Who should go to work tomorrow?

[NotSureICanDoIt]

Today was my first day at a new job - one I am very lucky to have. I probably wouldn’t find another one as good again. Not going in tomorrow will look very, very bad and potentially jeopardise my job.
DP is a GP and has a 30 patient clinic tomorrow.

DD3 is ill. Some sort of virus, fever, headache, sore throat, no appetite. There’s no way she’ll be well enough for nursery tomorrow.

DP thinks I should stay home with her and I think he should. Up until this point I’ve been a SAHM so things like this weren’t an issue. He has never ever had to cancel work before.

Who gets to go to work tomorrow?

Or vice versa- shows willing to your employer.

He should do it. Set aside whose job is more important (we don't know - they may be able to call another locum is). I am a copywriter and I know there are a million of us competing against AIs now. You don't want to lose this job.

Can you book a child minder possibly? Are Grandparents available?

We had someone new at my workplace who never even got to their first day, they were seriously ill in hospital. When they recovered, several weeks later, they started in the job. Not all workplaces are draconian.

That can't be a serious suggestion, who in their right minds would leave any child never mind a sick one with a "local teen" ?

Are you thinking of a 14 year old who's bunking off school for the day? Should she pop a post on her local Facebook group?

What an insane suggestion

You’re a gp who can’t read the op’s posts?

god i remember these days so well, and I have close friends and family- if a young kid is poorly they really want to be at home with a parent and not many people want to risk germs by looking after a poorly child. i have never seen an emergency nanny service and i really doubt many people would want to leave a poorly kid with a stranger.
my dh would very rarely take time off when the kids were ill, his job technically was ‘more important’ and definitely he was the main breadwinner but actually this made him far less replaceable and more job secure than me. I guess a little different as a locum.
Not helpful for now but i do think this is tricky when they’ve relied on you as a SAHM to always be the one to sort it. We had many arguments about this.
I guess the other option is could you both do a half day??? possibly a faff though.

What is "insane" about it? Our local Facebook page frequently has people looking for babysitters.

Him . No doubt , you cannot skip work on second day

Some people have nobody to rely on , I dont .

You go to work. Easy one.

You think a childminder who happens to have a space tomorrow will take a child they’ve never met before, just for a day…oh and who happens to be sick?

some people are quite literally worryingly mad.

Virtually no one on here has said that it depends on OP's employer.

One of my colleagues had only been in the job for 2 days when her child was taken seriously ill and ended up being in hospital for 4 weeks. She got good wishes and was able to resume her job when her child was better.

There is also the point that a person on their 2nd day in a job is unlikely to be doing much of value. Whereas OP's DH definitely is.

You go in tomorrow as you are on probation. After that 50/50 depending on who has something very important and definitely with two working parents you need back up plans for illness. Congrats on the new job and returning to work!

What a typical fucking man. You've just spent god knows how long on maternity leave looking after her, finally secured an amazing job to keep yourself financially secure should anything happen and just to be a successful person in their own right, yet he gets priority for work? No no no. You just started, you need to go in. You cannot call in sick on your second day that would be awful. If he cares about you and your DD he can take a single day off work. Besides, she's ill, he's a GP, the stars have aligned.

Have a great day at work

This is the second post that has just ‘clarified’ that a GP isn’t God - they already know that, why do you think it needs repeating?

The chip on the shoulder that some people have around doctors is insane. Won’t even start on the ludicrous ‘big man’ comments.

It does interest me that it apparently doesn’t matter if a GP turns up to work, as they’re doing pointless shit anyway. Quite at odds with literally every other thread about GPs……..

OP you’ll need to go to work. Your husband needs to do what female doctors do and work out a support network for next time. It’s absolutely true you can’t just go calling in sick the way you can in some jobs, so you have backups on your backups. Until now his backup was you, now he needs to broaden it. If he’s not sure how tell him to ask the female doctors with children he knows.

Not her husband.
She's already sacrificed 3 years of her career, but that's not enough if your partner (again, not husband) is a locum? Frankly he shouldn't have had a child if his job makes it so impossible to take time off when they're sick, it sounds completely irresponsible, and it is not down to OP to make all the sacrifice to enable his choices.

Babyaitters for prearranged nights out who can be vetted and met in advance is a wildly different issue to looking for a warm body post 9pm for tomorrow morning

I've seen more than one person given a hard time for asking about babysitters on my local groups and warned about the dangers of unknown child carers. Mostly posts in poor English, I assume parents possibly from countries with very different cultures and norms around childcare

And potentially lose her job? No he should

No employer will be impressed by this though tbh, and her daughter is generally ill and doubtful she needs 4 weeks in hospital. Was your friend a single parent? It irks me that this girl has 2 parents but the male is assuming it's the woman's automatic role to take time off from her brand new job to care for her.

He's been in his job presumably years, she started yesterday. Who is more likely to be penalised for taking a day off? I would say OP, surely.

Calm down 😂

Sourced from a friend, a neighbour. You know, someone local. Obviously.

The kid has a cold ffs, hardly needs more than the calpol topping up and back to back bluey.

”Wildly different”
“Insane”

What hysterical language for suggesting there might be a young adult who lives down the road happy to sit with the child for a few hours.

yes there are emergency childcare options that exist - you need to find out about them asap if you don’t have anyone else who can help. Obviously you can’t work from home with a sick child so that’s not a plan for the future. And obviously you should go in to work tomorrow not him

Yeah, this reply aligns with your first post.

you have no idea what the child is ill with as, ironically, you are not a doctor. We have scarlet fever running rampant in our nursery, amongst other joys.

won’t even start on the rest of your post. Have a good eve, and if you have kids, long may they stay in good health

Not everyone has a support network.