Badley Fuckitt Welcomes Careful Drivers

[boatyardblues]

That's where I want to live right now. Home of the Bluestocking pub and the Shady Pines, the favoured retirement home of gin-swilling, cantankerous elderly gender crit feminists. It's like that village in the Dales which dodged the bubonic plague and is a haven from PoMo fuckwittery. Anyone else in?

katvonblackdeath loving the name change. But in honour of your previous moniker I think you should call your new abode in Badley Fuckitt "Gulag Cottage".

Can I come in?

I think you need a string quartet playing Boccherini in the teashop. I can play the violin and cello but not at the same time.

As much as I abhor the Guardian I very much like the Feast food section on a Saturday and yes there should be a wide spectrum of reading material in the shop...
I'd be up for food/cooking related activities and can there be a lovely bookshop too...?

Definitely interested and need to relocate.
Thinking I could set up a small bookshop-cum-library.

Very good timing this.

I would love a bookshop

I can play the violin and cello but not at the same time.

I play violin and viola, again, not at the same time.

Always makes me think of the Ladykillers (original version of course). Mrs Lopsided will of course live in Badley Fuckitt (I am sure Mrs Lopsided is GC, in a quiet "but of course it's obvious dear" sort of way).

Silver Moon bookshop?

This village is sounding splendid!

If you’ll let some of the young ‘uns in, I can provide the pub with decent gf fare

Never thought about it before but yes Mrs Lopsided is totally GC in the way you describe. ("Maybe you'd feel better after a shave, dear.")

It will indeed be a local shop for local people. Only naice things tho, and no blue hair dye (just lilac etc for those of us who are taking the Mrs Slocombe approach to advancing years).

Of course we want young 'uns in the village - it's only Shady Pines which was for the 'elderly', though tbh I'm pretty sure it takes anyone who needs a good rest.

Silver Moon bookshop?

Perhaps Silver Moonbeam more appropriate?

There's got to be a book club for sure. Happy to set up the Badley Fuckitt Book Club. What will be first up? The Second Sex? Or something from Jilly Cooper's Oeuvre?

I am so excited about the upcoming move to Badley Fuckitt.

If it is in the dales, might I ask whether it's limestone country or gritstone country? I would like a nice gritstone edge above the village if that could be arranged. And will the cafe cater to climbers too (pint mugs of tea, chip butties)? Happy to have two rooms, a genteel cakes and doilies room and a chipped wooden tables and old copies of "Climber" room. With posters of the female greats - Alison Hargreaves, Lynn Hill, Catherine Desteville (yup, that list's dating me...)

I'm hoping that there are pleasant walks to be taken in the environs, and readily available excellent coffee.
And loads and loads of cake.
Plus a dance like no one is watching disco night at the pub.

I'm in, can do gardening, help in bookshop and generally waft around lending a hand where needed. Could also offer a wine/gin delivery service with a small bike trailer and a blue light for urgent deliveries.

I also have allotment skillz.

And a Scrabble board.

Please, please, can it be a soft water area?

Please, please, can it be a soft water area?

Excellent, that's two votes for gritstone country then. God's own rock, I'll have you know.

I'm hoping that the bookshop will be carrying the collected works of Germaine Bunbury...?

A copy of Bunbury's seminal work, How To Build a Community Aided by Gin will be in every residence. A bit like a Gideon bible, only for us.

Please be careful not to trip over my dog on your way into the pub, it's easy to miss a dachshund slumbering half under the table.

I’ll second grit edegs ( and Fermat if needed)

r0wan beat me to the book shop/library opening

May i join you r0wan

I could cover lunches

Is the village near the sea?

You're on, MIdge, but we'll have to start on diffs 'cos I am really rusty (and getting on, definitely not one of the bright young things...)