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Alcohol support
Day 1 for anyone just starting out
Justdonthavethefirstone · 02/08/2020 13:58
Hi all. This is my day 1. I have joined some other threads for support but thought I would start a new one for anyone just starting out on this journey. I have a drink problem. It got worse over lockdown.i have had day 1 before and failed but this time I am starting off prepared. I have books to read. I have joined Mumsnet for support and have told my family and friends.
Ynwa12345 · 03/08/2020 17:46
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Justdonthavethefirstone · 03/08/2020 19:20
Sorry to hear about your toothache Ywna (I need to learn to tag too)
We are doing great and this particular day is nearly over. I have struggled today. Can’t focus. Mind in a whirl so I have kept busy reading. I am now heading for a bath and going for an early night. Day 2 is over
Hope you are all doing ok. Handhold to get everyone through
Rupertpenrysmistress · 03/08/2020 20:26
Evening all, I have had an interesting day, my DM popped in with a bottle of fizzy wine 🙄, she said you need to try this so, was earlier than I wanted but I had to say I am taking a break from alcohol for a while (not quite ready to reveal) and told her she should take it home.
I made my apologies to the relevant people today who were all lovely. I feel really positive and am so looking forward to day 2 I am done with day 1.
My dad gave me some books today so that's part of my plan, nice relax in the sun with an iced coffee. I am not worried about my diet just yet, just not drinking. One day at a time. I highly recommend the alcohol free ciders, kopparberg and another one Mount something!
Thanks all for your support today, it's great to find like minded people who understand. I think this will help us to be successful.
Also I saw up thread someone recommended clipper sleep tea, it is fab, also herbal nytol works for me.
Have a great evening everyone, here is to a sober Tuesday.
Ynwa12345 · 03/08/2020 20:26
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Ynwa12345 · 03/08/2020 20:29
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Justdonthavethefirstone · 03/08/2020 21:58
@Rupertpenrysmistress well done for declining the fizz and being so brave telling your family what a huge step. Well done getting through today
@Ynwa1234 nothing worse than toothache when you are trying to give up booze and look after the kids. Do well done for sticking with it. I gave up smoking years ago but there’s no way I could have gave up booze and smoking at same time. Focus on one thing worry about rest later. I have kids too so feel free to post on here if you like. Maybe we can support each other with parenting too. Don’t feel obliged those as you may want to keep things separate.
BunniesBunniesBunnies · 03/08/2020 22:11
Hey guys, I’m on one of the other threads but just wanted to say massive well done to you all for recognising you want a break from alcohol. As someone who was where you were not so long ago I want to say hang in there, it all does get sooo much better and easier. Good luck all!!!
Ynwa12345 · 04/08/2020 07:49
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Rupertpenrysmistress · 04/08/2020 08:07
ynwa when you say treading on eggshells is it just because he is working? My DH is a bit like that he is mainly WFH now and sometimes gets so angry about work but, it creates a horrible feeling otherwise he is very supportive.
I work full time so really need me time to think and process those thoughts you speak of. I am listening to Annie on audible because I am struggling to concentrate, normally love reading.
I assume as your children are up and fighting they are still quite young? Mine are 11 & 12 so that makes my life alot easier.
So here we are at day 2 that's really positive, I had an awful sleep last night, mind going over cat trying to sleep on my head 😂.
Is there anything in particular bothering you? Or is it past events?
I hope you get some time to yourself today to read, it makes it feel like you are trying to help yourself so it is really important. Would you go for a walk when your DH finishes work? It's nice to have something to look forward to.
It is my birthday this week so are going for a pub lunch and having a BBQ. Need to stock up on Becks blue.
cookbook2000 · 04/08/2020 08:10
Hi, just wanted to say good luck to you all. I gave up drinking about three years ago and, as difficult as it was, it made me feel so good - no being impatient with the children, no regretting what I'd said the day before, no more hangovers. Just make sure you all look after yourselves in other ways. I started to love myself again and found I had time for me again. I started to exercise more, socialising more, reading, studying. It certainly isn't easy and you'll find other people don't seem to like it (when you're out socialising etc), but I didn't care, I liked going out, having proper conversations with people, and remembering them in the morning. I found I got to know people again...and properly.
I did miss drinking sometimes though (at weddings or special events for example) and about six months ago started to drink again at occasions like these. The difference now is that that is the only really time I drink and I really enjoy it. I also now know when to stop.
I know how difficult it is, but I'm sending lots of love and positive vibes your way 😁😁❤️
Rupertpenrysmistress · 04/08/2020 08:33
billysboy that is a tough question. I think I have had a drinking problem for 10 years so reversing that sounds difficult. Allan Carr maintains it is not will power that gets you through, he believes it is achievable with change to your thinking. My most successful quit was 4 months thanks to Allan Carr then I did the, oh I have done so well I can just have one, and here I am. My life was so so much better without the drink I don't know why I traded it.
How many days are you?
Justdonthavethefirstone · 04/08/2020 09:55
Morning all day 3 here. Think I had about 30 seconds sleep last night. My mind on is one. Worrying about work and schools. You name it it’s all spinning. However
I feel better physically already, the nausea has gone, as has the slight jitters and the really fuzzy head.
It’s so hard having someone in the house trying to work when you have young kids. Mine are older so it’s much easier.
@cookbook2000 thank you so much for your encouragement. 3 years is amazing. I just need to get past day 3 first 🤣
@billysboy morning, I have no idea, I did read Allan Carr and his way of thinking is amazing but I think you also need to be ready and I just wasn’t. However I did take from him that alcohol is a drug and I took it as if alcohol was beside other drugs in the local shop such as cocaine I wouldn’t go near that aisle so I am going to use that image when I have to go to shop this morning.
Ynwa12345 · 04/08/2020 11:07
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Justdonthavethefirstone · 04/08/2020 11:30
Sounds quite stressful but your doing great. I have been there. My partner worked from home for years. He seemed to think that I could freeze everything to allow him to work.
One of the scariest things for me about stopping alcohol is having to face up to my life which I know makes me unhappy. I know I need to be sober to deal with it, but it’s so scarey and that’s why I always just drank to numb it. It’s a viscous circle that I need to break
Ynwa12345 · 04/08/2020 11:30
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Ynwa12345 · 04/08/2020 11:36
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Okayokayok · 04/08/2020 13:05
Hi everyone just checking in. I also have small kids at home but thankfully OH goes out to work at 9am so I don't need to worry about keeping kids quiet....our house is a bit of a madhouse with young boys/preteen daughter/various pets so I cant imagine being able to keep them quiet for OH to work at home!
Last night I slept like a baby and had VERY vivid dreams! Feeling good today, did a little morning work out and have drinking lots of water. Will go for a power walk this afternoon with the dog.
Hope everyone is doing good!
Ynwa12345 · 04/08/2020 13:49
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Rupertpenrysmistress · 04/08/2020 14:47
I have done CBT in the past which included mindfulness, I liked how it taught me to reframe things. I used to worry about everything, I lost weight and got really depressed. My counselor taught me, when you get an unpleasant feeling/intrusive thought to acknowledge it, know it makes you feel awful but then let it go. It really does work, it sounds a bit cukoo and I am a very skeptical person, my career is science based so I initially did not think it would work. It does take time to get it right but honestly it lessened my mental load. I know if I stop drinking the remaining issues and anxiety i have disappear. Yes problems are still there but they are magnified 10 fold, without the fog of alcohol or a hangover I see things with clarity and trust myself to make the right decision.
I actually quite like my sober self, I feel I have control over my life and anything is possible.
This is why I wonder why I keep drinking. The drink makes me a second rate mother, wife and employee, as I cannot fully give myself to any role whilst alcohol has a hold on me. Sorry for the ramble hope it helps someone.
Ynwa12345 · 04/08/2020 15:08
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