Partner said I’ve let my self go

[Mommy2onexxx]

Today my partner picked me up from work we have been together for 5 ish years , he’s been so cold towards me recently and kept commenting on my looks , I kinda shrugged the comments off like an idiot , anyways today when I got in the car I asked him why he is being so horrible I explained he is making me feel small and unworthy , he said this is because I’ve let my self go and I don’t glam up the way I used to do my hair and makeup everyday ect , I explained I simply do not have the time the way I used to when I was 18 19 , I work , I’m a mom I run a home and I’m working towards my level 4 qualification, he said I should make time , I know he does truly find me ugly now I can just tell I see him searching other women he is so sharp and snappy with me and he is out all the time . I think what I’m looking for here is someone to tell me that it’s okay to loose your way abit I just feel so heartbroken

It's funny how "looking after oneself" involves makeup and complicated hairstyles only for women and never for men, isn't it?

Going barefaced with a ponytail isn't the same as not showering or becoming unfit. Yet OP's "D"P is complaining about the former. When women complain about men not looking after themselves, we mean that they're not showering.

🎉 Get in!

Mine got like this with me years ago - turns out he was having an affair - too weak to break it off with me, he became nasty hoping I’d be the one to take the step.

Absolutely unacceptable. This is emotional abuse & you know this is not how you want to be treated. Is he thinking about how he has let kindness go? (If there was any to begin with). If treating you nicely is conditional on what you look like, you know fine rightly that's an asshole but maybe you need us to remind you. Seriously, what woman wants to be treated like this? Who writes on their list of traits they'd like from a partner "withholds decency if I don't glam up". You said it yourself, you feel heartbroken. Love doesn't hurt. This is abuse. Please lose that prick.

It is abuse. Emotional abuse.

I really hope that when the time is right you meet a man who truly loves you and you will know the difference straight away. Best wishes OP with your future. I have been married and went on to meet a wonderful man.