Ode to Brian cox

[CockyPants]

Brian cox
You silver fox
You are dead fit
And don't talk shit
Unlike most men.....

Paul Hollywood you are fit too. And you bake cakes. What's not to like????

Oh Brian you look clammy
Your face all pale and spammy
Your voice is camp
I bet your handshake's damp

And all at once I sensed a crowd
A host of HillyWallabies

I cannot believe I actually wrote those very rude ones.

I didn't have a drop to drink last night either.

You lot are a really bad influence.

Oh Bono
King twat
With your enchanted hat
I write my ode to thee
At half past three
Due to my insomnia(y)

Oh Brian, your science is boring
In fact it has me snoring
I am not agog
I bet you dribble when you snog.

Bruce, oh Bruce
come kiss my lips
Willis, how I lust

for a very a deep thrust
of your lovely hips

extraneous a there - sorry.

I seem to have killed this thread.

No, you're just better and dirtier than anyone else and we're all reading in silent awe.

I don't much care for your tone, HillyWallaby, when referring to the god-like Brian Cox. Is there no ... respect left in the world?

Brian Cox, he is a bore, When he comes does he make a roar?

Eeeeew. Didn't want to think about that, ever.

Or his sex face.

Benedict, Benedict,
Dirty filthy beautiful man.
Do you know what pictures are in my head
When I imagine us in a swish hotel bed?

It's fit only for an adult channel.
It doesn't normally involve a flannel.
It does some acts incorporate
That I normally don't think are great.

But with you, oh oh oh! Benedict
I'd drop all my inhibitions.

Ah, yes, I see. Property grown up poetry.

I can't seem to progress beyond limericks.

Professor Brian Cox
Others might need entonox
To take you all the way
But I would let you stick it there
Without the aid of gas and air
Any day

LineRunner.

Hilly, no no no, you're better than anyone.

Do another. Please. Pleeeese.

I can't keep away from this thread! Love it.

Right...

Give me rough love Danny Dyer,
Show me all that COCKney fire.
Ragdoll me all over this room,
and do some thrusting to my womb.

(Not anatomically correct or actually very right at all)

So, so wrong.

Love it.

My mum would be so proud of me!

Erm....can't think.

Brian, oh Brian
I wouldn't be lyin'
If I said you were not my type
But these Mumsnetters love you
They asked me to tell you
They're in crotchless knickers on Skype
All waiting right now, in a row
Nipples tassled and ready to go
They'll put on a jolly good show
From fat to thin, they are gagging for sin
so tune in now Bri, be quick
Let the sight of their foofs
Rouse your dick
You are so lucky
They want to get mucky
Not me though - you make me feel sick.

Brian Cox PHD
I can't take you seriously
I see you got an OBE
from her majesty

Do you order them alphabetically?
B D E H O P?

Brian Cox BOPHED

Brian Cox HED BOP

BED HOP?