Day 1 for anyone just starting out

[Justdonthavethefirstone]

Hi all. This is my day 1. I have joined some other threads for support but thought I would start a new one for anyone just starting out on this journey. I have a drink problem. It got worse over lockdown.i have had day 1 before and failed but this time I am starting off prepared. I have books to read. I have joined Mumsnet for support and have told my family and friends.

I saw that "this works" stuff in M&S as well @hazelnutmochi but it was £27.50. The 'sleep' stuff was £6.50 so that won me over! However it doesn't really work so maybe was a false economy!

Not done the tunnel or office USA or 30 rock so will start making a list! Will add Power and Unorthodox. Seen Marcella yes. And the Fall and Sinner too. We've just finished Des which has David tennant in it and was good. Just started "Us" which is easy watching and reasonable so far. Glad we're all agreed LOD is the best. AS YOU WERE FELLA.

I feel for you guys that have unhelpful husbands. My ex h was fucking useless so I know how irritating and unfair it is when you're shouldering all the physical and mental load of running the home and children. I'm lucky my h is great and does his share, it's so much nicer. Sorry if a bit boasty, it makes me so cross to hear about lazy arse husbands that don't do their bit. I'm not surprised you were angry and ranty @Ynwa1234 we're always here to moan at. Laughed out loud at your daddy pig comparison 😂 Peppa used to crack me up, the show was one big excuse to have a pop at fat lazy dim daddy pig 😭

Even bloody worse when they're under your feet and won't sod off to work!

@OrchidJewel ive found the same when I've told quite a few friends I'm having a break, quite a few have said they've been trying to cut down or they want to do dry October and stuff too. It's nice to know we're not alone.

I'm 100% jel of your fresh faced ness @OrchidJewel and of your weight loss @hazelnutmochi
I swear to god I look worse than ever. I feel flabby and disgusting and my skin is ancient. It's this fecking menopause I tell you. Not happy. I really want to look nice 😢

I had no idea that this works stuff was so expensive! DH got it for me one Christmas.
When I've had trouble sleeping the thing that's worked 9 times out of 10 is putting an audio book on (there's a sleep timer setting) I choose something non fiction.

I'm the same with jeans @Ynwa1234, I've got rid of some recently which I've got no hope of getting into. I want to get a bit below what I weighed before lockdown and tone up/get fitter. Also have too many clothes, i love shopping! All online now though. I hope your ankle is OK.

I'm sure you look lovely @writingsonthewall, you sound lovely, you all do!

I'm a SAHM so do most of the house stuff here, though DH definitely pulls his weight. We have a cleaner though, i hate cleaning. When she couldn't visit over lockdown DH did most of it.

I need Marie kondo too @Ynwa1234 I seem to spend half my life decluttering and yet the house is always full of clutter, go figure. I buy the odd item of new clothes but am sure I Chuck out 3x more and still my drawers won't close half the time. I wear the same old shit every day anyway.

You're right I do exercise like a bastard and it doesn't seem to do anything. Today I ran 5k at 7am, got back, walked ds to school then walked home (about 1.5 miles total), then went to hot yoga (I've had a day annual leave). Then later walked to collect ds. HOWEVER, I have also picked at crap food all day. I'm good in the morning, then in the afternoon I just want crap. Need to sort that out. I'm not overweight but my body has changed as I've got older and I don't like it. My arms are the worst they have lost all time and definition. I don't dare lift them up in public if I've got a short sleeve top on as scared I might knock a few people out. They're so gross, they make me really sad. All crepey and old lady like 😩

Glad your h does help out sometimes. Don't get me wrong, mine isn't perfect and some times he does let me deal with more stuff but compared to the last one he's a dream. I used to have a cleaner but paid her for 4 months lockdown without her coming and she never got in touch to say she would come back when things started lifting so I canned it. Don't feel too guilty as like I say I did pay for 4 months in full. Now I just do it myself. Save £25 a week but of course I don't feel in the slightest bit richer, it just goes into the big money pit.

@hazelnutmochi audio books do make me sleepy but it's not getting to sleep at night I have a problem with, I'm pretty good at that! It's waking at 3 or 4 and not being able to get back. Would feel a bit weird putting an audio book on at that time but maybe I should try it.

How is everyone else anyway. @joysmoy hope things are ok? @Rupertpenrysmistress hope work not too hellish?
@OrchidJewel you ok?

@Newernewist are you ok?
@AutumnAlready come back!
@everybody where did you gooooooooooo?

Hi all I'm doing ok and am still around but haven't had much time for mumsnetting. Well done hazelnut on the weight loss!

Ynwa I must have the same wardrobe as you, so many lovely skinny jeans I keep promising myself I will fit into. I really need to sort my diet and exercise out, to be far I have been really ill this week my ds had to have a covid swab (negative) I knew it was a cold but school insisted. I caught the flipping cold and it floored me luckily it was my days off 🙄. I told my DH I need to start drinking again as I don't normally get so Ill with a cold or I could ya know just improve my diet.

Writing I am so envious of your energy and exercise I really wished I could get the enthusiasm to so something, anything would do! I used to love running and it did so much for my mental health. Your description of your arms cracked me up, that's the only thing I actually do, I lift weights to exercise my arms - go figure.

Hi joy* you hanging in there? Hope things are feeling a bit easier for you.

There's some little weights in the garage. Not v heavy though; is that ok? What do I do with them?!

Thanks Rupert things are getting a bit better. Gonna take a while though. You are all doing absolutely amazing

Jesus that looks exhausting @Ynwa1234 how many times a week do you think I should do that? Every day???

Oh that's hard @Ynwa1234 I hold my hands up to any of you who are living with drinkers. I think I would have caved by now if h had been drinking. He's still off it with me although he was on about M&S snow globe Christmas gin today so he's not planning on it long term.

I need you to tell me exactly what exercises to do with my arms for how long and how frequently!

Oh also, I've just started listening to "Glorious rock bottom" on audible and it's brilliant

Morning everyone, would yous stop talking about exercise lol, putting me to shame. It's one addiction I wish I had.

All good and sober here still. Writing can i see your arms I'm sure they are grand. Fuck that you seem to do a ton of exercise, it must be amazing for your mood.

DH has turned a slight corner. I had brief words last night, the 4 year old is commenting 'no daddy is in his office he wont want to do that'. Anyway he peeled himself away and joined in. I dont want to be married to Mr Havisham.

I drop 3 kids to school, son no.2 gets picked up by a bus. Then they all get picked up by creche and stay there till i leave office at 5. This time 2 years ago I had 3 different drops in the morning. Then 4 different picks ups as I was only working 3 days so 2 days that's what I did. Son with SN was on short day, he is in special.school now, game changer for us and him. It was a nightmare but that's all.over now thank god.

I'm loving all your news and will catch up properly later. We are doing great

Hope your doing ok joysmoy, thinking of you

Glad your H joined in @OrchidJewel let's hope he carries on doing that! When the children say stuff like that it is kinda heart breaking.

God that many drop offs sounds horrendous, must have taken forever. My older 2 are at 1 school and younger one at another but the olders walk themselves so it's just littlie I have to take. Now I'm wfh I mostly walk him but maybe not today as it's tipping down.

My exercise is a double edged sword. Because i do it so much, now if i have a day off I feel like a massive failure and hate myself. Also I eat loads which entirely defeats the object. Pretty sure I'd be better off not exercising and eating less. It is good for mental health though I suppose.

Not sure how to post pics. Let me try and post my nails and if it works I'll do my arms later

Ooh it worked. Second go with home gel nail kit was more successful. They're dark blue

Yeah quite pleased with the nails this time. They're not as nice as the nail bar does them but then they didn't cost £25. Well, the stuff cost but you know what I mean. I do feel guilty about the nail bar though, I've only been in once since lockdown for a file and polish and they said their business is so quiet.

I'm sitting in Starbucks with my daughters doing homework. They focus much better if I bring them here and shout them a frappacino! And it makes me sit with them and guide them too. Plus I love coffee.

Cannot recommend Glorious rock bottom enough, it's cringe and funny and a little close to home. Would def recommend listening to it rather than reading it. If you haven't got audible then you get your first book free.

I'll photo my arms later if I remember. Hope nobody is sick at the sight:

Feeling positive today. It's such a relief to get past Friday. I find Friday evening so hard. Going to the pub after work on Friday was like my fave thing. I didn't do my walk this morning, too rainy, but still went to running club. DS football was cancelled due to waterlogged pitch which he was sad about.

Find me that vid @Ynwa1234 I need to do something. I'm gong to start being good with eating on Monday (can't rush these things!) as I feel like I'm getting bigger. I might not be, don't dare weigh self.

@joysmoy hope you're hanging in there and seeing strong.

Orchid, Rupert, everyone. Hope everyone is ok. Come back and update us. No pressure obvs, I know life is crazy. Just good to keep each other going

Also. Day 40!

Hi everyone writing if you search women's health arm exercises it comes up with a whole routine of exercise. I also use it for leg exercises too. Well my cold has gone and I have the weekend off!! Will be 70 days sober tomorrow.

Is anyone watching EastEnders? I found last night's episode quite thought provocing I knew exactly what Linda was going to do, I really felt for her but, had wondered how she had sailed through sobriety when you think how bad her drinking was.

What plans does everyone have for the weekend? It's a bit wet and windy here but I am still going out for a walk soon. Will try to convince my DC to come my dd is nearly 13 and is quite difficult to get out the house.

Morning everyone, day 76 I cant believe it Congrays rupert on over 70 too moe and everyone else on their days

@writingsonthewall I LOVE the nails, it's a gorgeous colour, very hallowen-y. Great idea about homework in a coffee shop, I think son 7 would like that (partial lockdown still here)

@hazelnutmochi somethings working, fair play on the weight loss and fitting your jeans, you have got to be delighted with that. I also live in Jean's and got a lovely comfy pair of black cords in m &,s that I'm also living in.

@ymna did you recently go to counselling? I would love a rota but I'd say that would really 'anger it'. We are slowly getting back to good form here. Pulling his weight more. I cant believe the sudden and dramatic change. It's like living with Jekyll and hyde. I'm shoving him out the door for hikes. He went off with the 10 year old yesterday eve to the east pier and took photos of the city and he and dd are going to sketch them together today. I'll take that ANYTHING that sorts out his MH. (They are both amazing at art) He also said he was going to the GP monday. I just nodded furiously in agreement and said 'that is a great idea'.

@Rupertpenrysmistress how are you feeling? Did you enjoy your weekend free of work? Rarer than hens teeth I'd say. I know what you mean, a couple of 'medicinal' drinks would have been nice.

@joysmoy are you hanging in there with the booze?

I'm a huge baker (sadly for my belly) and I flicked onto Nadiya. So I baked her chocolate and creme caramel flan yesterday. Bit disappointed in the overall flavour but it looked deadly. The boys were in bed when we tucked in so the rest will be demolished shortly I'd say. I had started making salted caramel sponge cakes for birthdays and that was absolutely gorgeous. Need a new bake now for next week.:) still havent gotten off my hole and exercised. I really really really have to. I just cant seem to find the motivation at all.

Des is starting for us on Monday. Bet your jealous :) feck all on otherwise.

Vit c hasnt kicked in yet. Its expensive and I'm not great at looking after the mush. I'm not menopausal YET but some of my pals are and I'm dreading it. I have to change my lifestyle now. At least the booze is a start.

Lashing here, no SN football I'd say, not allowed indoors.

DH has a nephew and his lovely wife just announced she is pregnant with a gir, they were wondering if we still had our cot. I was pissing myself laughing, 10 years with 4 kids in it, nah it fell completely apart and i still kept last child in it as I was too lazy to move him to a bed at a reasonable age. It didnt stop DH frantically pulling the attic apart looking for it. He just wouldn't believe that it's in the shagging dump

Anyway all lovely and quiet here. Have the first episode of 'life's BBC to watch now. Love Alison Steadman.