HORNED HOOFERS 2010

[SuSylvester]

ok as the summer seaons approaces, look at your wizened hobbit like hooves.

are they silky smooth with no cracked heels or discoloured toe nails? have you lumps and bumps on your to joints?
ITs time to sort it out you scummy lot.

i find moisturiser makes fake tan slide and streak.I scrub with one of those scrunchie things and the when throroughly dry i use latex gloves and rub it on everywhere.Only use st tropez.once its dry before bed I put body lotion on and then shower in teh morning.Am a pasty ginger so well practised.i bumped into a friend today who had done it last night and she had used a new l'oreal one which she said was tinted and it was the best colour and cover I've seen in a while.

Happibu, psoriasis on my fingers has made the nails go curled and pointy, shudder.

Flexitol - check

Foot file - check

Other foot cream stuff - check

Cling film - check

DH to take the piss all night - check

I have hooves of satanic hideousness. I am leaving the fake tannery for the mo, saw my friend at the weekend and she was orange. She looks ridiculous.

I also need to colour my hair but have had a poorly velcro baby, awaiting her recovery and then I'll be able to sit around with a carrier bag on my head (super-thick and long hair needs containing whilst colouring).

So bring on summer.

lol (whispers to Ja jas) me to but htought everyone would think i am scummy

feet not horny but completely unable to see the point in fake tan
all around here are orange

Ha - I may have ugly hobbit like feet but at least I dont have to fake tan [preen] Just need to get these feet into semi-showable state. Will try the flexitol. Pedi-egg has had a nervous breakdown on being faced with my feet..

Have never used fake tan and am too s cared to try. I use that moisturiser that ever so gradually turns you a slight golden shade. Must start it up again.

yes that is good.

Does the tinted moisturiser leave orangy patches on dry areas too? I'm even too scared to try that, although I have several bottles in the cupboard.

oh come on lili
do it after school kind of time then wash before bed
or if its just the tinted body cream it will be fine

Chippy, yes, please do!
Fishie, I've seen that and i do like it although not exactly the shade i had in mind.
I also don't think I could ever bring myself to part with £19 for a bottle of nail varnish when i have had perfectly servicable ones for less than a fiver.

I don't really like fake tan but a tip someone passed on once on MN was to use a mitt (ie no places for fingers)and that really helps.
Also on same theme, don;t really hold with expensive unguents and so on but bought cheap Botanics Moisturising Sugar Scrub (£5-6?) and it is fantastic. However, quite oily so you need an extra scrubber/llofah for it. Legs and feet gleam after use.

the dds got me some of that soap and glory body scrub for my b'dAY. It rubs you raw and smells DELICIOUS. Brown sugar and lemomgrass or something

Can i join in?

I have one foot that is perfect in its loveliness and the other is a horror show.

I have a verruca, possible athlete's foot and a fungal nail infection, but i'm breastfeeding so can't take the pills that work. i have been using tea tree oil on it, but doesn't seem to be working. Any tips?

can't you use creams and powders for the verrucas and the athlete's?

can you buy assymetrical shoes? I'm thinking of phil oakey's hair in the 80s

Yes the verruca and athlete's foot shouldn't be a problem, it's just the fungal nail that is a big problem. Iam thinking i might need false toenails or something if I am going to be able to wear any sandals this summer.

Boots have got buy two feet products get second half price.
Includes flexitol and pedi-egg etc
go go go go peeps, and get purchasing
(where are the posters who come on this thread and claim we are shallow and judgemental?)

Go to the doctors maybe and get the paint on stuff

what is pedi-egg? will be at boots on thurs eve.

I don't think there's much you can do fungal wise without the tablets.

I don't think you can even use the paint on stuff when you are bfing Noddy. I looked at it when i was pregnant and def coudn't use it then, but I'll go back and check.

Su, ever since you coined the phrase "horned hoofer" I just get this urge to shout "oi you horned hoofer, sort 'em aaaaht" everytime I see bad, bad feet.

As for mine, they've had their first nail colour this year (can't expose them with no colour) and legs have had one coat of Johnsons Holiday Skin, just to take away the snowblindness effect. Heels fine at the mo but will have Flexitol at the ready.

ped egg

eurgghh! A grater that holds all your sloughed foot-bits

Trixy, tea tree oil painted on neat twice a day does work.
I had hideous fungal nail on hand when last breastfeeding adn did so after taking all manner of things to get rid.