A frank word about norks. If there were a sex/body image topic I would post there.

[wickerman]

So I am in my late 30s with two kids. I am separated and in some need of a good seeing to.
My issue is this. Norks.
I breastfed for two years each, as well as a stay in hospital using a massive, farm stylee milking machine. My once fabulous high enormous norks are now deflated, sorry and flaccid.
I can pass muster in a bra, but, oh, my, once it's off, I fear I may cause the most jaunty of erections to subside.
DO men care as much as we do about the droopiness of our norks? Is it better to jauntily discard one's bra and say nothing? To forewarn? Or to keep one's bra on until things are on a firm footing as it were?

I would welcome comments from men as well as women who have surmounted this issue without either surgery or resignation to a life of celibacy.

CHEERS IA

x

I will watch with interest

If I were single, this would be a big issue for me too

Sorry, no advice for you

IMO men are just so pleased about doing the deed they dont care!

I am conscious of mine too and DP muttered something about them being beautiful last time I discarded my bra.

If a man is so shallow as to care I would be kicking him to the kerb anyway. .

Oh and don't prewarn - that would be weird, a turn off and make you seem self conscious which is not sexy.

I had a man pre-warn me once that he was hairy - it put me off him - not because he was hairy but because he was self conscious.

So say nothing and enjoy yourself

make sure you are always horizontal ??

horizontal is the WORST
on top surely better?

I find mine look best lying down with arms above my head - so maybe get him to tie you up

DP says(verbatim) "leave the bra until the last moment to avoid what is known as a disappointing disrobing."

Sorry, probably not what you wanted to hear!

there's a PHRASE for it
you see that is what I am scared of
being someone's "disappointing disrobing"
even if it makes them shallow
I don't want to be that to someone

I am pretty confident in bed
BUT
I think having once had killer norks and now having......yeh

It IS making me self conscious

do you have fantastic tits then giddy ?

Far from it.

Makes you think, doesn't it.

As everyone else has said, it's a confidence thing. I say do whatever makes you feel least self-conscious and then your self-confidence will be a big turn on.

Keep the bra on until you feel comfortable.

Thank god I'm (happily) shacked up. My tits are ace and would stand up to even the most scrupulous of critics but my stomach is my hang up. The mere thought of exposing that sexually to anyone other than DH (who is a) contractually obliged to find me attractive and b) helped to feck up my midriff in the first place) makes me want to shrivel up like a well salted slug

Just buy some fantastic underwear, take control and leave bra on until you feel comfortable?

never heard that phrase before

Mine aren't too bad, but DH has been known to lift my arms above my head frequently. So I think Monkey's tip is a good one.

What about wearing a bustier or something that you can keep on the first time.

This would be an issue for me too if I were not married. I have had always had nork issues but now after 3 babies they are really only knee warmers.

Wear a bra that gives you plenty of cleavage. Thats what I we like.

It would'nt, in fact doesnt bother me or turn me off as you sound quite similar to my DW.

Pity really I could have helped with the seeing too bit.....

but how does that actually work in practise?
Most men, seeing that I am well endowed, get quite exercised about seeing them.
Do I slap their wrist and turn it into a saucy, benny hill style game?
Do I push them down sternly and say no no no?
Do I cast off my bra and jiggle what is left of them with effrontery?
It's really getting to me.
Where is solid when I need her?

SOLLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID
come and tell me something empowering.

wickerman - know exactly how you feel. I had a rather nice pair of pert size C cups pre son. Many years on, and a combination of breastfeeding and losing a bit of weight all over (including the boobs) I am now an A/B cup. I would actually be pleased if they were pert but small, but sadly no, they are like an old woman's boobs (Im only early 30s). In fact, a male friend (who i think meant well) said recently that I had a fantastic figure (fortunately my waist and hips go in and out at the right places and my bum is pretty firm thanks to jogging!) but it would be 'perfect' if I had bigger norks. I'm fine with a bra, but, if I were single, I would feel seriously bad.

Husband says they are beautiful but they are obviously so much less attractive than a full, pert pair. Help.

Just occurred to me how often DH puts my hands above my head we'll be having words

Seriously though post children most of us have hang ups - I've got no stretchmarks and decent norks but am carrying more pounds than I care to think about but have a flabby stomach and wider hips.

That's not a known phrase - don't worry.

Do NOT prewarn! That makes them expect to see something bad whereas they might not have thought anything was wrong with them otherwise!

Oh god, worse than the stomach exposure is the paranoia over badly packed kebab post vaginal birth fanjo

Mortifying

If I ever end up single again I will be having a full cosmetic surgery workup in prepareation

preparation

If your that bothered get on top and dangle them in his eyes.. I swear he wont notice at all

Yeah, don't pre-warn. V embarrassing for all parties, I think