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What phrases do you dislike from estate agents details...

194 replies

KitschinSynch · 22/08/2014 22:01

My pet hates are:
"this fine home" related to any Victorian house
"buff interior" buff meaning fit rather than the colour...
I will add more when they come to me :)

OP posts:
mateysmum · 22/08/2014 22:11

"Conveniently situated"

Usually means ...on a busy main road, next to a pub.

All depends on what you want to be convenient to I suppose.

KitschinSynch · 22/08/2014 22:15

Or near a public toilet maybe?

OP posts:
foxdongle · 22/08/2014 22:18

"Requires improvement" = You will spend all your time and money on it until you eventually sell it.

Restrainedrabbit · 22/08/2014 22:20

"Flexible accommodation" -usually means they have listed the house as a four bed but the fourth bedroom is accessed from the garage.

"Must be seen" - well yes clearly otherwise how else will you know whether to buy or not?!!!!

FuckyNell · 22/08/2014 22:21

'Sort after location' Grin

KitschinSynch · 22/08/2014 22:26
OP posts:
BirdsDoIt · 22/08/2014 22:30

'Deceptively spacious' - they mean it's small but looks big, I think - actually means it's spacious but doesn't look it...

JuanPotatoTwo · 22/08/2014 22:37

Requires some updating = total shit heap.
Has great potential = is in a right state.
Charming and quirky = dilapidated and falling down.

TheOriginalSteamingNit · 22/08/2014 22:37

'Comprising of'

OhBabyLilyMunster · 22/08/2014 22:38

Starting sentences with 'having'.... Ie 'having double sockets to hallway.'

AlpacaYourThings · 22/08/2014 22:39

"Well presented" - not for any particular reason, they just always use it if somewhere is decorated neutrally.

KitschinSynch · 22/08/2014 22:39

I actually have a bit of a problem with 'property' and 'home'. I would prefer 'house/flat/bungalow' but then I like things to be plain and factual.

OP posts:
OscarWinningActress · 22/08/2014 22:55

Our last house was a "handsome executive home". That's code for "lots of dead/unusable/environmentally un-friendly space and grandiose details thought up by someone with no taste and delusions of grandeur".

HowMuchMoreWee · 22/08/2014 22:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

noisytoys · 22/08/2014 23:03

Requires some modernisation - needs to be gutted and start again.

FrontForward · 22/08/2014 23:05

Tucked away location down a back alley with no access by car

FrontForward · 22/08/2014 23:07

glimpses of the river if you stand on a chair and crane your neck out if the tallest window

ballsballsballs · 22/08/2014 23:07

'Benefits from' something you'd expect as a matter of course, like a bathroom.

'Keenly priced' which means they overpriced it in the first place and the vendors are sick of not selling.

iamusuallybeingunreasonable · 22/08/2014 23:07

Potential for extension = pokey shithole

Bags of potential = shithole

scottishmummy · 22/08/2014 23:08

Do-er-upper= midden
Vibrant location=noisy

Franke · 22/08/2014 23:08

Light and airy.

FrontForward · 22/08/2014 23:09

a great opportunity to acquire = kid yourself you're getting a bargain because it's cheaper than the neighbours, but by the time you've finished doing it up you'll have spent way more than you should have

FrontForward · 22/08/2014 23:11

undergone modernisation but still managed to keep all of it's charactor and charm. Neither modern not traditional. Bit of a hotchpotch

Lucy61 · 22/08/2014 23:16

Vendor suited- does that mean a well turned out vendor?!

HaveYouTriedARewardChart · 22/08/2014 23:29

"Stunning" - the most over-used and inappropriately used word. Have been looking and can't find it but recently saw a garden described as stunning.... it was 20 feet of concrete surrounded by a cheap wooden fence. No plants, no greenery whatsoever. Some old clothes hanging from the fence. In the middle of a local authority estate.