In the process

[ohdoriswheresthesalad]

I've posted on another thread but didn't want to derail so made my own.

I've just taken the second lot of tablets internally and I am absolutely terrified of what's going to happen!

I've had no bleeding so far just cramps.
I can take some ibuprofen at 2.15 and codine at 4.15 again plus I feel really sick now but I'm not sure if that's my anxiety.

Is there anyone who's free to keep me company while I have to go through this, I literally am thinking all sorts, to I'm going to bleed to death to I'm going to see something horrendous when I pass something 😭

@borninthe80s THIS!!!!! This is the most difficult thing about this process; knowing who you can or can't tell. I am very close with my small team of colleagues, and anything else I would be honest and open with them - but one of the ladies is very open about how much she is struggling to conceive, so just imagine if I pipe up and say that it happened so easily, and that I'm choosing to terminate..😔 I honestly think this is the most mentally and emotionally challenging any women could ever go through!
I hope you have found MN as incredible as I have 💜

@ohdoriswheresthesalad medical science is amazing and it is so very very unlikely for anything "bad" to come of this. The nurse gave me the stats, they have to go through everything to cover their own backsides, but I can assure you we are all here to support you xxx

Oh god I think something is happening, the pain has come on and it's bad enough for me to take codine, dh is finding the hot water bottle out

I feel like I'm "leaking"

Red blood means fresh blood! So yes that is a good sign! Might indicate that something is happening as we speak! 💜

@ohdoriswheresthesalad this sounds really promising, I'm sorry this has been so drawn out for you but it sounds like you are in amazing hands. We are all here for you xx you will be fine xx

Seems like it’s starting to happen for you lovely. Make sure you’re keeping on top of pain relief and the hot water bottle will help too.
It will be all over soon, big hugs xx

@hillarypcof Sorry to the TMI, I don't know how else to describe it as never experienced anything like this before 💔

It's gone off a bit now but comes every few mins? Does that sound normal @bornninthe80s

How are you feeling @Elephants12345 💜

@ohdoriswheresthesalad it's not TMI at all! I'm sure you'll be getting the same levels of detail from me over the next 48 hours! 😂💜

Keep us posted OP xx

@Elephants12345 how are you feeling? 💜

Yes all sounds like what I went through. I had no gushes as such, but could feel the 'leaking' you mention. Get that hot water bottle out and don't worry if you feel pretty rotten for a couple of hours because it means it's finally working! We are here to see you through x

A lot better now thank you, definitely past the worst now and hopefully can start to move forward without the weight it’s had for the past few weeks ❤️ Found it one of the hardest things I’ve ever done which was to be expected. Husband has been amazing looking after me and our little ones today though. Surprisingly found the pain physically totally bearable which I wasn’t expecting.
Hope it’s all over with soon for you too, here for you to talk to if you need anyone ❤️ X

Thank you all of you, @hillarypcof @Elephants12345 @bornninthe80s @MsFrog you've all been so kind to me these last couple of days. 🍷 ☕️ 💐 🍪 🍫 for you all, whatever takes your fancy tonight!

It's ok having dh here but he doesn't know what it feels like, what happens bless him. He just came up and said what can I do, do you want me in here do you want me to leave do you want me to rub your back 😩

I'm so glad you're through the other side @Elephants12345, and @hillarypcof we'll be here for you tomorrow To help you through whatever you need 💜

Never did I think I'd be discussing bodily fluids coming out of me in such great detail 😂 god you have to laugh or you'd cry wouldn't you!

It seems to have stopped now?

It's all stopped now?

Good morning all 💜 awww @ohdoriswheresthesalad I am so happy we could all be here for you as a virtual hand-hold and moral support, I'm grateful to you all just the same! Today is the day for me 😩 I've woken up feeling a bit sicky, but I'm not sure if that's just nerves. Also having a little bit of cramping, but nothing I haven't had before. I will take the 4 tablets later this afternoon!

How are you feeling OP and how was your night? Peaceful I hope xx

Good morning @hillarypcof

Well I'm dry as a bone again 🤦🏽‍♀️ nothing has happened overnight. I really thought things were moving along last night but clearly this is not meant to be.

This is quite strange! Are bpas calling you in? X

Nope they don't want to know until 2pm tomorrow. She said as I'm bleeding it's a good sign but it's so on and off. She said phone back at 2 Saturday if you've passed no clots. @bornninthe80s

@ohdoriswheresthesalad @borninthe80s yes this does sound odd now, it's been what 3 days??
I know this is quite an old article but I've just read this which is quite interesting
academic.oup.com/humrep/article/19/7/1655/2356520

A study by some academics on the bleeding patterns post-EMA.

There must be a reason that BPAS are giving you until tomorrow, but I can totally understand how you're feeling, I am very impatient and if I were you I'd be phoning them demanding to be seen ASAP! You've given it a good amount of time, plus you know your body better than they do/anybody else!

Thank you @hillarypcof I'll have a read of that.

I just know in my heart that this hasn't worked.
I had a horrible thought last night that what if I'm a lot further along than what I think and cos they didn't scan me it's too big to come out or something?!
Or the first tablet didn't work and that's why the others haven't worked and why I'm still getting pregnancy symptoms?

As soon as I opened my eyes I'm nauseous, my boobs still hurt and feel like boulders.

I'm gonna have to give it until tomorrow like they said, hopefully some miracle will occur between now and 2pm tomorrow. Well I hope so as I'm back at work tomorrow evening!
Realistically I can't get to bpas for a scan until Thursday or Friday but if I have to have time off work tue or Wednesday then I have to i suppose.

Why am I still being sick 😭😭😭😭😭😭

I'm going to try ring bpas again I can't do this anymore
@hillarypcof @bornninthe80s

I've got a scan booked in for Wednesday that's the earliest they can do x

@ohdoriswheresthesalad I'm so pleased you've got a scan booked in. That's only the other side of the weekend, which is good. Could be worse! But I know the waiting game only gets harder and harder to play. We will all be here for you 💜 and you will get answers straight away at the scan xx

@hillarypcof I've had a little more bleeding but nothing major.

What time are you taking the next set of tablets? Xxx