Tongue Erection?! Has anyone else experienced this bizarreness!

[Surelythiscannotbeathing]

Had a date. It was ok. Was a bit unsure whether to give it a second date. but he asked for a snog at the end, so I did, never know, that might have clinched the second date deal.

And, I kid you not, we kissed a bit then he pulled away and waited there with his tongue stuck out full length rigid from his lips. Just sticking out there, hard and stiff, like a tongue erection. I have no idea why or what he expected me to do??! Then he kissed me again for a bit, then pulled away and did the whole weird tongue erection thing again. Just hanging out there, like a stiff board. Why???

At this point dear reader, I made my excuses and left, never to see him again.

I have never experienced anything like it. It was a really big fat tongue too. Gross.

Has anyone else have a guy do this?!?

There really is no end to men's weirdness 🤢

Shoulda sat on his face

Me too! Put me right off him.

My first thought 😂😂😂

this is utterly vile but also has improved my day thank you
I suspect he wanted you to be so overcome with passion that you would lustfully suck it

I’ve kissed a few frogs. And some lizardy kissers. Only one did this but it was unexpectedly and rarely during sex, probably after a year or so in, not a first date. It was still gross. But if he’s cracking that out now I’d be concerned how much tongue weirdness he’s got saved for later.

I had worse on the bus once. Couple sat in front of me and the bloke was sucking and tonguing his girlfriend's nose!!!! You could hear my involuntary "URGHH" in the next county apparently

Jesus christ 😂

I bet his friends and family are all like
I have no idea why Dave is still single, he's such a nice guy.

They have no idea about his tongue erections.

What? You think I was the other party and am now defending myself on mumsnet? 😂 Anyway, sounds like you’re the insecure given your touchy reply to a silly joke!

Can you ask him what he was expecting and let us know please?

That made me feel a bit sick, well done OP.

My ex would occasionally form a suction seal on my mouth and suck all the air out of my lungs while we were kissing. It was deeply disturbing but he found it hilariously funny.

If we had missionary sex he would also form a funnel with his tongue so all his excessive saliva would be channeled into my mouth. Not sure if that was on purpose or if he just got carried away and forgot we were kissing but it was deeply unpleasant and would result in my panicked shouting "swallow your spit!".

I can't remember the last time I had a snog and this thread is making me glad!

I had a very inexperienced one night stand with a guy who snogged like this. No tongue action beyond sticking it into my mouth like a stick. But this was 35 years ago.

No I think you are a man who can't cope with women laughing at men. Your first post suggested it. Your next confirmed it.

I am sneakily on Mumsnet at work and this has me giggling 😂

My God!

Ick

Currently sat here practicing my Tongue Erection 👅 Weirdest. Thing. Ever!! Will you see him again OP? Please do just to ask wtf!

Who is this even enjoyable for!!

What would go through your head to even do this!!

🤢🤢

😲😂😂😂

If we had missionary sex he would also form a funnel with his tongue so all his excessive saliva would be channeled into my mouth

^

Jesus Christ

This is the funniest thread for ages. I’ve tried it, Googled it and laughed at all the comments. Tongue boner 🤣🤣🤣

Thanks a lot. I'm not keen on men at the best of times but this has just really done my head in. I'd have run away screaming.

@CornedBeef451 just when I thought I’d heard the worst - ‘swallow your spit’ frankly he’s lucky you didn’t vomit in his mouth, bleurghhhh

that is hilarious and grotesque in equal measure 😂

And yes, I did just try it at my desk

Was his name Jamesie?