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Was anyone else at Snape Maltings today? Did Alan get his table?

538 replies

WonderfulSmith · 30/08/2025 22:31

Before I start I know it’s none of my business and I’m a bad person I’m sure but…

I was at Snape Maltings today which is a nice arts centre with a lovely shop selling all sorts of home wares and furniture. It’s very quiet and sedate.
Anyway, a woman started yelling at her husband. The whole place was pretending not to listen while giving each other looks. Turned out that he had ordered a perfectly innocent side table without talking to her about it first. She demanded that he cancel the order and he refused. He sat down on a sofa in the shop and she went and sat in the car. Every so often she’d come back and stick her head around the door, tell him the table was disgusting, and stomp back out.

When we left, Alan was still sat on the sofa. But I want to know how it ended. Are they still there now? Did Alan cancel the order?

Were any of you there?

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Pinkfluffypencilcase · 11/09/2025 02:38

FortuneFaded · 10/09/2025 23:42

I am disappointed in Alan. I was hoping to get a band to cover Michael Jackson’s Smooth Criminal, but with a little rewrite and the lines:

Alan, are you okay?
So, Alan, are you okay? Are you okay, Alan?
Alan, are you okay? (Alan, are you okay?)
So, Alan, are you okay? (Alan, are you okay?) Are you okay, Alan!

😂😂😂 this is too funny

WonderfulSmith · 02/01/2026 10:55

I remembered this thread the other day as we went to Snape and I looked for the table to take a picture, but it was gone. Did Alan get it? We might never know.

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inkymoose · 02/01/2026 14:53

WonderfulSmith · 02/01/2026 10:55

I remembered this thread the other day as we went to Snape and I looked for the table to take a picture, but it was gone. Did Alan get it? We might never know.

It's a lovely thread. Thank you for the reminder.

LlynTegid · 02/01/2026 14:58

When is the premiere of the play or film? We should be told!!

FortuneFaded · 03/01/2026 06:10

I wonder if Alan has been let loose on the sales!

Scarydinosaurs · 03/01/2026 06:17

I think it would make a great radio 4 drama

BeckyAMumsnet · 03/01/2026 09:23

Let Alan be immortalised in the annals of Mumsnet Classics...

BeaLola · 03/01/2026 14:42

I'm so glad you've reminded me of this thread

I'm probably having a "senior moment" but I'm sure I saw Snape Maltings referred to in a paper ref a Christmas concert ?

WonderfulSmith · 03/01/2026 14:45

BeckyAMumsnet · 03/01/2026 09:23

Let Alan be immortalised in the annals of Mumsnet Classics...

I’m sure Alan and Mrs Alan will would be thankful if they knew.

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WonderfulSmith · 03/01/2026 14:46

BeaLola · 03/01/2026 14:42

I'm so glad you've reminded me of this thread

I'm probably having a "senior moment" but I'm sure I saw Snape Maltings referred to in a paper ref a Christmas concert ?

You did. It is classical music venue mainly. There was a Christmas concert from there and BBC Two I think.

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BlueFlowerOwl · 03/01/2026 16:04

I wonder what Alan and Mrs Alan are doing right now…. Oblivious to this thread.
Thanks for adding it to classics, I missed it the first time round!

inkymoose · 05/01/2026 01:44

BeckyAMumsnet · 03/01/2026 09:23

Let Alan be immortalised in the annals of Mumsnet Classics...

Hurrah! ❤️

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