Catching my husband cheating?

[dontpointatme]

I can go into the back story later if needed, I just need to know if I need to get this set up quickly…

In a nutshell, I'm 99% certain my "D"H is up to something. I've found out from the wife of his friend that he cheated a while ago and he's been behaving so suspiciously recently that I'm sure he's up to something again. I'm not kicking him out though until I have proof, as he'd just go for the wounded party thing, and I'm not having that. He denies everything when confronted.

So, he's away apparently visiting a friend this weekend... I can't follow him to see where he goes as I have commitments that I can't get out of, so my (psycho wife) idea is to send my old phone with a PAYG sim hidden in in his car, so I can see where he (or at least his car) actually is...

Forget the rights and wrongs, will this work to track him assuming the phone is on silent and Bluetooth etc turned off so the car doesn't link to the phone? Am I completely insane?

I don't think you're insane. Test it out first using the phone and see if you get the location data you're after. I honestly don't think you're insane at all - do whatcha gotta do. Own it.

Rights and wrongs aside - it will work.

Yes it should work and I don't think you're insane at all!

No. Do it.

Brilliant. Thanks all.

Going to investigate to see if there's an app I can use as a tracker that's any better than find my phone etc.

Can get a 2GB sim so that should be fine for the weekend.

So this could be second time caught cheating on you; 2nd you will know of, probably loads you don't.

Guess if you need proof then yeah do it but tbh if if you find out where he is he will still deny it and give you some bullshit story, you believe him before so he''ll expect you will this time.

Can you check bank statements for any hotel bookings?

Life360 is a great app- you won't need to track it continuously as it saves the path the phone takes!

We have separate accounts as well as the joint one, so could have used that. Paperless credit card statements that I wouldn't know how to get in to.

I can't access his phone as it's glued to him, and he's likely changed the passcode from last time I knew it as I've questioned him recently about some stuff. This is my last hurrah I think.

I've only just found out about the last time, which apparently was on a night out months ago.

Ooh @willowtree28 that's perfect! Thank you

Do it, and be sure to screenshot the locations when you ping it. Also pick a discrete hiding place, under the boot lining or some such.

100% something i would do!!! But i do hope it turns out that he isn't.
Good luck xx

I think it's an excellent idea

If you have an iphone it will save significant locations under the 'system services' section in the privacy/location services settings.

Would it not be better to get a dedicated tracking device?

Do it. And if it's found that he's cheating again take time to plan how and when you tell him to ensure you get maximum squirm and make it as uncomfortable for the f*er as possible. Wish I'd taken the time to compose myself before I confronted my cheating ExH.

Good luck and stay strong xxx

Just make sure the volume is off!

Will the battery last with location on the whole time? Any power bank you could hook up but not sure how that would know when to start charging?

Oh yeah - definitely do it! Genius idea!!

Would it still track if he’s driving somewhere where it might lose signal or data connection? If he is.

Rights and wrongs aside I'd do it OP- life's too short to be wasted on people that cheat so I'd be keen to find out asap and end it; if that was the quickest way so be it.

You obviously don't trust him though and he's cheated anyway though so it's a little different. You don't actually need proof, it doesn't require his agreement for you to say "I know you cheated, I don't trust you anyway, the relationship is over". People like this will play the victim even with the proof they will just lie to others about it. Better just to stop giving him the power, laugh at him and move on! Look what he has you doing to yourself and the time he has you wasting and is he worth that. And I mean that supportively, I really do.

If he has an iPhone you can go into his iCloud account and select locate phone (i.e., it tells you where your phone is if you've lost it). Also does he have an iPad - may be connected to his phone in some way???

He has an android phone, and no iPad or similar.

I absolutely get why you'd just get rid of him now, but I need to find proof and do this for me. It's important to me that he knows I can prove it. I just feel I have to.

I don't dare do the android version of find my phone to see where he is as I don't know if something would pop up on his screen or not...

You can track using location on an android.

Disable volume and also disable vibrate. Also minimise the brightness and close every other app so that the battery doesn't run down too quickly. If you wanted, you could buy one of those battery power packs for mobiles (can pick them up anywhere) and connect that to it so it essentially has enough charge for at least a few days.