Dating thread 225: Roses are red, violets are blue

[ButterflyOfShay]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

@Stayingstrongish I would stay away. If what you have with ex works now re childcare, there’s no sense doing anything that might rock the boat. Just say you’re busy, send a nice card but don’t engage.

@Stayingstrongish

Speaking of exes… a question about mine… he wants me to meet him for lunch on his birthday (it’s a big birthday). He has said a number of nasty things to me since he left but now says he wants to be friends. I’m leaning toward telling him ‘thanks but no thanks’ and saying I only want to discuss arrangements for the kids from now on, not do social things. Curious about whether any of you would go for a lunch with an ex who had said highly hurtful things? He always tries to imply I’m over sensitive.

Big fat no, why put yourself in that position

Thank you everyone for your thoughts on the lunch. Think I will just politely leave him to it!

Another Thing to get used to
Having hot sex with morally ambiguous men

How does average sex with boring old men sound?

I’m not going to lie @HowlongWillThisTakeNow, that doesn’t sound great 😂. Think I might prefer a cup of tea.

HowlongWillThisTakeNow
Have you name changed again !? I recognise gush voice
And define ‘old’

@Thisisworsethananticpated
Not had a recent name change, used to use cumudgeonly007.

5 and 2 , FiftyTwo

What’s a gush voice?

Curmudgeonly , aha that’s you
Meant to say that voice
Error

Maybe this will be an interesting read for the hot-sex-with-the-morally-ambiguous feeling anguished crew, or just those that are kicking their heels

nautil.us/love-is-biological-bribery-14058/

[quote HairyArsedMan]Maybe this will be an interesting read for the hot-sex-with-the-morally-ambiguous feeling anguished crew, or just those that are kicking their heels

nautil.us/love-is-biological-bribery-14058/[/quote]
Heels are being kicked

5 and 2 , FiftyTwo
That’s not old
I’m heading that way scarily soon

It feels like it sometimes, especially after I’ve done 5 or 10 miles on my push bike, get home, legs are like jelly, lungs are burning and can hardly make the stairs the following day.

I accidentally pocket dialled my Baltic ghost when deleting his contact , that’s great ! NOT

So sent a ‘assume not happening , take care
Of yourself message’ and he hasn’t replied to that either

Oh well , there can be no doubt now
NEXT

@HowlongWillThisTakeNow

*Another Thing to get used to Having hot sex with morally ambiguous men*

How does average sex with boring old men sound?

Stop lumping anyone in their 50s into some sad old person's club. I'm 55, but have better nights out than many young 'uns I know who have progressed to pipe and slippers in their 30s or 40s. And I've had some damn hot sex in my 50s too. Stop it!

@HowlongWillThisTakeNow

It feels like it sometimes, especially after I’ve done 5 or 10 miles on my push bike, get home, legs are like jelly, lungs are burning and can hardly make the stairs the following day.

Aha! It's the exercise making you feel old. Easy! Stop exercising 😊

To be fair, when I was seeing ms W last year, she kept coming back for more, so must have been doing something right !
In fact she keeps trying to get to go and visit, and she another person with horses !

Well mr sparky managed to send one message, on apps not text (presumably from someone else’s phone?) last night to say he had lost his phone while out on Friday. But nothing else since and has been offline since too, which would make sense if he’s phoneless but how long does it take to replace one 😤

ihavetogoshoppingnow
I was wondering about him

Well he’s either lost his phone for real
Or he’s a flake

HowlongWillThisTakeNow
Your crushing it ! So no need for the old auld man moaning

@Thisisworsethananticpated I keep going back on forth on which one!

I hate being cynical but we’ve all experienced people going to extremes when it comes to old but at the same time until he went offline on Friday night there wasn’t a single red flag so I had no reason not to trust him. So if he comes back properly I’ll wearily give him a chance and if not then the whole thing was just fucking weird

Either he’s telling the truth @ihavetogoshoppingnow or it’s a second phone. Time will tell… hope it’s the former for you…

@ButterflyOfShay yeah it’s either one or the other isn’t it I guess. I’d rather trust than be cynical so we’ll see but we chatted for a week before we met and messaged all day till midnight most days with no hours of time missing that would imply a girlfriend/false life etc

[quote HowlongWillThisTakeNow]@Thisisworsethananticpated
Not had a recent name change, used to use cumudgeonly007.

5 and 2 , FiftyTwo

What’s a gush voice?[/quote]
Oh wow I totally hadn't realised it was you, Curmudgeonly! I thought you were just one of numerous new folks to join the thread Nice to know you're still here!

Myself, I'm lying low here as I have literally nothing happening on the dating front. I think I'll take a break for quite a while (if I can resist the temptation to peek on the apps) - got too much else to focus my time on. But am following along and cheering you all from the sidelines.

Hi everyone, so what happens when you turn 60?Does it all come to a crashing halt! I really hope not as have had some great sex in last decade. Certainly did not feel old at 52 @HowlongWillThisTakeNow

@ihavetogoshoppingnow

Well mr sparky managed to send one message, on apps not text (presumably from someone else’s phone?) last night to say he had lost his phone while out on Friday. But nothing else since and has been offline since too, which would make sense if he’s phoneless but how long does it take to replace one 😤

Not necessarily a phone, plenty of apps you can log in online on a PC.

And while it only take a few minutes to buy a phone, it does take two days to transfer your number, ages to set up plus get might have lost your number in the change over.