too much.
You are not alone on here. We may not have the answers but we can listen.

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