First Pregnancy Missed Miscarriage (Part 4)

[Kiki061190]

Hi ladies!

Our previous thread is now full so I’ve made a new one 😘

@MrsMGE Yummy yummy yummy! You’re defo making me want pasta! I fell asleep super early last night. Fatigue really has gotten to me! Woke up to boiler flashing low pressure! Hoping it’s something the other half can fix when he comes home later. Corona sounds lushhhh!

I also went off vodka @SunStruck! Haven’t drank it in so long. Must be a late twenties thing 😂

Hey @MrsMGE thank you. Unfortunately it’s getting worse every day. My husbands mum and partner are coming over for a bbq later and we’re going to tell them about the baby. I’ve not been able to do much. As beautiful as the weather is it makes me feel worse. I have anti sickness tablets but still a little scared to take. Apparently there’s a small risk of cleft palette and heart defects. We’re thinking we might wait until 8 weeks when the organs are formed a bit more.

@SunStruck thank you. The EPAU are happy for me to come back in two weeks for another reassurance scan even though everything looks good. I’m so pleased we don’t have long to wait to check in again.

You ladies are making me feel jealous about the drinking. I’d love a nice cocktail right now. I have to say I’ve not really been as into drinking since my mmc. I don’t think psychologically I completely came to turns with not being pregnant. There was just something that felt wrong about it. I used to love spirits but now the thought of vodka has made me feel ill. It’s interesting how pregnancy changes you. Have a few drinks for me! Xx

@Catconfusion @Kiki061190 Sorry girls, I'm so focused on food and drinks now, it's such a joy in my life 😂😂😂 Sorry for making you hungry/craving a nice cold cocktail/ill, totally unintentional!

@Catconfusion, I'm sure you've tried it all so I'm not going to rub the ginger biscuits suggestion in your face, which I'm sure would make your skin crawl! I did read about the BRAT diet and hyperemesis, I think it's American and apparently works for some women. How would you feel about that? I can't imagine what it's like to feel debilitatingly sick all the time, I certainly don't envy you. People tend to trivialise it if they haven't been through it. Xx

@MrsMGE 😂 don’t worry. I might make some virgin mojitos as I fancy some lime. I like to fantasise about food and drink even though there’s not much I can have at the moment. We tried pretty much everything with the first pregnancy and nothing worked. I’ll look up the BRAT diet as one of the few I haven’t tried. You’re right, a lot of people trivialise it. A friend of mine tried to make out she was the same with her pregnancies but she carried on working full time. I literally can’t get up. I know if I do I’ll vomit. Nausea is very common but being incapacitated isn’t. Don’t get me wrong I’m really grateful and I’m happy to feel like this but it’s hard to have a normal life. Also tough because we don’t want to tell friends yet. It means letting people down which I hate doing. I think if I’m still like this after the next scan I might start telling close friends. Xx

You know I only feel nauseous when I have an empty stomach @Catconfusion I have been feeling a tad off when eating at times but so far managing food without an issue really. Does make me worry about lack of symptoms! @sadtoday21 did you have any sickness or nausea? Also so sorry you are feeling sick! It’s the bank holiday as well so you just want to lay back and enjoy.

@MrsMGE Hahaha you are forgiven for feeding into the cravings! I have ginger biscuits just in case I do get sick but tbh I love biscuits of all kinds so I’ve been raiding that cupboard a little too much!

Hey everyone! Sorry I've been absent for a bit. Trying to keep off MN as I'm really anxious about my 12 week scan next week. It's so unbearably hot out! @MrsMGE and @SunStruck you guys are really making me crave lots of yummy summery drinks and snacks! Hope you both are well and that September is your month!!

@Kiki061190 I didn't have any sickness or nausea to speak of, certainly not like other ladies (@Catconfusion I am sorry that most people seem to trivialise it, I hadn't thought of it that way before you mentioned it as I mostly worry about lack of symptoms, but not being able to get up is serious and very difficult to go through, hope you are doing ok today!). I did get slightly queasy when I was hungry or really tired, but again this was a very mild feeling. Never close to throwing up or anything like that and no unusually strong food aversions (although I have pretty strong aversions normally and don't like the idea of meat right now). I feel I have had some cravings - mainly for lemonade, pickles, and anything that tastes sour + really bland things like crackers and cheese (I would kill for a Triscuit right now, can't find them in the UK!). I am thirsty all the time and go to the loo 3x a night at least. Fatigue is still pretty strong and lately in the morning I feel dizzy if I get up too fast. But, all that being said, I could easily not know I was pregnant...the biggest giveaway are the larger boobs and my little bloated belly - it's visible in a tight shirt and looks kind of pregnant/like I ate a huge meal. But it looks more pregnant than last time around, if that makes sense? How about you @Kiki061190?

Hope you ladies all enjoy the sunshine and relax! Xxx

@sadtoday21 ooh exciting about the 12 week scan! I'm sure the little one will wriggle away :😄

@Catconfusion oh god that sounds horrific. Hopefully you feel a bit better soon . I'm glad they're offering you another scan so soon again!

@MrsMGE the money is great out here so we're trying to save up for when we eventually move back! With Brexit and all going on now it doesn't feel like we're missing out 😁 schooling is so expensive out here while childcare is not, so we will stay until our kid (hopefully soon) will come close to school age I think. That's the plan so far but let's see 😄 where have you lived apart from the UK?

@sadtoday21 I swear the only thing I have is the sorest nipples! Sorry TMI! That’s all I really have along with fatigue and the need to wee ALL THE TIME! I keep going to bed super early to compensate for how many times I get up in the middle of night and have to fall asleep again. My OH has been very attentive so I’m super grateful for him. A bump is such a beautiful thing! I’m so excited for your scan. All will be well ♥️ I had a wobble yesterday because of lack of symptoms and started to google the chances of two mmc in a row. I just feel the same as last time and had one of those moments of do I have a scan or not? I’m due to go on holiday in just 12 days so I really don’t want to know if there is an issue before then so have decided to forget about it for the time being. Have just started to struggle with anxiety around mmc again this week!

Thanks @Sunstruck! I really hope so. How are you doing?

@Kiki061190 I've definitely been there many times and I still have the same thoughts as you. It's so tough after mmc. Your symptoms/lack of symptoms sounds pretty much exactly like me. I kept thinking it would kick in later up until about 9 weeks, then I gave up. Now at 11+1 I've had to accept that I'm not going to really have symptoms and it will either be ok or it won't. It's terribly nerve-wracking, but there is really nothing you can do except go for a scan and find out. And of course the scan causes a lot of anxiety in and of itself! If you can hold out until 12 weeks, more power to you, but I personally couldn't.

These are my thoughts on early scans: Pros: you find out earlier if something is wrong and if everything is fine, you get to see baby developing at different stages which is really amazing. Cons: You get more attached to baby if things go wrong later and you might have a false sense of reassurance and/or only temporary reassurance + scans are terrifying. TBH, knowing everything I know now, I would always get an early scan at around 7 weeks just to make sure everything is in the right place and there is a hb. Beyond that, it's just about managing the anxiety as much as possible. I've had three scans already and the 12 week will be my fourth, but it still feels like far too few given what I went through before. I'm trying to focus on other things now as best as possible, but it's not easy. I hope you are able to take your mind off it, whatever you decide, and that you have a lovely vacation (which will help a lot as a distraction!).

BTW, anyone have good ideas for fifth year anniversaries? Ours is the day before our scan, so I'm feeling too preoccupied to plan anything, but feels like I should make an effort!

@Catconfusion I love a good virgin mojito on a hot day. Mint should help you as well, I'd hope? Another reason to have one, and perfect for the BBQ!

Try the BRAT diet, if you find it appealing/acceptable, it's meant to be easy to digest and nutritious, might just be helpful.

@Kiki061190 I'm generally more into savoury food, and it was really noticeable when I was pg, all I craved were sausage rolls and scotch eggs, I never normally eat them! But oh my days, anything beige, bland and unhealthy was a dream. I used to walk to work past Greggs and drool! 😂😂😂

@sadtoday21 Thanks, fingers crossed for September 🤞 Sorry you're feeling anxious, that's completely understandable. Not sure what would help with that, especially now, before the final first trimester scan with only few days left. I really hope you'll keep busy now and have some much needed positive news, and that the second trimester will be far more relaxed for you. ❤️ Re 5th year anniversary celebrations when pregnant, maybe a nice afternoon tea for him & her in cosy, quaint tea rooms? That's a nice, relaxing, easy option. Alternatively, something more out there, a city break perhaps, if you have time & funds to plan it? Amsterdam is always good & easy to get to, alternatively Prague, Berlin, Gdansk or Ljubljana are also fab for the weekend. Am I guessing right from previous discussions, are you American/Canadian? Are you OK to travel without faffing too much, or would you need an additional visa?

I'd love to plan something fun for DH's birthday, I'm dying to do white water rafting or something along those lines, but I can't book this for now, in case I do get pg.

@SunStruck I lived in several Central/Eastern European countries and also spent a lot of time in Italy, through work, studying & family connections. I'm actually a dual citizen. You might guess from that what my views on Brexit are, but without getting too political on this forum, and focusing on personal circumstances, mine and DH's position, is luckily, pretty flexible thanks to my status. I completely understand where you're coming from, and if it wasn't for my status, I think I would have possibly moved by now. Still not dismissing this idea, but I would like to start the family first, rather than move and start afresh with everything, house, job etc. , as this would take some time to build up. Xxx

@sadtoday21 Thanks so much for your kind words ♥️ I’m looking to make it to my holiday and back. I’ll be 9.5 weeks when I get back so I think it’ll be more manageable from there. I hate the unknown!

Thanks @MrsMGE I really appreciate that! I have a good feeling that September is your month! Will you track this time around? I can appreciate how hard it is to plan bdays and vacations when you don't know what the future will bring - I'm the same way! Was planning a trip to France for this anniversary, but after the bfp I decided that France without wine is not France at all! I like the idea of a tea room and I was thinking of visiting a nice stately house somewhere for some romance. Otherwise, don't have too much time to plan a trip for this week and honestly way too tired to think about getting on an airplane right now! Just want easy, cheap, low key romance, if you know what I mean.

Most importantly, how does one make a virgin mojito??! I need fun drink ideas to replace bubbly on our anniversary, which is my go-to for celebrations :).

@Kiki061190 that's a great way to think about it - just keep distracting yourself and get past those milestones! Everything you are feeling and going through is completely normal and I'm thinking of you and hoping for the best Xxx.

@sadtoday21 I agree re: France. I went to Italy when I was pg and stayed at a winery (booked before the BFP), it was hard!!! Definitely not the same. I imagine France would be even more challenging with all the cheese and pate, too!

Have you thought about visiting Blenheim Palace? It's stunning. Alternatively somewhere in Bath, or Bletchley Park, for example? Depends where you're based.

Re virgin mojitos (VM) I anticipate @Catconfusion is the Chief Pro VM Maker with all the tips, I've used the BBC Good Food recipe before and they were delightful. Link below 🍸:

www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/174606/virgin-mojito

Enjoy 😁😁😁 xxx

@MrsMGE I also loveeeee savoury food!!!!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️

@sadtoday21 I’m hoping it’s just one of those moments of anxiety and thy it will pass. My scan is October 3rd so not that far away if I actually think about it!

@Kiki061190 and @sadtoday21 all the luck for your scans! ❤️ I would also need to have a lot of scans this time around, I am not the patient kind of person that could wait until my 12 week scan! 🤣 Poor OBGYN sees more of me than some of my friends ha-ha. Hope you have been able to have a few virgin mojitos, they are so fresh and nice!

@MrsMGE oh we are SO similar! I have also lived in Eastern Europe for a year (Czech Republic), it was amazing! I love Prague so much. I am actually an European Citizen and don't hold a British passport (hubby is British), and I don't plan to get a UK passport at this point 🤣 I'm telling him he should get mine!!!

We need to get pg soon as it's boring not being able to book/plan much when you don't know what it's going to be like in a few months time!

Are you enjoying your bank holiday so far? Xx

I've had lots of cramps so I'm guessing those pills are working, hopefully the follicle is growing in super speed 🤣

Hope everyone had a good Bank Holiday weekend!

@Catconfusion How did the BBQ go? Did you tell the family? Xx

@Kiki061190 I'm happy to talk about savoury food, or anything else that will distract you for the next few weeks! I also need distraction, I'm so impatient and want to start trying again ASAP!

@SunStruck Ah, no wayyy! That's amazing. I love, love, love Prague, especially Mala Strana. You know what, I've worked out that if we get pg in September, we'll be due in the end of May 2020 (assuming second time lucky for us!). That's aaaaaages away, feels like a different life! I try not to think about this now cause it's depressing to have to wait so long, even in the best case scenario! I'm still desperate to go on holiday soon, obviously will postpone of needed, but I'd love to have something booked. I'm going to follow your suggestion and book towards the end of the year if still no BFP/things go wrong again.

I've had a very productive weekend, thanks! Been out a lot, cycling, walking my dog etc., lots of fresh air. The weather has been great ☀️ Also, the house has been blitzed, DH's birthday shopping sorted, couple of short one-day trips booked for before Christmas, I've been on fire! I like being busy and when things get done. I really wanted to prep well before Sep/Oct too, as they're looking very busy work-wise. And last, but not least... Aperol Spritz was delightful 😍🍹AF is finished, gym tomorrow, tracking O from Thursday 💪 I'm a woman on a mission!

How was your weekend? Shame yours wasn't a long one, but I hope you still enjoyed? Xxx

@MrsMGE sounds like you've accomplished a lot this weekend, well done! 😄 we have a long weekend this coming weekend so I'm not missing out! Me and DH will go for a date day on Friday, going to a Greek place for brunch and some drinks 🍹

I received an email from one of the pregnancy apps I signed up to about 'congrats on being 6 months pregnant' 🥴 unsubscribe 😂

My due date would have been 18th of December (I'm definitely not checking until the 3 month mark next time around), just hope pregnant by then!

We are also going to book a few weekends away for this year, no need to wait 😄

Yay we're gonna start tracking on the same day! 👯

Thanks @sunstruck

Hey @MrsMGE bbq was lovely thanks. Mil and husband are over the moon. I got a little bit of rest from the nausea but it was back yesterday and worse today. We have the midwife tomorrow so it’s all getting very real! Xx

@SunStruck I love Greek cuisine, it's all about tzatziki and souvlaki! Anything with feta cheese is awesome as far as I'm concerned, too.

Go for it, book short trips away, why not! If we get pg, this shouldn't be too strenuous if we're fairly close to home. And if it takes us a bit longer, then we'll enjoy the cocktails whilst being away, that's what I say!

My DD was 14 January, I booked time off then and will do something nice. Definitely not sitting in work as I don't know if/how it's going to hit me.

Soooo now... practical questions, I genuinely have around 100 different ovulation sticks now, Clearblue, another brand starting with "F", name of which I can't remember, and the cheap ones that are provided to the NHS (ordered mine from Amazon). Read Clearblue instructions so far, am I getting this right, do I just need to pee on the stick/dip it in urine every morning starting from Thursday until I get my smiley face/two lines?

@Catconfusion I'm delighted for you, I bet they must be thrilled! Also midwife appointment, this is going fast! I hope all goes well, also hope your HG settles a bit soon. Take care of yourself lovely xx

Hey @MrsMGE thank you. I was vomiting for 20 minutes this morning so I’m hoping that’s a one off. If it continues I’ll take the medication.

Personally I got more luck with the cheap opks. I felt like the clear blue missed my surge as it seemed to happen in the late afternoon. I guess it depends how regular your cycles are. You could always test twice a day but I guess that gets expensive. As my cycles were so irregular I pretty much gave up on opks. Xx

@Catconfusion Thanks. And sorry to hear about the vomiting spell, did it ease off now? Hope screen time is not making you feel worse?

I'll be dtd every 2-3 days anyway for about 20 days, I'm determined this month! So regardless of tracking, I'm hoping things will work. I feel like myself finally, physically I have a lot more energy, for the first time since the MC I feel comfortable in my own body and I have my shit together! So I'm going to thrive on this, and definitely not planning on getting cystitis this month! 🤦🏼‍♀️😬 Xx

Hey @MrsMGE I’m feeling a bit better thanks. I’ve got a bit of work I’ve needed to do today. I don’t think screen time is affecting it in short spells.

I’m really pleased you’re feeling so positive and have energy again. It’s so nice to get back to yourself after so much trauma. I really hope this is your month! Xx

@MrsMGE yes that's about it (about ovulation sticks) :) I'm using Clearblue digital as I think it's easier. Shows blinking smiley face (high fertility) and then solid smiley (peak, will ovulate in the next 12-48 hours).

We will book for a staycay here in November, can't wait! Just lots of good food and hotel sheets, mmmm! 😄 lounging around in a robe all day!

@Catconfusion oh so exciting you told them! 🥰 such happy news. Sorry to hear you feel so sick though, really hope it passes in a few weeks!

I have a scan tomorrow to see how my follicles are doing, hopefully they are growing quicker than without meds! Want to ovulate next week 🤞

@MrsMGE Those clear blue are highly rated but I never got a peak ever! Just those stupid wee flashing smiley faces for 9 days in a row. I must have such a short window for my ‘peak’ because I’ve never had a full positive ovulation test ever! I know I ovulate around cycle day 15 from temping so I just dtd every 2nd day from cycle day 10 😉 how are you keeping?

@Kiki061190 @SunStruck @Catconfusion thanks for all your kind words and advice girls!

@Kiki061190 That's really helpful to know, in case I never get a steady smiley face. I'd have freaked out that I'm not ovulating or that something is wrong if you didn't tell me!

Ahhh, I had a day of it, girls, rushing everywhere, had two really intense meetings in work, I'm exhausted! Going home to have some nice, fresh homemade food and binge on "Stranger Things" 😉👌 Netflix and chill all the way! Hope you're all doing OK today Xxx