The Bluestocking is reopening

[ErrolTheDragon]

It's time we reopened the Bluestocking, I think.

This is the FWR pub, situated in the charming village of Badley Fuckitt near the Shady Pines rest home. It has a cannon (for reasons lost in the mists of time), goats in the paddock next to the beer garden and a menu including many soups and cakes. It's open all hours, serving breakfast and tea to all weary women, in addition to being the ideal location to metaphorically drown your sorrows.

Naice coffee ...

Is it Ok if I bring my knitting? I could knit in the suffragette colours.

Thank you, that looks delicious. Hmmm, and it is too.

And I am willing to share my cheese scone recipe with chef - the secret is to ignore the recipe completely, when it tells you how much cheese to put in. I use at least double the amount, then some more to be on the safe side. Basically so much cheese that the scones lose all structural integrity and come out of the oven as splats rather than scones. Not aesthetically pleasing but delicious.

See I'm in agreement with the marsupial pouch being handy and all that. I'm just a bit worried that I'd lose things.

On the other hand, there would be opportunities to rediscover lost cake and wine I guess, so not all bad.

Now see, there I was posting for brevity and I've had to come back to explain!😁Daughter was visiting, for her birthday, (she lives about 4 hours drive away). She parked about 100 meters from the house, fell over and snapped her fib and tib!!!!!!!
Poor girls had to be operated on and now we are unsure how she's going to get home, her wife can drive the dogs home but goodness knows how we're going to get her home.
Sorry for dumping on the patrons of the pub🙄

Oh, poor lamb. One of my sprogs broke both the bones in her arm somehow slipping and sitting down hard on the carpet. She looked like she had two wrists! She had to have an op. But now you can barely see the scar. She was very brave. I drove her, like a demon, to the hospital.

I hope she's better soon and the car logistics get sorted out too.

Can I ask what Sunday Roasts are available tomorrow please?

In an ideal world I'd like to pop in for prime rib of beef, Yorkshire's, roasties and lashings of red wine gravy.

Plus cauliflower cheese, buttered savoy cabbage and roasted glazed carrots. I will be upset if there is no horseradish sauce...

Bottle of decent red wine for the table.

No starter, cos I want room for pudding. A passion fruit crème brûlée would go down nicely

There's proper sinus clearing horseradish.

We've got French rack of lamb if anyone wants a portion.

I’m off to a shady part of the garden with a double g&t and extra ice. A warm cheese scone on the side would be perfect, and if the handsome man is free, he’s welcome to waft his fan over me, especially if he’s Idris Elba.

Can you put my name down for roast beef too, please? Medium rare, with Yorkshire puddings the size of a fist. Thanks!

I'll stick a order in for the roast beef and the French rack of lamb. Two roasties and 24 Yorkshire puddings and a decent jug of gravy.

Oh and mint sauce.

Who be eating pickled onion monster munch?

<waves from the Mah Jong inglenook>

I'll have a negroni, thanks, & happy to share my scampi fries with the Pub Cat.

We have to go to a party tonight. An hour on the tube there, and then the late night tube back home again. It's party with a theme, which means I have to get dressed up. My only concession to that is wearing a dress. I shall put some mascara on, and that's it. I'd far rather just be at home. A real case of JOMO rather than FOMO!

decent jug of gravy

The only sort! Not a bone leaves this house without first going into the stock pot.

Me! Got a pint of draught cider to go with. I'm in the mahjong inglenook, just watching. I'm trying to pick up the rules.

...ignore the bare feet

I don't eat red meat, so just a massive portion of yorkies for me please. As long as they aren't cooked in beef fat. (Controversial!)

Oh, and some veggies too.

Handsome Idris Elba is a hologram. I hope that explains everything.

Well, Is ugly Idris available as a real person? Or a genie? I'll just close my eyes.

You minx!

Good lord. You mean people actually (shudders) put clothes on and go out?! I couldn't be doing that! Last time I had a night out you could still smoke in the pubs Actually inside, on a seat, with your pint!

Has much changed since 2007?

😬

I'll substitute my pickled onion Monster Munch with Mackie's Pickled Onion crisps - lovely and thick and so sour that your cheeks sook in.

A few people have mentioned scones. A place near me does the best savoury scones (I've never been a fan before) - my favourite is the wild garlic and nigella seed ones. I'll ask for some to take away.

Jus don't be wigglin them toes. The remind me of worms.

The Bluestocking is the most ideal of ideal pubs, so of course good beef will be on the board - as will other meats, I'm sure, and a good veggie alternative. Doubtless something tasty for vegans too though I'm not sure what for Sunday lunch.

This is all a bit blatant isnt it?