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Having my ears hoovered out tomorrow and I'm SO excited

316 replies

YvaineStormhold · 13/04/2016 19:28

How tragic are the middle years...

Can't bloody wait though.

OP posts:
PreemptiveSalvageEngineer · 15/04/2016 19:57

Aaaahhhhh.

TallPumpkinSpiceLatte · 15/04/2016 20:26

Bloom hearing offering ear wax removal on special offer at £25.... Just saying,
😗
www.bloomhearing.co.uk/en-gb/stores/south-west/saltash

YvaineStormhold · 15/04/2016 20:34

Go forth and get sucked, ladies!

OP posts:
veryproudvolleyballmum · 15/04/2016 20:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Poikjhvcx · 15/04/2016 20:40

Mmm, not sure if this is a genuine thread or a brilliant marketing ploy by The National Ear-Sucking Council 🤔

InformalMother · 15/04/2016 20:45

Loved this thread! Thank you ear lady Flowers

YvaineStormhold · 15/04/2016 20:47

I promise I have no interest in any ear-sucking companies.

OP posts:
IrenetheQuaint · 15/04/2016 20:49

Well, I wouldn't be surprised if you received some PMs from ear-sucking companies offering copy-writing work, OP Grin

yumyumpoppycat · 15/04/2016 20:55

urgh ear sucking companies!

yumyumpoppycat · 15/04/2016 20:58

whole new industries are going to emerge from this thread!

WhoTheFuckIsSimon · 15/04/2016 21:05

There is a bloom hearing in my town......sad thing is I don't feel blocked at the minute!

WhoTheFuckIsSimon · 15/04/2016 21:06

Also im not sure my local one does sucking, only talks about hearing aids.

NoBadassMcGee · 15/04/2016 21:06

Argh just accidentally googled ear sucking! Don't do that! Confused

guerre · 15/04/2016 21:24

Oh, I am so disappointed- my nearest one is about 70 miles away! Sad

BessieAndJim · 16/04/2016 00:28

A suggestive little song, positively dripping with innuendo, on (pretty much) this very subject....
m.youtube.com/watch?v=hUPwmh40PIk

PegsPigs · 16/04/2016 07:14

Bugger. There isn't one near me. Ah well I shall have to find another microsuction dealer! Cheers for the info.

SweetPeaPods · 16/04/2016 07:32

Pegspigs Google microsuction ear wax removal your town and it should bring some up.

YvaineStormhold · 16/04/2016 07:57

Bessie Grin Grin

OP posts:
GoofyIsACow · 16/04/2016 08:01

Truly amazing thread!

YourLeftElbow · 16/04/2016 08:09

Someone give OP a prize. Or a publishing deal

YvaineStormhold · 16/04/2016 08:12

YourLeftElbow Yes please...but I don't think there's much of a market for ear porn Grin

OP posts:
magratvonlipwig · 16/04/2016 09:41

OP Are you a writer? you should publish!
seriously that was amazing.
Much better than 50 shades of boredom !!

Actually dying for the loo but couldn't go till I'd read the whole story 😅

YvaineStormhold · 16/04/2016 09:48

If only, magrat

It's my dream.

I just live it on MN Grin

OP posts:
treacletoffee23 · 16/04/2016 10:37

Having mine done on the 25th. It's better than scratching an itch.... better than scratching an itch you didn't even know you had.Every three months ear Heaven Smile

IrenetheQuaint · 16/04/2016 10:41

Perhaps we should all club together and send you to a colonic irrigation session, OP, just so you could describe it for us afterwards.