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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

I need to get laid

315 replies

fastdriver · 26/04/2013 14:37

That's it really.

I separated six months ago (after several sexless years). I was a faithful wife.

I don't want another relationship, I don't want to shag anyone else's man (either deliberately or inadvertently), I don't want to end up with genital herpes of anything similar.

I want a NS relationship that's mostly about sex (God I sound desperate Grin).

I'm fussy about men, don't like bald or shaved heads, beards, paunches or poor hygiene.

I'm 42 and reasonably attractive.

How do I make this happen? Most men are gagging for it, aren't they? It can't be that difficult but I don't know where to start...

Has anyone been in this situation or can give me any advice?

OP posts:
Original poster
fastdriver · 01/05/2013 13:07

Haha well Voice you are managing to derail this thread quite spectacularly so thanks for that.

You have actually made more of boy PMing me than I did... as did others on here. I think it's quite funny that he PMed me, it's not really that surprising (though it wasn't the point of starting a thread called 'I need to get laid'). I don't find it offensive either or blame him for taking a punt.

I'm also continuing to assume that you PMed me for a similar reason, Voice, albeit in a less overt honest fashion.

Or what did you think you were doing, defending my honour or something? Why did you need to message me privately about this? Have you got some self-imposed MN policeman role we don't know about? Well, it's OK thanks, I am quite capable of dealing with ininvited PMs, including yours.

you took it as I was accusing you of lying by so doing

Er, well you said to me 'Did he REALLY message you twice about hook ups?' and I said, 'yes, I wouldn't lie', not exactly an unreasonable response.

Also I don't dispute in any way that men have a right to be on MN. But I've got a bit of a penchant for alpha males myself rather than the sensitive types who make model train sets, bake quiches, post on Relationships and, perhaps, warn posters about predatory PMers ;)

So I suspect the MN man is not my kind of man, on the whole.

I'm off to climb a mountain

Good for you, boy. You are starting to sound a bit more my type ;)

OP posts:
Darkesteyes · 01/05/2013 13:11

I never get PMs from blokes on here. Id like to think its because im married but the realist in me tells me its because ive mentioned my weight and dress size

Not saying that i want PMs btw.

Cant believe the turn this thread has taken.

ItsYoniYappy · 01/05/2013 13:18

OO-er

fastcar he is still hung up on his ex. Sad

Is voiceofreason a single male too? I've only ever had one man PM me, but I didn't like it as he was married, I know there is nothing wrong with talking to married men but... well that's how stories get started.

I'm not surprised at Boy PMing you, I find it quite funny at least he's been quite honest about it all.

Original poster
fastdriver · 01/05/2013 13:20

Yeah but did you ever start a thread called 'I want to get laid', Darkest?

I didn't either, but I wrote on one a while back about having a sexless marriage and got PMs from guys then as well.

There may be a few shameless sexual opportunists guys on here who see it as a cheaper way to meet women than dating sites (?)

OP posts:
Original poster
fastdriver · 01/05/2013 13:22

I'm not surprised at Boy PMing you, I find it quite funny at least he's been quite honest about it all.

Well, quite. Gotta admire the guy in some ways. He's been sent off with a flea in his ear which wasn't my intention when I said I'd got a PM. I thought it was funny too.

I didn't out either of these PMers either.

OP posts:
ItsYoniYappy · 01/05/2013 13:42

boy I am sure you wont mind me sharing

He's kinda funny for being in his late forties! Is your hair grey Boy or have you used justformen? My Dad is in his late 60's and not all grey yet, everyone I meet has grey hair.

he is only 3 months out of a relationship though I think, if I had advanced searched anymore I would be stalking

Original poster
fastdriver · 01/05/2013 13:56

My biggest concern (aside from being happily married) is that you've spelt Ipanema wrong.

Haha someone said this on the previous thread but he still didn't change it. I'm glad it's not just me who thinks bad spelling is a dealbreaker it made me wonder if I was a bit of a weirdo

I'd say it's greyING Yoni. He sent me a link to his website and I've seen a pic but I guess I shouldn't post a link to that though it's very tempting

The previous thread confirms my suspicions: some men do come on MN to find women Shock

OP posts:
boyfromipinema · 01/05/2013 14:01

I reckon you're softening towards me now fast.
Anyway, it's greeting a bit, but not too bad as yet.
And you can probably see from the dating thread I started it was pretty tongue in cheek and I probably ended up sabotaging it by pissing about.
Ps
As tempted as you might be Fast please don't post link to my website.
I like to keep a cloak of anonymity like the rest of you. :-)

EmilyNugent · 01/05/2013 14:02

Sorry, fast but I think your behaviour on this thread is out of line. I can't speak about boy but voice is a decent guy and is on a lot of threads.

I get seriously pissed off with women doing the whole "men shouldn't be on here" type shit or permanently assuming any man here has an ulterior motive.

Loulybelle · 01/05/2013 14:04

I got pm'ed by a bloke from mumsnet Hmm

boyfromipinema · 01/05/2013 14:04

meant greying....not 'greeting'.
There, just when I was getting her onside I shoot myself in the foot again with my spelling. :-(

ItsYoniYappy · 01/05/2013 14:08

To be fair that isn't the only thread he on!

I have a martial arts instructor on Zoosk, he has sent me 5 messages, it wants me to pay £27 to unlock them.

AnyFucker · 01/05/2013 14:09

Yappy, are you saying that people in their late 40's can't be funny ? Hmm

< sticks up for boy >

< considers sticking him in my back pocket and touting him around for the highest bidder >

Original poster
fastdriver · 01/05/2013 14:10

MY behaviour, Emily? Wtf?

I haven't said men shouldn't be on here. I made a silly joke about chopping logs. I pointed out that I'd had two men PM me since I started this thread and both of them chose to out themselves, not my problem.

I did say that some men come on here to find women and I think it's probably true if you look at the earlier thread Yoni has posted a link to. But I am sure they are in a small minority.

I really don't understand why Voice sent me a PM, Emily. It doesn't make sense that it was to 'prevent derailing of the thread' based on what it said.

It was more like warning me to not trust boy and I wondered why would someone do that? I don't think it's anyone's place to privately warn someone about another poster. I dont' send unsolicited PMs myself but I would never have outed someone who'd sent one to me.

Don't worry boy I'd never post a link to your website or give out the details to anyone else.

OP posts:
ItsYoniYappy · 01/05/2013 14:10

YY FWIW I have seen VoiceofReason about a lot, I just didn't know he was a he.

There you go Lbelle ask and ye shall get! Grin

AnyFucker · 01/05/2013 14:12

I agree that men are welcome on MN. Except sexist twats, them that are here to tell us wimmin how we should be doing stuff and those that can't take a joke, they can feck orf.

I haven't seen any of the men on this thread doing any of that stuff.

ItsYoniYappy · 01/05/2013 14:12

AF I've got a cheek saying anything considering I'm 40 this year! I need to grow up. Soon

Tbh a few men on here don't have erm.. are a bit uptight, maybe that's just ones who PM me Grin

Original poster
fastdriver · 01/05/2013 14:12

excuse typos am on phone

OP posts:
EmilyNugent · 01/05/2013 14:17

Ah well, never mind, dear, you just stay in your little cocoon then. And yes, I find some of the things you've said bizarre and unfair.

Loulybelle · 01/05/2013 14:32

Yoni, i didnt even ask still talking to him them lol

Loulybelle · 01/05/2013 14:33

*though

StealthOfficialCrispTester · 01/05/2013 21:55

Hang around here on Nye. I had an exchange of pms with a guy who seemed quite keen. Well you know I do have a sexy username.

StealthOfficialCrispTester · 01/05/2013 21:56

I assume it was a guy. Could have been a frustrated spambot for all I know.

AnyFucker · 01/05/2013 22:06

It was me, stealth

I am so embarassed Blush

StealthOfficialCrispTester · 01/05/2013 22:09

Erm.......

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