Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Update - Divorce is in sight from sulking exh!

191 replies

jamaisjedors · 12/12/2023 16:36

I posted a thread on mumsnet 5 years ago 😵and received amazing support from posters on here - couldn't have got through this without you all😘

Now the judge has finally come back with a verdict and she has ruled that we are divorced (no fault[ and rejected all of exh's claims of fraud etc. financially. She has made one ruling financially which is not particularly in my favour, and also reduced maintenance again but that's the price to pay for my freedom!

I had a nerve-wracking couple of weeks waiting to find out if exh was going to contest the decision, which would mean another 2 years of court and back and forth, but miraculously he has signed the paperwork accepting it and so have I, which means we all but divorced - just waiting for the official paperwork and update to marriage certificate etc to go through.

We also have to go back to a solicitor's to finalise the financial agreement, which I'm hoping will happen in the next month or so, so by early 2024, everything should be done and dusted.

I should be breaking out the champagne but it's a weird kind of anti-climax, still bits to tie up, still got to see exh again at the solicitor's, still in contact with my lawyer etc.

Plus I think after a rollercoaster 5 years I don't think I can let my guard down yet, I've had so many setbacks and delays.

I didn't want to jinx it by posting too early but my lawyer assures me that there is no going back on the divorce now, so it's finally time to share the news and thank everyone again for their amazing support.

Previous thread here: https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/4125147-Divorcing-sulking-DH-it-WILL-happen-in-2021?reply=130620438

OP posts:
IncompleteSenten · 14/12/2023 12:09

finally!! Bloody hell you poor sod.

If you'd killed him instead you'd have been out sooner than this 😉

IHateLegDay · 14/12/2023 12:39

So so wonderful to hear!! I've been following since the beginning and have been keeping my fingers crossed for you! Hopefully you'll be able to put it all behind you before long.

BooBooBaloo · 16/12/2023 19:58

Amazing news, I've been following your threads since the start and can't believe it has been 5 years 😱

Marylou62 · 18/12/2023 09:24

I've followed (mostly silently) since your first ever post and I'm so very pleased for you. The love you have for your 2 boys has shown through every post and I'm wishing you all a Happy Christmas and a New Year that will bring closure after such a difficult 5!! years. May your future be as stress free as possible! x

bigdecisionstomake · 20/12/2023 10:55

I've been following your threads silently since the beginning and am in awe of your patience, resilience, fortitude and dignity. You are an inspiration to all women facing a traumatic divorce.

Celebrate this Christmas like you've never celebrated before - huge congratulations!

jamaisjedors · 20/12/2023 21:15

Thank you so much everyone for the lovely messages and encouragement and also wise advice (as always!).

The plan for NYE is to spend it quietly with Mr DJ to reflect and move into a new year, and then I seem to have invited a lot of people to drop in on the 1st Jan for a drink or some nibbles or whatever so will be starting the new year and a new life and marking they occasion without actually having a "divorce" party.

Happy to have an online mn one though when the actual piece of paper finally arrives!

Now busy househunting for next summer when ds2 finishes school, so onwards and upwards 🤩🎉🥂🤗😘

OP posts:
SissySpacekAteMyHamster · 21/12/2023 01:56

Aww so happy to see this, I followed your original threads(ssss) and am glad to see an end in sight.

Have a lovely Christmas.

Inca22 · 21/12/2023 17:29

@jamaisjedors Huge congratulations!! Can I ask what you were hoping from the financial settlement vs what you got? I'm nearly there too and I have no idea what a judge my rule on the financials

FredaFox · 23/12/2023 08:31

Fantastic news!!!
Now you can enjoy Christmas and your new life
So happy for you

LizzieSiddal · 23/12/2023 08:35

You sound so Happy! So very pleased for you! Flowers

AcrossthePond55 · 23/12/2023 15:12

@jamaisjedors

Before the Christmas madness begins in earnest, I want to wish you and yours a wonderful and peaceful day, full of love and light. 🎄🎅🏼🧑🏼‍🎄

And here's to a Happy New Year!🥂🥂

MsRosley · 23/12/2023 17:30

OP, I am reading your first thread and realising you are describing very similar issues to my marriage.

Indifferentchickenwings · 23/12/2023 22:52

Omg
i remember your first thread and reading it when I was splitting with my ex in late 2019

5 years ago , Jesus that’s a long time !
heres to 2024 x

RachelGreeneGreep · 26/12/2023 19:55

So happy for you, have been on your threads since the first one. Fantastic news! 🎉🎊🍾

SundayShawl · 10/01/2024 19:13

Congratulations Jamais! I've been following your threads from the beginning and I'm so pleased that you're finally in sight of the finish line.

rosie0000 · 11/01/2024 05:30

Congratulations Jamais! I have been with you in spirit since your very first thread and rejoined Musmset to add my voice to those of your many supporters.
Happy New Year, 2024 will be such a great year for you! 🥰

AnxiousPangolin · 11/01/2024 07:13

Great news, congratulations! I followed all your previous threads so I know it’s been a long time coming.

Ormside · 11/01/2024 07:22

You are amazing. How you haven't lost your mind is beyond me. I shudder to think what all this has cost financially, but so glad the finishing line is now in sight.

jamaisjedors · 11/03/2024 11:57

Extra update seeing as I got mentioned on the "Posters you still think of thread" 😮by @Trickabrick

2024 is going to be a great year! Mr DJ and I are buying a flat and going to sign a civil partnership (PACS in France[, the official divorce paperwork has come through, the kids are doing great.

Still can't get over how far I have come and how much I needed mumsnet throughout the whole ordeal.

You are all the best!👊

OP posts:
HalebiHabibti · 11/03/2024 12:00

Amazing OP! I am so pleased for you. I can't believe it has taken what, half a decade to get to this point?!

Melstarrynight · 11/03/2024 12:00

That's such lovely news. You deserve to be happy. 😊

DPotter · 11/03/2024 12:01

Congratulations for both the divorce and the Civil Partnership !!! Flowers Wine

shockeditellyou · 11/03/2024 12:03

Hooray! Another one who thinks of you often. Well done.

neednicerpants · 11/03/2024 12:08

Congratulations! You deserve every happiness! 🎉🎉🎉

AngelontopoftheTree · 11/03/2024 12:17

Wonderful news @jamaisjedors 👏 😀
Wishing you a lifetime of happiness with Mr DJ ✨️
I hope you got what you wanted in the divorce.

Swipe left for the next trending thread