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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

2 My 14 year old daughter has made a statement to the police that my husband has been inappropriatley touching her and making s

293 replies

hurtandworried · 21/02/2009 02:13

what happened there??

OP posts:
Original poster
hurtandworried · 21/02/2009 04:03

no lesson i found it quite traumatic, but howould you understand that eh?

OP posts:
Molesworth · 21/02/2009 04:04

To be fair if it weren't for lesson's input on this thread you probably wouldn't be aware of the (possible) mishandling of your dd's case HAW, however unpleasant you have found her manner.

Ultimately we have no way of knowing who you are or whether you are genuine - such is the nature of internet forums like this.

As others have said I think it's worth giving the benefit of the doubt because other people in your or your dd's situation may well read this and gain some useful support from it, if nothing else.

Original poster
hurtandworried · 21/02/2009 04:07

yes moles i understand that but i offered y number, police name, sw name for lesson to check out but still took the piss, not nice, not necessary and very unpleasant in the circumstances

OP posts:
Molesworth · 21/02/2009 04:10

Well in my opinion you shouldn't worry about proving anything to any of us; just worry about supporting your dd and getting sound professional advice to help you to do that. Very best of luck and I hope you contact one of those organisations tomorrow. I think it would be wise to talk it over with a trained person before the arranged meeting on Monday so you are as well informed as possible.

lessonlearned · 21/02/2009 04:10

I'm qualified to recognise trauma, and to address it FWIW.
I've no evidence to suggest that I have missed a therapeutic process here!

Original poster
hurtandworried · 21/02/2009 04:12

obviously not lesson, a trauma is not the same as traumatic, look in dictionary smart arse
are you on here all day and all night because you have no family or friends? have you fucked up that much??

OP posts:
Original poster
hurtandworried · 21/02/2009 04:13

yes moles i will be doing that

OP posts:
Molesworth · 21/02/2009 04:15

you certainly give as good as you get, don't you?!

Actually the fact that lesson has bothered to give her professional insight into this scenario at such an ungodly hour points towards her being a caring person rather than a shit-stirrer or point-scorer.

lessonlearned · 21/02/2009 04:16

NO,OP Ihave to call you on that!!!!
You never told us the names/ numbers of the professionals involved!!!!
If you had I would recommend further action and followed it up!!!!!

Original poster
hurtandworried · 21/02/2009 04:17

yes moles, lesson has really pissed me off with the snidey comments all night, do you really think f i wasnt going through this i would be sat here now?

OP posts:
Original poster
hurtandworried · 21/02/2009 04:18

i never told publiclily lesson, scroll up and youll find i offered them to you personally because of your very obvious skills and expertise in this area

OP posts:
lessonlearned · 21/02/2009 04:19

Well, I'm lost for words. That;s not something you hear from a trained counsellor very often!!!

Original poster
hurtandworried · 21/02/2009 04:21

what you on about now lesson????

OP posts:
lessonlearned · 21/02/2009 04:26

You can rest assured OP, if I scroll up tomorrow and find the names/numbers of the professionals you claim to be acting wilfully in the face of the Lamming Report - for the memory of Victoria Climbie - I will be reporting them - and following it up!!!
NO right minded individual involved in safeguarding would do anything else!!!

Original poster
hurtandworried · 21/02/2009 04:28

no lesson, read what i put, i did NOT write any names here, i offered to give you the names privately, whch im suer if you are dilligent you will find my statement doing that

OP posts:
lessonlearned · 21/02/2009 04:32

I will as a matter of course call you on that information, OP!
I am commited to following the legislation that followed from Victoria and all the children who were failed by the system. If this includes your DD, then ALL THE BETTER!!!!

Original poster
hurtandworried · 21/02/2009 04:34

please do smart arse, i look forward to it

OP posts:
lessonlearned · 21/02/2009 04:37

I feel so sorry for your DD and all the lovely mn posters that gave you their time and energy!

Original poster
hurtandworried · 21/02/2009 04:39

i feel more sorry for you lesson, i have a valid reason for not sleeping and trawling the web all night, whats yors???

OP posts:
Original poster
hurtandworried · 21/02/2009 04:42

goodnight lonely, hope you get a life one day

OP posts:
lessonlearned · 21/02/2009 04:47

On the hunt for evidence on Safeguarding issues, trump that if you dare!!!
Did I mention Victoria Climbie?????
I happen to be committed to the integrated working proceedures from ECM, and when I come up against situations that could be concluded very well with integrated multi agency protocols, I am honour bound to point out any misuse of the system!!!!

lessonlearned · 21/02/2009 04:51

OP my children are sleeping soundly. ARE YOURS????

Flightattendant27 · 21/02/2009 05:46

Well I'm not sure any more.

Firstly OP being up nd on here all night, since 2pm yesterday...no breaks for anything...

and she does post like a bloke.

Not a clue, sorry.

Have posted very much to support OP already so now it's time to step back I think.

If this was't genuine I shall be extremely angry.

warthog · 21/02/2009 07:45

WTF???

hurtandworried, can you cat lesson some details so she can follow it up?

lesson, can you back off the aggression?

ssd · 21/02/2009 08:04

seems to me the op is more worried how this will pan out for HER(??), not for her DD

something here bothers me, who is trolling, the abuser?does sound like it to me, too much self interest in a lot of the op's posts

hope I'm totally wrong, awful scenario if I'm right