The Dating Thread 62 - They'll be FALLing for you 💖💕💘

[Nosdacariad]

The Rules:
-The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating
-Develop a thick skin
-Do not invest emotionally too soon
-It’s all BS until it actually happens
-Trust your gut instinct
-People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault
-Know your worth
-If it's not fun, stop
-Loo update is mandatory
-No dating the thread
-Treat others as you'd like to be treated
-Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with
-The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future
If you're wondering if you're being too picky/should give another chance after the second chance/should try harder - the answer is invariably NO! You're not and you shouldn't. If this, now, is as good as it's going to get, the A game, then do you want what comes next?!
-OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item*

@Nosdacariad@TheThingOnTheIceSorry but I agree :(

@TheThingOnTheIce @Thiswillbefun I love you both and I had a moment of boredom-induced madness 💐💐💐

No, no, no and no!! Put that idea away in a little box, stamp on it and then catapult it into the bin 😂

@Nosdacariad honestly I get it I really do , it’s coming up to a year since I split with Mr Pervert . Every now and again I get the urge to text him but I know it won’t make me feel any better and will only make things worse . Currently we have the upper hand. Don’t give it back to those low life men who lost out on us .

If you don’t mind me asking how long has everyone been on the apps and do you find it a slog? I’m jumping back in soon after a break I was on for about a year beforehand and had a couple of short term things (couple of months) but no long term potentials.

NOPE

@empirebiscuits12 @TheThingOnTheIce @CleanShirt thank you. I appreciate and love you all 😘😘😘

@AlwaysCarrieSATC it is a slog and I've been on and off since Christmas (minus two months). I have 16 chats on the go and maybe 1 or 2 will be a date.

@Nosdacariad well you always seem positive and keep going … all good things ahead for us all 🤞 xx

@AlwaysCarrieSATCI have only been on the apps for a few weeks. My plan is to use it to meet people quickly. So far 2 duds :) Good luck!

Does anyone have a list of things to avoid/essential. I think I get to the date and get overcome with excitement and can't think clearly 🤣

I don't always feel positive but I think if it gets too much I'll have a break x

Have you read the first post with rules? 😘

@Nosdacariadyes I mean more own home, own car I don't know some black and white rules. I think that is just wishful thinking 🤣

These are yours to decide.

Maybe keep them simple and don't gaslight yourself into ignoring them at first snog (like I've done!).

Here's some of mine

💙Has a job
💜Not racist/sexist/homophobic/Reform supporter
🧡Has car and drives (I'm rural)
💜Is not very recently out of a relationship (I glossed over that with Planes - 1 month)
💙Does not have super close female friends (Planes conned me there, totally underplayed his harem)
💜 Life does not revolve around booze (I glossed over that with Beered, Planes conned me!).

@NosdacariadI love your list. To be held to account here mine will be :)

Has a job which uses his brain
Has a car and willing to meet halfway for a date
Has had a LTR and if he has any children they are over 18 (my youngest has just turned 18)
Is in touch with emotions/able to communicate on a deeper level
No alcohol on date 1!!

On better news the man I was due to meet on Friday wanted to remain 'friends' and now still wants to see me :) He ticks all these boxes and I am driving to meet him!!

Good news.

Will you communicate no alcohol on date one in advance (or did you mean no alcohol for you?).

My friend made me make a list of non negotiables. There were 16.

MrX scored 2.5. Planes scored 3 😅

Eta watch out Mr Box Ticker is not trying to manouevre you into a FWB thing unless that's what you're happy with x

@NosdacariadOh dear they aren't high scores! Let's call today Mr Dog! He would have scored 0 and Mr Planner (Fri) will score 5. The place we are meeting at on Fri is somewhere we will both need to drive to :)

16 chats?!!! How do you keep track? 😂 I can’t have any more than 2 or 3 because I forget what I’ve already spoken about with them and I’d end up all confuddled!

Amazing though, 16 guys! 🤩

@empirebiscuits12I get mine in a muddle and their life stories. Maybe I need to start a book of notes 🤣

@empirebiscuits12 tbf I should have blocked most of them and I'm matching their effort, so it's notalot!

@Nosdacariad This!

You deserve to go to the gig with someone worthy of your company! ❤️

@NosdacariadBurning hay stack method :) Get rid of them and swipe some more :)

Things seem to be going well with Mr Smile so far... taking it a bit slower this time round & I'm pretty happy with it. We're both off the apps although he still has his relationship status openly single on fb which I'm planning on asking him about... I made it clear last weekend that I'm not an option or back up plan. I'm cautiously optimistic.

I've not heard from Mr Spa since last Saturday so haven't had to let him know I won't be seeing him again - he was a strange one as we got on so well & he seemed really interested, however I'm also kind of relieved that I've not had to explain myself.

I'm still following along on everyone's updates. Such a fab & supportive group of women on here ❤️

@Mildred007That is such news :) Taking things things slow sounds like a really good plan

Good news @Mildred007 😁 definitely discuss his fb status.

Planes "hadn't thought about it" when asked. Possible but unlikely since he managed to change it to single previously.