HOBBIT’S BAR – still finding it hard to move on…part 10

[bobs123]

Welcome to Hobbit’s Bar, owned by Hobbit, open to all and run by anyone who wants the job!

This is the place to come if your marriage/relationship has come to an end and you are struggling to come to terms with this. It is a place to vent, ask for advice, relate to others in the same situation, take a break and have a laugh, whatever.

There are people in this bar at all stages of separation – just separated, negotiating, mediation, court, divorced - and all reasons for this, whether it is abuse, general breakdown, financial worries, OW/OM involved, or coming to terms with a new life.

It is a place to come to for support. You are never obliged to give support to others or reply to any posts. It is ALWAYS okay to say SHIT THIS IS HARD and interrupt the giggles if you are having a tough time. No apology necessary. No one will have a go at you for what you are feeling and share on here. Divorce is a rollercoaster, we are all at different stages, so feel free to jump right in.

Some glossary terms:

1. Jess is our mascot. Owned by Hobbit, she might do requests if there are enough sausages in it for her. Sorry, she's been ousted by a pineapple in this 1st post, but sure she will feature if the lazy caaah gets off her...
2. Izzitinis are a revolting cocktail created by Izzie that only she drinks!
3. No 6’s are what we are/were married to, after Hobbit’s Twunts list. Some of us also have “pet” nicknames for our exes
4. KOKO – keep on keeping on (used a lot on here along with SHIT THIS IS HARD)
5. Ignore any exclamation marks posted by Izzie or Roz that might make their comments sounds a bit…dodgy. Something to do with their iPads having a mind of their own!
6. We all listen to WWK aka WellWhoKnew aka Mother who keeps us under control.
7. Random Guys feature on here too

Our theme tune is

My name is bobs, 55, married almost 23 years, 2 DDs 21 & 18 who have NC with their Dad. Nisi granted April 2014 on the basis of 2 year separation while living in the same house. Tried solicitors for over a year to sort out the financials, then mediation for 6 months which didn’t work, as due to his PA nature he is all but supine and unable to contribute. Sold our family home over a year ago and have been living in rental as he had the house proceeds frozen. He was then given a choice of accepting my proposal or going to arbitration or court. Still waiting…

Link to last thread here

Link to 1st thread - if you have a spare week or so and want to read the lot here

Toast I have just checked and in the terms and conditions you should have been sent when you instructed your solicitor, there will be a bit about complaints. Mine gives the name of the Managing Partner and also the name of the Compliance Solicitor should I have a problem.

Sounds like she's not on the ball! Perhaps too busy. You could either say something to make her buck up, or do you know of another sol you could use? This might help with the mediation stuff as well in knowing what to go for, what to accept and what not to - a new perspective?

haha Braving I think the question was - where are you going on holiday? Mind you, Zumba's fun - lots of wiggling your bum and shimmying and giggles

do we need to start a new top 10 on whos up in court next? just an idea so we can all get our pom poms out well done Tabby hope home

She's holding a boxing glove tabby my love, cause you gave your stbxh a punch in the kisser! Oh , and a cat tail, all that's left of the cat.....

I want toast now, and strawberry jam, will have to get out of bed for that though, don't know if I cba....

Thanks for the new thread. I'm glad our favourite fruit has made an appearance!. I hope jess'isn't too jealous??

I can't imagine coping anymore without this thread. or [bush]
bobs I actually think he's not coping too well. Reality is dawning. He's rung me and said he's en route home. He hasn't done that for months but it
was a nightly ritual for years and years. This is all so hard. I didn't engage and pretty much hung up. If he agreed to selling the house and pay the mortgage in the meantime them maybe it could work with me staying here. Situation is all pretty volatile to be honest. I want to go to sleep and wake up in six months when it's all over. Don't we all.....

frizzy Good to see you

Am here! Loving the header! Am going to get into so much trouble...!! Thanks for the picture on thread 9 bobs, I am pleased to say he is rather more skilled than that.... Loving MrsCrobinson though Hobbit...future namechange I think

Oh I see that now. I thought it was a snake and a santa willy warmer.

braving I love zumba as well !

I love that picture! It has made me snort in a contemptible manner unbecoming a laydeee.

Ha haha , tabby , how many have you had?
You have a very active imagination

Found this. Any resemblance?

Willy themed coz he's a dickhead. Makes perfect sense. Boxing glove is great too though.

Should have said resemblances to any of our recently departed or departing Hs. Maybe the specs in my case. Mick jagger lips do not apply though

Great thread Bobs thankyou.

Tabby delighted it went well for you. Must be such a relief. and more

[Blush] We're going to Tunisia, fancy hotel on the beach :)

Very nice! So you must be working extra hard at Zumba to be beach body fit

RMA

Strolls into bar. Trips on rug. Hits head. Ladies rush to aid. As you all have since day one. Hi gang. KOKO. xxx.

Not sure about beach body fit Bobs but i am trying to lose some more weight and to tone up a bit.

I've been doing Zumba for a while now and between that and the extra dog walking (H did most of the dog walking but feck all else) I'm feeling much fitter. I'm contemplating joining a gym !!

Good for you Braving suggest getting a couple of free sessions first to try it out! It gives me a laugh - especially when I can't do stuff!

Funny you should say that Bobs I've got a free day pass booked for tomorrow evening at a fancy country club I probably couldn't afford to join, I thought as I'm child free I'd spend some time in their pool and hot tub.

Oooh fancy country club DD1 took me to one for Mother's Day for a pamper session - facials etc. I found it quite cramped and busy compared to normal gyms in the pool area etc.

I did Zumba all last summer with DD2 as part of her Duke of Edinburgh Silver - we killed ourselves laughing at each other. I'm not an actual gym person, but that's probably where the fit guys hand out, flexing muscles etc. I prefer the classes

Hi drifted am liking the analogy. You do realise of course that we'd only rush to help coz it's your round

braving you don't do zumba at the mentioned club, do you?? You might be in my class!!