The Bluestocking - the one where the nights start to draw in

[Boiledbeetle]

Previous thread:

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/5401672-the-autumn-bluestocking-mist-mellow-fruitfulness-and-hot-chocolate

Settles down in the comfy chair by the fire.

Lace knitting is definitely a sober activity, @MyrtleLion - and it helps to mark out each set of repetitions of the lace pattern with stitch markers so that you don’t go too wrong.

I’m glad to hear that your foot is getting better.

I’m worn out defending on a thread.

@Taztoy I just had a quick look to see which thread, & it looks like something/someone on there has triggered you massively. Please know that you're amongst friends on this thread. I get it. I admire you for fighting on that thread - I tend to walk away if something gets bad, so the fact that you stayed & gave them what for is amazing to me. But now you can rest.

I’ve been accused of harassing someone who didn’t read my name on my posts. How the fuck is that my fault?

I've put you in the library as it's nice & quiet right now - I hope that's OK.

It isn't your fault if people can't read. You mean someone else was harassing them, & they thought it was you?

Breathes book smell.

no they replied to me. But they said if they had realised it was me they wouldn’t have replied so nicely 😂😂

So I said well my name is on my posts. It’s not my fault you didn’t read it. as the kids say that would be a you problem

and they told me to go away I was harassing them.

🙄Well, what can you do? There's a thing I read decades ago which has stuck with me & might be relevant here:

Never argue with a fool. Anyone who sees you will only think, 'Oh look! There's two fools arguing!'.

😂Now, is there anything else the gerbils can bring you?

A pencil sharpener so I can edit my complaint against the police? That’s the next thing on the horizon. I was gonna wait til the case was heard but I’m getting more and more enraged at the lazy and biased policing I’m experiencing.

Sorry you are being got at, Taztoy, you've been very brave and constant in discussions I've seen, and that comes at a cost.

I'm glad you came here to be 'amongst friends' as Android said, and the gerbils are pulling out all the stops with tea and scones and champagne and cakes..
and it looks like you're going to be really spoilt by having Corinna Capybara give you a foot massage - that's extra special treatment, and well deserved

That's great news, you're making great progress Myrtle - maybe at some point in your recovery Corinna Capybara could pop round to give you a foot massage?

@Taztoy Is there an organisaton that could advise you about that? Like when & how best to do it? I don't know enough about it, so if it was me I'd look for advice.

And perhaps I'd write down everything that's happened & all the things I want to complain about - & then wait for a while. It's good to get things (a) clear & (b) recorded because I find that things can swirl around in the mind & putting them on paper can ease the pressure & free up a bit of mental space: I no longer have to actively remember them. Also, if in the future you do make a complaint, you have the facts ready to be accessed & used.

@MarieDeGournay I like the little gerbil who's giving Corinna a back massage as she's going about her work! That was the AI's invention.

Sadly for me I can do it better than any agency (that’s not meant to be dismissive of the support - I’ve had loads of emotional support from various organisations) but I’m very good at setting it out and getting it perfect and referring to all the right documents and asking the right questions. But thank you!

Then all I can offer you is the gentle sound of the gerbil string quartet currently playing at the other end of the library...

Thank you

Taztoy, I've been getting a sense that a bully or bullies is deliberately targetting you, and it is both unkind and unfair. I admire your resilience but am sorry you are having to deploy it.

I do feel the same and it’s reassuring that others see it. They’re wanting a reaction out of me. But. They won’t get what they want. Because being an autist, it’s clear to me - and relatively simple. The law says… so why are you breaking the law? Why is that ok?

But it’s frustrating to be ignored or accused of harassing someone for answering points they made and replied to me but because they didn’t realise it was me I’m harassing them. How does that even work?

@Taztoy I always find it helpful when dealing with someone or something that I need to write to, to create a draft full of my anger irritation and as many swear words as possible and then file it away

until I can find a reasons calm phraseology

so

dear fucking ugly bastard fuckwits

i hate you beyond imagination

you are so appallingly awful at your job you ought to be put in stocks so I can chuck tomatoes at you

doubtless you have no concept of your failings nor no matter what will never have

I wish you terrible ill will bla bla bla

it has worked for me

This is a fantastic idea.

Anyone can report any post as a personal attack, if that helps. Or maybe 'not a genuine poster'.

They’re clever enough not to attack me. They wilfully misunderstand and belittle and laugh at my experience (which is fine. Shit move in my opinion but they’re entitled to do that apparently here that’s ok) and then they say - when they didn’t read properly - that I’ve to go away im harassing them.

it's very subtle 'death by a thousand (spiteful) cuts' stuff, hard to challenge any individual post. And the understaffed and not entirely neutral weekend staff are unlikely to look at a whole body of work.

It's something that's been annoying me. Apparently under the rules, if someone does repeated goady posts that outrageously misrepresent you, that's not a personal attack, but if you respond rudely, you get a deletion and maybe a waggy finger email.

It shouldn't bother me, because I've been in worse places for having an argument, but it's infuriating.

It is one of the things that makes me regret not having a 'hide this poster' function on MN. Obviously it's possible to ignore the irritating humanoid gnats, but that takes more effort than they are worth.

There is something wrong with far too many people.

I asked for this recently - &, I think, suggested that if we can't hide a poster, MN might add a colour option to colour the posts of people we'd like to ignore, to make it easier to identify & scroll past them.

That didn't make it into the latest colour changes.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/site_stuff/5378327-mute-user-button?reply=146037410

There's just one page. MN replied to the mute button request, but not the colour one.