X Factor Results! Will it be a fat full milk with extra vanilla free cornflake for all? Or something that makes actual sense?

[SuePurblybiltbyElves]

Who can tell?

I am going with Chowmein and Rylan at the bottom tonight. And will be sticking fingers in my ears throughout Rhianna.

I love snow patrol.

They're not lighting up very much bless em

jessie- it's a lovely song, by Athlete. The lead singer wrote it about his premature baby

If they do the key change, the Power of the Wang will save them...

Miserable little fuckers. Go back to your dressing room and choke on Lynx fumes.

Although they appear to be doing a cover of Leona Lewis's cover.

Not the same without the N Irish accent at all...

DD11 is going a bit gooey over quiffyshit. She is sitting v.close to the screen and beaming at him

Leona ruined this song for me.

There's ya key change Sue.

Are they all constipated? The faces, the stomach clutching, the bending at the knees...

I think I prefer Rylan...

I possibly have aggression issues.

What was Rylan's song?

They need a good dose of syrup of figs and an early night.

No, BOF, you said what many of us were thinking.

Rylan is a lovely man. A bit bonkers but lovely, look at him with the kids there.

Me too that was dull

The shits all have very short legs.

Rylan to stay!

PLEASE let Rylan go.

It's enough that nanfucker is still in.

Fucking hell.

Rylan is huge-he looks like he's been 'scaled up' from a normal man

Why do they bother asking Louis and Nicole?