Fresh Start thread for pregnancy after miscarriage or loss

[BertieBotts]

Welcome everyone :)

I am feeling much more positive today, how is everyone else?

@Paranormalbouquet good news. Take it easy and listen to your body.

@grumpysquirrel are you home now? Have you seen anyone about the breathlessness?

I fly home on Sunday. It's a lot better than it was - I'm not too worried. I'll go and see my GP when I'm back.

Glad you're out of surgery now, paranormal - definitely make sure you rest up! Presumably they felt it went well?

Ok grumpy. Probably just general pregnancy. Must admit i had a walk at lunch and was heavy breathing!

@unicorn great news and lovely pictures! Hope you can have a relaxing, anxiety free weekend :)

@para happy to hear you are out of surgery. Hope the recovery goes well

@mummyjl I am also enormous this time at 12 weeks. It is so hard to pick clothes for work. Comfortable but not showing too much and at the same time professional..... I’m sure some perceptive people have guessed or just think I suddenly put on a lot of stomach weight!

@para take it easy! Big surgery. Glad it went well.

@Paranormalbouquet pleased it’s done and you’re recovering. Now, try to ‘chill’ a bit. I hope everyone is waiting on you hand and foot!

@Unicorns so pleased everything is ok with baby!

Brilliant news @UnicornsandRainbows1! Get well soon @Paranormalbouquet.

Pleased to hear your surgery went well @Paranormalbouquet and here’s to a speedy recovery! When’s your next scan?

My nhs scan is on Friday next. I want to have it to make sure baby survived all of this, but have no idea how they’ll do it with the giant abdominal wound!

Sorry I’m still fairly dozy! They felt it went well, was a lot of scar tissue so even bigger wound than usual but was uncomplicated. Had a GA. Feeling pretty ok now, had a little dinner and have managed to walk around ward. Pain was terrible initially but improving already. Hope I can sleep tonight as I’m exhausted.

@Paranormalbouquet Hope you've managed to get some rest and feel a bit better today ❤

Pleased you’re feeling a bit better today @Paranormalbouquet
My 12wk scan is on Friday too! Fingers crossed they’re able to scan you ok with your wound! Hopefully we will both have good news on Friday 🤞🏻

Hope it’s not too late to join :-)

I am just going through the stages of MMC (happened last week) but I’d known things weren’t right for a while. It’s so reassuring to read about all you lot being pregnant after MC. I am keen to ttc again but very nervous.
I also feel like everyone is tiptoeing around me and not knowing what to say when actually I would just like some normality! I am obviously sad about losing the baby (10 weeks) but at the same time I feel some relief as I knew the pregnancy wasn’t right (baby measuring small etc). Before I felt like I was just waiting to Mc and now I have I can start to move on. Does that make me sound awful?
I don’t even know if this thread is for people who aren’t pregnant again yet but it’s just nice to hear it isn’t all doom and gloom after a MC.

Anyway sorry for rambling!

@Gratefulninja sorry for your loss. I think when things arent goimg right you just want it over and done with quickly because until it is there is always a little bit of hope theyve got it wrong but once it's over it's almost a relied or thats how i felt after both my mmc's.

If you are trying again there is a 'prequel' thread for this if you like for ttc so that might be worth a look but i agree its great seeing success stories. Wishing you lots of luck for your next one!

@DBoo yes I think so :-) but also I knew it was over before they confirmed it so I just wanted to move on and people telling me to stay positive made me want to scream! :-) thank you I will definitely look at that thread :-)

If it’s not a rude question would you mind sharing how long it took you to conceive after? I’ve been told there is no need to wait but that it may take months for my cycle to fix itself ?

@Gratefulninja Link is below if you need it :) It's full of lovely ladies and has been a great support system when a lot of us on here needed it after our mcs

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/3256408-ttc-after-miscarriage-thread-21-jks

I agree that sometimes you just want it over with asap to try and get a little bit of closure. People telling you 'it's just one of those things' or 'next time will be better' and all the other great completely shit pieces of advice just makes you want to punch them in the face. Or that was just me. But I hope our stories have helped you somewhat - I think when you've just have a mc, any positive milestone or stage just seems so distant and impossible to reach.

@Gratefulninja sorry for your loss x

The time it took each of us varies a lot. I know there are ladies who got pregnant next cycle but it took me 7 cycles after my MMC (even though it only took me 3 to get pregnant originally) and I got very down (unnecessarily so -- there was nothing wrong, I had all the tests and so did my DH, just took a while for hormones to settle I think). I had acupuncture which helped my cycles become more regular again; I was temping and the chart got smoother and more "textbook" as the months went by.

@Gratefulninja i only tried again after first mmc. I waited for af which returned like clockwork then was pregnant that cycle. Had an erpc for a second trimester mmc as well and again period came as normal 28 days later.

@Gratefulninja Oh! And in answer to your question, for dh and I, we've been on this journey since January/February last year. This one seems to be currently be our third time lucky.

We got very lucky actually, in a weird fucked up way. We had a mc in July, found the day before our 12 week scan. We tried again as soon as my body was ready after the d&c. Our second mc was November/December (found out in November, had surgery in December). I actually had the tiniest bit of retained tissue so really our mc finished end of January when I finally had a negative test (body was very sensitive to the hcg I had). Still had pregnancy hormones, thought I just don't care what happens to me anymore so tried anyway, and got a positive test the beginning of February. And here we are!

That was rather long winded. Sorry!

Not long winded at all :-) thank you :-) I’m hoping we are one of the lucky ones too but I guess time will tell :-)

So sorry for your loss @Gratefulninja. I came off the pill in February last year, and got a BFP on June 21st. At our 12 week scan in August, we found out there was no heartbeat. This was a huge shock, as we'd had an 8 week scan where all looked ok.

We started TTC as soon as the bleeding stopped (I had to have an ERPC as my body had been carrying our sleeping bean for 3 weeks with no signs of MC). Much to my surprise, I conceived more quickly the 2nd time round, and got a BFP in November! I'm now very nearly 33 weeks! I started using progesterone cream in early October, as I was getting symptoms of low progesterone (not diagnosed by a doctor, but they matched what I'd read online). I also never stopped taking folic acid and vitamin D, and we used pre-seed lubricant for DTD. Not sure if any of those helped, but I wanted to feel like I was 'doing something' if you know what I mean. Best of luck, and I really hope you get your sticky bean soon.

@gratefulninja sorry for your loss. It is a terrible time, and not made better by inane comments which people make.... although I do think most people just don’t know what to say, and say these things just to try and be comforting.

We started TTC last June and fell pregnant in the July. Had an MMC at 11 weeks in September and then fell pregnant again in November. Had another MMC at 8 weeks in January and then fell pregnant with this one in March. I have my 12 week scan on Wednesday and am petrified, although I have had a positive 9 week scan with this one.

Oh and the same as @flatwhite I have just kept taking folic acid and vitamins throughout