There We Are Then - part 4, but episode 278946, probably.

[mummy917]

For anyone who is still offering messages of hope, wisdom and general loveliness 🥰

I would clarify with the wraparound care if he’s adding the bill to the “family” ie your account or has set up his own account.

If the former I would sort it out with the care that he couldn’t do that and ask him to reimburse you (good luck with that, he will plead poverty but add it to your list).

I wonder how long it will take for him to realise that the inconvenience and cost of 50/50 isn’t worth it for him?

Surely having 4 kids 50/50 isn’t cheaper than paying maintenance?

That’s exactly what I’ve been wondering. The last few days must surely have been a wake up call. He’s now finding mummy917 less amenable and less compliant, his in-laws obdurate and his mother not a particularly staunch member of team Twattress.
Stone the crows, he’s having to juggle, deprioritise his wants, spend money on his children, actually single-handedly parent 24/7! Poor lamb must be frazzled!

Have I missed a new thread being started @mummy917
I really hope you are doing ok. Fellow twin mum here so I know how hard it can be.

Hope you’re doing ok @mummy917

I'm always happy when there are no posts cos it means she's doing well

I fully agree with you @Doggymummar .

I think this is a fine example of how Mumsnet used to be. Supporting someone through one of the worst times in their life and then, gradually, they post less and less, showing that they are getting there on their own. It’s been lovely to lurk on!

I agree with this and the occasional supportive posts will let Mummy917 know that she still has support here whenever she might need it.

I believe Mummy917 will be back as sadly it is still early days, twat only moved out towards the end of June and we are just into Oct - so it's just over 3 months.
The Courts have a 20 week cooling off period so ' we ' are not that far yet and there are still several steps in the divorce process to get through.
( and I can't remember when the divorce was applied for ) but say it was 1st July - that would bring Mummy917 up to Nov 18th at the earliest.

Mummy917 did say there is a date for something - I can't remember what and sadly it is the day before / the day after their Wedding anniversary so I guess around that time will not be good days for her as previously happy memories may come flooding back.

I am sure ' we ' will be here for Mummy917 when she returns.

Sorry it’s been a very hectic week and a half as my daughter turned 5 and I’ve been working as much as possible around having the kids.

I applied for the divorce in July and we will sign the conditional order on 25th November which is the day after our wedding anniversary. Now it’s October the thought “we sign the first part of the divorce next month” has been going round in my head quite a bit too, so that’s made me a bit wobbly too.

Other than that, everything is going well and I have been trying to enjoy the time I have by myself. I don’t have the kids this weekend so I’m going to have a weekend of housework and relaxing. I still can’t say how much I appreciate all of the check ins, it really is lovely 🥰

Well, you know, we worry! Hope the birthday was an absolutely wonderful day 💖

I know and it’s lovely and very comforting 🥰 she had a great day and we will be having a little tea party next weekend when they’re back with me 😊