Did she really just say this?! WTAF?!

[Takemebacktothenorth]

Hi,

I'm trying not to be outraged by this, but I just can't get my head around this womans comment!

Joined a friend app a few months a go and have actually been pleasantly surprised by it so far and have met some lovely women and made a few good friends, which was the aim, so am obviously happy.

However, I had been chatting to this woman for a few days and she sounded like an intelligent, interesting person, but when she asked what my husband did for a living and I corrected her and said "sorry, wife", she got really strange and said, "I'm sorry, but I'm really just looking for friends, which is why I'm on a friend app" 😶🤔🙄

Erm....what? 1, why would I try to find women on a friend app when there are plenty of dating apps? 2, why would I try and chat her up by telling her I had a wife?! So many whys here!!

It's absolutely ridiculous and bloody insulting! Does me having a wife mean I can't possibly have a platonic relationship with a woman?!

Just venting really.

What a stupid woman! Good job she showed her bigot hand early so you haven’t wasted any time on her.

Shes a homophobic dumbass

She's an idiot, simple as that. 🤷‍♀️

She sounds delightful. Be glad you aren't wasting any more time on her.

But can I ask what app you're using?

She obviously assumes that all gay people are promiscuous. Silly woman.

why would I try and chat her up by telling her I had a wife

She's either homophobic, thinks you're looking for a threesome, or she's got the wrong end of the stick entirely. I take it you're not pursuing the friendship?

Rude. I hope you said me too, I'm happily married.

Are you female or male and does she know this?

The thing is, I really didn't get "dumbass" or "idiot" vibes at all. She seemed quite clever and I thought, nice.

@SirChenjins Hmm it's a tricky one. Maybe I just need to peel back that homophobic layer 😂

It’s the weird one dimensional view of anyone who is gay, they only see being gay as sexual. Not a whole, multi faceted parson. Years ago I was friends with quite a famous gay man ( since died, RIP lovely man) and I was really shocked at some of the things said to him and his partner. It was obvious from some of the ( weird) questions that some people thought they were just together for sex, not love, mutual interests, mutual support, mutual ambitions and a dozen other reasons.
Ignorant woman.

@MrsEricBana pretty much, just that.

@WallaceinAnderland I'm a woman and yes, she definitely knows it. You have to verify your profile picture.

Is English her first language, perhaps she misunderstood?
What a strange reply, I don't get how it was meant to insult you? What does she mean, I'm only looking for friends, did she think you were gonna start hitting on her?
🤦🏼
I would reply asking
What do you mean?
🤔🤔🤔

What did you reply??

Please don't just ignore and block, she'll think she was right and you were cracking on to her

I wonder if she thinks that you are male which has made her defensive?

Urgghh, what an absolute fanny she is! I mean, clearly as you are a lesbian you are actually only planning on shagging her (🙄🙄🙄 my eyes are rolling so hard they've gone white!) it's not like you actually want to have friends!

What is the name of the friend app? I like the sound of that.

Sorry didn’t see your last post.

In that case she’s just a twat

But don’t you realise OP, she’s irresistible!! 😂

I’ve often come across men reacting like this, who somehow feel personally threatened by gay men, but interestingly this is the first woman I’ve heard about. She is obviously not as confident and intelligent as she first seemed.

Obviously being female with a wife means you try it on with every woman you meet.
Homophobic idiot. Tell her to piss off

She’s done you a favour by showing you early on that she’s an idiot. Now you
don't need to waste any more time on her.

what a weird (and yes, homophobic) response from her! Does that mean she refuses to be friends with anyone other than heterosexual women in real life because she's clearly so irresistible? And as you say, even if you did want a romantic relationship surely mentioning you had a wife would not be the obvious precursor to that!

I'd be tempted to respond with a "???? what do you mean? I'm here for the same reason, I didn't realise lesbians weren't allowed to have friends?"

Do you mind me asking what the app is?
I wouldn’t think about it too much. She obviously has issues.

Well there are a LOT of people on here who think straight men and women cant be friends. I expect she was one of those and her mind was blown...

Is it possible she thinks that as you already have a female best friend, you really don't need or want another?

What did you reply?

I think I'd have said "well yes, it's a friendship site. I imagined you were here for the same reason? Why does me having a wife change that reason for me in your mind?"

Basically she then has to admit she's a homophonic dumbass or she'll disappear which just confirms she is - in fact - a homophobic dumbass.

And let's face it. You song need twats in your life as friends.

Sounds like true homophobia, maybe subliminal. Like she literally panicked when she realised you were a gay woman. What an idiot. Maybe they don’t have any gays in her village? 🙄