Any advise on how to look older when I'm in my early 40s ?

[MomWithChinHairs]

That maybe the 1st time someone asked this on here. 🤣 But I fall into the proaging rabit hole. Even my husband wants me to look older as that is what he's into now.

Let me give you some of the stuff I'm working with:
● My natural hair color is dark brown. I'm rocking a pixie cut that's dyed blonde.

● Unless it's a special occasion, I have abandoned dresses, jeans, and skirts. I wear leggings for my fluctuating weight. I were tank tops because of hot flashes, night sweats, and other sweating events.

● Stop wearing makeup.

So ladies, help me age up. 🤣
Obviously not in a ridiculous way as I'm not going to start smoking nor doing hour long tans in the sun. Don't kill me but help me older. Love you guys. 💙

Maybe I'm doing this wrong. I thought what I was doing is embracing aging. Maybe I was just kidding myself.

How weird.

Dye your hair grey. Shop at White Stuff and FitFlop. Question your choice of husband.

My DH is 16 years older than me. I dont want to look 16 years older (or any older!)
Day to day i dont wear make up, if im going out I'm just try to look like the best version of myself I can, I dont really think about trying to look a different age...although its flattering if people think I look younger (i imagine they are mostly being polite)

Everything starts going downhill post-45 anyway, so give it a year or two…

https://www.theguardian.com/science/article/2024/aug/14/scientists-find-humans-age-dramatically-in-two-bursts-at-44-then-60-aging-not-slow-and-steady

Do you mean you would like to look more elegant and put together?

Changing hair always quickest way for a new look.

I think we are going to need a photo ?

Why look older? Just look like you.

Although, I do read on Mumsnet that floral dresses with denim jackets and white trainers are terribly out of fashion, so maybe try them? 😀

Don’t know if this helps, I am 70 and at the moment wearing velvet leggings/trousers, a monsoon shirt/tunic and a cardigan. I just wear what I want but obviously not mini skirts or low cut tops. Be comfortable and wear what you want, not what your husband thinks. My hair is a shoulder length Bob, easy to maintain. But people tell me I look younger than I am!

Do you think your DH is trying to say you should dress your age and a bit more sophisticated ie leggings and blonde pixie are too young for you? Or does he seriously want you to dress older than your age ie like a retiree.

Well, I already look like I'm in my 40s.

I apologize to everyone for asking this question.

Maybe you need to teach me what it means to truly embrace aging. Because I thought that that was what I was doing. But I guess it was just another version of me trying to impress men.

Stick to what you are wearing. I’ve never heard anything so ridiculous. But a flanelette nightie and tell him that’s what older women wear.

What does that look like? Women in their 50s and 60s vary enormously in their appearance, for various reasons.
What kind of look is your DH thinking of?
Is he aiming to look 70?

Do you mean more classy and put together?

You’re nuts 🤣

Embracing aging is just embracing the age you are. You’re in your 40s, you say you look like you’re in your 40s - that’s pretty much the definition of embracing aging, so I don’t think you’re doing it wrong!

I think I'd be working on those issues before I'd be concerned about appearing older. See the Doctor for acne treatment & remove the chin hair daily.

You're right. I'm sorry.

I guessed I overreacted about my looks, again.

@MomWithChinHairs I wonder if this site would give some idea of direction for you?

You could look at the women there, of your age, and see if any of them inspire "the look" that you're imagining?

Is it because he looks older than you? Or is he a lot older than you? Is he worried you'll leave him for someone who looks more the same age us you? Is he jealous that you look younger than him?
Most men like to be with someone who looks younger than them.
I would never dress for someone else. I wear what I want, how I want.
At 40 why on earth would you want to look like you're in your 50s or 60s????!!!

I'm 66 and have no chin hairs. However, a bad chest infection seemed to age me overnight, but I really don't recommend that route.
Perhaps come off the internet, and speak to someone about your issues.

I find it strange that you want to look older but each to their own... I think what ages a person is an outdated haircut, frumpy clothes and shoes, Hayley cropper from Corrie had the dated look is that what you're going for then go for the Hayley look ( in real life she looks great)

You wanna something, you helped in a weird way. I might already look older. I have as much facial wrinkles as Jennifer Garner and she's 53. 🤣

Maybe I'm already successfully at looking older. 🤣

My husband and I are the same age but he looks way younger than me.

Sadly social media images of women adding modern day filters before posting perfect pictures have given vulnerable women the idea they are all natural beauties. This is without adding all the various cosmetic procedures on trend now. The biggest beauty enhancement is a smile along with a decision to stop comparing yourself to those you see as more attractive. Natural beauty's of all ages do exist and the happiest of them don't act or think they are anything special.