MNet Newbie Guide - what would be your top piece advice on Mumsnet etiquette?

[JustineMumsnet]

We wanted to put together a humourous yet telling guide for Mumsnet newbies, full of practical advice on how to get along in Mumsnet land.

You know the type of things...

Opening posts/ nicknames/ topics to avoid until you get the hang of it. Or don't post on AIBU if you don't want to hear that you are? Or please don't use textspeak/do use punctuation and paragraphs/ don't call people Hun.

Many many thanks. We'll bung it altogether one day soon.

Thank you in advance oh kind and good Mumsnetters.

This is so funny, reading this then looking at Active Convos and seeing all the transgressions right there!

dont have a nickname with numbers in its unoriginal to be called pinkfluff123

dont go on a thread with " is this still going on, i am bored" hide the fucking thread.

if you want to post something delicate, post it in chat, it goes away whereas aibu stays around ( its not obvious to those who don't know)

dont start a thread becuase you are being ignored

you aren't being ignored, you are just boring.

dont start a thread accusing everyone of having a clique, there are cliques - join one, make one or get over it.

If you concur, it's 'Hear hear' not 'here here'.

Is this thread still going?

No, doesn't look like it. Probably scared the newbs off - hell, even I'm scared by you lot. Full of yourselves, aren't you? (grin)

Don't use text speak. Presumably you are using a proper keyboard and it doesn't take much longer to write 'before', 'your' and 'to' than b4 ur and 2.

There are an awful lot of us put off even reading your post if it is full of textspeak and one of those people could have the advice you need.

God are we now forcibly molding the n00bs into shape before letting them loose on the boards? God forbid a fresh way of doing things squeaks through.

Step away from the MN cliches ladies.

If you have a young baby choose a nickname and password you can type with one hand easily, that way you can mumsnet and feed your baby at the same time.
ideal!