My brothers wife smashed a glass in his face last night!

[ROSEgarden]

due to his wife, we havent spoken in almost 3 years, she hates the realitionship we had, so had his hands tied behind his back with bribery(money!) and he made his descision..he took the money, left me!

i hear through my mum their relationship is not a good one and recently he asked my mum what to do..

early this morn, my mum rings, brother is in hospital been transfered from his local one as she threw(dont know how a throw can be THAT accurate?) a glass at his face..hes been in all night, had xrays etc and is now going into surgery at 2pm.
Ive rang him at hosp, after all regardless of what shes done to me hes still my brother and must be quite scared right now..he may lsoe the site in one of his eyes, he has to have invasive surgery to remove the glass..his biggest fear is hospital and eyes(used to wind him up by touching my eyeball as kids)..i asked practical things like were is car(so it didnt get clamped if at hosp) and what his work number was(so i could let them know whats happend), if he needed anything and told him regardless, im here for him if he ever needs me.

he's not a timid fellow so i know there could have been more to all this, but the fact is, hes in hosp and may lose his site because of this crazy, lunatic..but because ive been out of 'the loop' for 3 years i dont know what else i can do..im at work right now but have asked my mum to go buy him some comfy clothes(shorts t-shirt undies etc) for when she goes up when hes out of surgery..but i dont know what i can do?

they have two children who are with her i guess, hes worried if my mum says anything to her shell keep them away, but said thats it with her now so god knows what else has been happening?

by dp is impartial as he knows what my brother put me through and then chose her and disowned me so thinks im mad to be concerned and crazy when i said i would go see him at my mams(hes asked if he can stay with her when he gets out)

Things dont just wash away and im still very hurt but i see this now as the important thing, cant forget but have to move on(proably get kicked down again by him, hes like that)but i just want to do the right thing and let him know if will be ok...dont even know what im asking here, just cant talk to anyone in RL cos they either say im mad, they saw it coming or something..just needed to get it down i think..god families

..thanks chick, i will, its my birfday this weekend, so will hopefully have nice night out sat and nice day with dp and dd sunday..although carpet and sofa are arriving imminently, so i guess ill be buying paint/sandpaper etc sunday and spending my two days off decorating|!!..your right about the get out f jail free card(your phrases are cool)..he must think cos i went straight up to hosp that all is well

ooooh well happy birthday for this weekend x it's my birthday on tuesday so am gonna have a nice meal out with my dp and mum....no brother lol x

thanks chick, and Happy Birthday to you too for tues, how funny so close together..we're out for meal then drinks tomorrow night, mum babysitting but already making me feel guilty cos she has to put brothrs eye drops in every two hours and obv ill be out longer than that(he cant do it himself as he cant 'feel' when his eye is open its still that swollen..so i feel a bit crap for asking her to babysit now, but i hav e literally no one else

don't let her make you feel guilty...he has a mirror....sorry if that sounds harsh, but the world cant grind to a halt because of him. You have a good night, if i was anywhere near you i would babysit the kids

Aw bless ya..thanks chick..am waiting for friend to pick up old sofas at min then can start getting dd sorted, get ready then dd bath and bed before mam gets ere!..what night off!?..oh and mum rang me and said brother wants to know what perfume you like, i said ive told you tis not neccesary..we'll see!

think that you are being very wise...perfume does not rectify the situation thefore will probably not smell as nice ...well im doing very little tonight, getting the kids ready for bed then havin a couple of beers x have a lovely night x

Hi Everyone who's helped me here..just a quick and small update..brother been back to hosp today, theyre pleased with the way its healing(swelling etc) and have allowed him to applly for his driving licence back(dont know what that would involve?), he has had his eye drops reduced although the pain killers are still high on the agenda! and he's been reffered to another area to see someone about damage to the back of his eye???
unless he gets another infection in it while its still on the mend they WONT have to remove it(small mercy!) but will still need lots of treatment..so looking positive on that front, but still no news regarding HER? i know he saw them Sunday(the kids) and the card he sent me for my birthday said(brother and kids names only) but dont spode that means and awful lot?

Anyway, i sadi id keep you all updated, thankyou all soo soo much for helping me out these past weeks what with everything going on at home too i was so lucky to have you lot to help me sort things out in my head.xxx

Thanks for the update Rose, glad to hear the news is quite positive about your brother.

I guess that he is complete turmoil atthe moment and still taking each day as it comes. Hopefully he will do the right thing regarding HER!

Take care.

X

I don't get how she can have tricked him into believing that the kids would go into care if she went to jail. They've still got a Dad. Surely he must know that millions of kids are brought up by single parents, and they're not all SAHMS living on benefits?

If he needs to be at work, wouldn't a good childminder be a better option than their violent and untrustworthy Mum?

And if he doesn't live with her and the kids do, then presumably she will need to make similar arrangements anyway? Or does he think he will have to support her to stay at home? Doesn't work like that.

Does he think all the kids whose Mums have escaped from violent partners get taken into care? There wouldn't be enough foster homes to go around.

He seems to be still in shock- not surprising- but somebody ought to advise him.

Hi PIndy, i hope so too..think it may all start the ball rolling now!

KM no, theres no sight at all and theyve ruled out there ever being any as its so badly damaged, theyve said unless he gets another infection in the bad eye(whihc in turn would effect the good eye) they woul leave it were it is, but have to get someone else to look at the back of the eye so see more clearly what else happend there(his eye was pushed right back inside the socket)

Cory, she is the most manipulative person ive eevr come across, she will have beens aying things like if she went to prison, he would have to have the children, but then he couldnt work, so he couldnt pay bills and children would be taken off him..and so on..brother although an adult, after many years of her emotional and verbal(and now physical) abuse, will believe her!..as it happens, I am a childminder, so he would be sorted there..but that would be oevr her dead body!

im hoping now he knows whats happening eye wise, that he is able to push things forward with this, mym mum told him yesterday she would be very dissapointed in him if he let her get away with this and its not setting a good example to their children, we've told him till we're blue in the face that shes lying and making things up..but shes 'conditioned' him to believe her..so im just going to have to keep everything crossed he finds his balls along with his common sense!!