There We Are Then - part 4, but episode 278946, probably.

[mummy917]

For anyone who is still offering messages of hope, wisdom and general loveliness 🥰

Morning OP, thanks for the new thread!

it will drive him mad that he’s effectively handed you back so much free time. We know you’d prefer to be spending it with the kids, but he doesn’t.

Very good point

That’s the saddest thing though isn’t it - that he is spending more time with his DC to spite OP, not because he wants to, and recognises the honour and privilege it is that he is their father. He doesn’t deserve them, and they sure as hell deserve much better than him. Luckily they have you OP!

These children are so lucky they have OP, they’ll grow up knowing they have Mum who absolutely puts them first in every decision she makes.

Hopefully over time things will settle down with Twattoo and he adjusts better to active parenthood, he’s very much at the learning curve stage at the moment. It’s all very much a shock to the system because I don’t think his new life has turned out how he thought it would at all. He’s also very angry and bitter because deep down he must know he’s fucked up but there is literally nothing he can do about it now.

I would be cautious about allowing him to think that there you are seeing someone. It’s fun to fantasise about winding him up but in reality when men like him realise you have moved on they can increase the abuse. Also when you do meet someone lovely it is none of his business.

👏
or scentsy do a fragrance that smells like a chaps aftershave. I popped one in the diffuser and everyone who came in complemented my DH on his fragrance 😂 I had to stop using it, it was leather and something…

Yes I have some aftershave wax melts good idea

With a new dress, make up and some pretty new (costume) jewellry…

How brave of him

.

Any chance you live near an airport? Start renting out your drive so a random car is there on a Friday morning and when he arrives 2 hours early and asks if it belongs to a man you can confidently answer 'if you'd brought them back at the agreed time this wouldn't be an issue' and watch him turn all the colours of the rainbow. Even better that there will be a different one there the following week and he thinks you're doing better from the split (in his eyes by the only comparator that matters, how much interest you're getting from the opposite sex!) than he is!

But be selective about the types of cars you allow on your drive. If the car is new and desirable maybe even allow them to park for free 😂

He's the shitty gift which keeps on giving. I think not answering his question was exactly the correct response. It'll drive him wild not knowing what you've been up to. You rock!

Nothing to add other than you're amazing and he constantly reveals new layers as to the utter shit he is.

It's fine for him to sow his wild oats, but you are absolutely expected to remain chaste and weep next to his photo each night. I agree with a PP that he would use any suggestion of a new partner as a stick to beat you with, though the indifference and seeing him steaming must have been a treat 😁

Lisa Eldridge in a meeting the ex video said a new blusher combined with some highlighter will give you an 'in love' glow and someone like Twatoo will drive himself mad trying to figure out what looks different about you

😂

Fun as it might sound I agree with some other posters that it's not a good idea to play games around having a pretend lover and likely make him even more abusive and less co-operative than he already is. Give away as little about your life as possible.

Thanks for the new thread @mummy917

I'm loving all these ideas. Especially the XL condoms 😂

I'd definitely have flowers left on the doorstep when he drops the kids off and say 'oh are these from you?' Tinkly laugh 'No, of course they're not' 😂

Keep going op x

Keep thriving in the new school year!

Buying yourself flowers is a great idea anyway - not to piss him off but because you deserve to treat yourself to nice things. Miley Cyrus said so.

I agree. It’s so tempting to have revenge or try and teach them a lesson. However the best response is grey rock to him and a life well lived without him.

Keep your focus on having fun time with your friends, and the DCs friends and family. The DC will inevitably chat about a visible fulfilled family social life that contrasts with his dumping the DC on Grandma. Have the DC friends around for pizza to celebrate the start of term, ir a treasure hunt around the house/ park, invite the birthday girl (whose party was missed) around with her Mum and have a mini party as your DD missed that party.

It’s not your job to teach him a lesson or show him what he missed. He won’t take a lesson from you anyway. But in time your thriving will give him regret, not that he will ever acknowledge it.

Love these suggestions. Especially inviting the girl whose party was missed. Your DCs will know by your actions just how much you have their backs.

I reckon you should have a new woman in your life... not a man... Exploring your options... that'd definitely get right up his nose...

👀😂

Ok, so….im sure some people will think it’s tacky and manipulative BUT I loved a jilly cooper when I was younger (still do!) and around ten years ago now I pulled a ‘man who made husbands jealous’ job on an ex I still really pined for who dropped me for another woman.

It worked really well, but by that point the work i’d put in to myself meant I didn’t want him back anymore! Rejected he turned into a right spiteful little thing. So it’s true you can get them extremely riled up with the flower delivery method, but unless you potentially want more grief, maybe don’t!