I'm queer. AMA?

[Throwaway4Water]

Using a throwaway account for this.

Hey Mumsnet, figured more queer rep was needed on this site.
I'm Genderfluid, which is under the trans umbrella and means my gender is fluid and changes often. I'm also Asexual, and currently questioning my romantic attraction.
Anything phobic will be ignored (I know what this site is like when it comes to trans people) as well as anything I deem too personal. Now, AMA! :)

Personally, labels are important to me bc I like knowing there's a term for what I am. I spent many years thinking something was wrong with me bc everyone else around me were getting into relationships, but I felt absolutely nothing towards anyone around me. Now after doing my own research and looking at other people who feel the same, I like having a definition so I know I'm not alone in my preference

All the questions must be phobic.

@WindowsSmindows It is a daily part of me I have to figure out, not a part of my personality. I've worked out the quickest way to get a good vibe on how I am today by asking myself "do I want breasts today?" and working it out from there xD

I am a heterosexual woman. AMA.

I’m as interested in other peoples sexuality and gender as I expect you are in mine.

I would be interested to know what your favourite biscuit is?

What is the difference between you on a male gender day and on a female gender day?

@Auntieobem It means some days I'm a girl, some days I'm a boy, some days I'm neither, some days I'm both, and some days I'm all three. That's the easiest way I can describe it tbh

Do you work? all this switching would put me off work.

@JustTheOneSwan I don't watch Wimbledon, or any sport except NFL really. I find tennis really boring 😅

I've worked out the quickest way to get a good vibe on how I am today by asking myself "do I want breasts today?"

Oh, dear God.

What's the difference between feeling like a boy or a girl or neither? Genuine question- how do you define each gender feeling?

Wow your gender boils down to your breasts? I can't even fill an a cup but it has nothing to do with me being male or female. Don't you think it's sad that something has made you feel you'd sometimes rather not have a part of your body?

What is your 'Gender' in the sense you are using it?

What do you mean by being a boy or girl in this context?

How old are you?

@tellmewhentheLangshiplandscoz well, homophobic or transphobic stuff for this specific thread I suppose. I'm taking all questions as genuine unless they include hateful speech, are telling me my gender/sexuality doesn't exist, etc.

Not meant snarkily, am actually curious: do you genuinely believe others around you (except your mum, to whom the minutiae of your life is infinitely fascinating, natch) are interested in your gender? And do you think talking about it helps or hinders your progress in life?

There’s all sorts of things about me that I find quite interesting and which I think are a big part of who I am; but which I don’t share with e.g. my colleagues because a) I doubt they’re that interested and b) if probably wouldn’t do my career much good if the CEO knew I spent Friday night snorting MDMA off my friend’s boob.

Do you have any hobbies?

If a dolphin was to enter a diving competition, how would it get up the stairs to the diving board?

@onlywhenidream Unless somebody is Agender, which is the absence of gender entirely, or something similar, then yes. Gender differs from personality bc personality is something that you can change and shift over time. You can mask your gender (by acting as your agab if you're trans, for example) but you can't change it. I'm Genderfluid and always have been, even before I realised it. If that makes sense

Since you cant actually change your sex, does this just mean you have a big wardrobe? Why is anyone supposed to care?

I assume that you are a child as you refer to yourself as sometimes a girl and sometimes a boy and sometimes both. I get that. But what so you mean that sometimes you're a girl and sometimes you're a boy? How does girl you differ from boy you?

What is agab?

Try a sports bra under a baggy top on those days FFS, but your still the same sex you were when you went to bed, and the day before that and the day you were born.

@Dancingwithhyenas Gender itself is not an easy thing to define, and I believe a strict definition of just "gender" is something we need to move past bc it's just not that simple anymore

How can gender never change but also be fluid?

@PastMyBestBeforeDate Well too much of anything is unhealthy, not just introspection. But as someone with anxiety I find it hard not to analyse every little thought that goes through my head, but it's something I'm hoping to work on through therapy :3

@Getoffmyshoes I wear pronoun badges for this reason😄And if someone misgenders me, I'd correct them, but most of the time my parents/friends actually get there before I do lol