Support/Chat thread for Panic Attacks, OCD, Obsessive Thinking, Depression, PND, come one come all!

[ibroughtcake]

Hi Everyone

I have been thinking of starting this thread for a while so here goes. I am hoping that it will turn into an ongoing thing where we can all get to know and support each other through whatever difficulties we are facing.

Firstly about me, I am mummy to DD 2 and DS 7wks. I have suffered with panic attacks and obsessive thinking for about 5 years now. There have been times when I have been free from it and times when it has been easier (ie when I was on fluoxetine!). I have tried CBT and SSRI's both with some success, but I am really in the midst of a bad time with it at the moment and noticed many other posts about similar things so thought we could all meet at the same place IFSWIM!

I finally went back to the GP to ask for some help yesterday and she has referred me to the Mental Health team and given me a script for Fluoxetine (Prozac). I haven't started taking them yet as I am breastfeeding. I know that they are safe to take whilst bfing but I have anxieties about that too!!

So please come and join, share your tale etc and hopefully we will be able to support each other and offer our own experiences to help some others.

i brought cake, i dont know where the rest of the panic brigade are tonight, but there does seem to be a lot of us about. I am just about to log off actually as im tired, and having a bad day, but my problem v briefly is panic (although not ness attacks of), PND, but obsessive thinking nails me on the head i think. Why ive never thought to call it that i dont know. I have two children dd1 is 17yr and dd2 is 2, so a big age gap. Its funny, i became obsessive after i had dd1 and im even worse now. I have health anxiety in a big way. I am on citalopram and waiting for counselling, nhs so i'll either be dead or cured by the time they get round to me. I think that when we have children we feel this massive responsibility to simply be there for them, and that is when the what ifs come into mind.

I think a support thread is a really great idea, a good place to come and say, you know what, im having a really shit day today (because i can't talk to DP as he has had enough basically) and even, well im having a good day today because....

Good idea, and well, if you've brought cake, i'll bring the tea!

Oooo a reply! I will be back to answer properly later, bfing and DD wants breakfast!

Just bumping for the morning crowd

must be just us then , tea?

I'm here only occasionally though, but would love to join! I am Mum to DS8 and DD4. I am obsessed about cleanliness (DH thinks I have given DD OCD!) I wont go on holiday unless it is camping in my sleeping bag and my tent! Sleeping in other beds apart from my own is just too terrifying. Scard of all the bed bugs and nasties crawling beneath me and don't sleep - so just refuse to even try now. I insist on DC's having a shower/bath every single night to wash away dirt from the day. They have clean clothes every day to. I work 34 hours a week so do create myself a lot of extra work but can't help it. Still check on DC's to make sure they are breathing before I go to be because if something happened to them and I didn't check I would never forgive myself. That's just a few of my issues - do you think I qualify to join you? LOL.

oh yes jayne you qualify, come on in!! oh and while your at it, could you please come to my house and stay for a week, i get so tied up in my obssessions that i CAN'T clean the house, its an absolute pit. But seriously, have you thought about going to the GP and asking for some meds to help you with this. I take citalopram, and although i don't have OCD (well not diagnosed at least) it has helped me to kick negative thoughts out of my head as they happen rather than letting them fester there. Apprarently it is very good for OCD so may well be worth a try. For what its worth, i dont seem to have any noticable side effects.

I would love a cuppa, thanks

Jaynerae, yes you qualify! glad to have you. I don't know about the cleaning thing because I have the obsessive thoughts but without any of the compulsions. I can identify with you though LEM as sometimes it feels like the whole day has passed and all I have done is go over and over the same thought, it is very exhausting!

I got a good book this morning that somebody on another thread recommended called the Imp of the Mind, I haven't started it yet but it looks good, I will let you all know how it goes.

I'm not so bad today, but not sure how the weekend will be, I always get more anxious around the weekend, I think it's because I know the GP isn't so available if anything happened IFSWIM (god I really am crazy lol)

I'll be back again tonight, to see if anybody else has decided to join us

Can I join (OCD person) - have to take ds swimming, but I'll check back later !

yes yes come on in, warm your feet by the fire

Nice thread
I'll come and join too.

I have dd who is 4, ds 14 months and am 33 weeks pg.
I suffer with panic attacks and anxiety which was brought on when I was pg with ds last year and I havent been able to shift it since.
I am on Citalopram but only 10mg and part of my problem is going to the dr's so I'm a bit stuck atm.

I also think (well know) part of it a obsessive thinking and thats what triggers the panic/anxiety.

Hiya Can I join please? Brief intro if no one knows about me - 21 and have an 18 month old DS, had depression for about 5 years but got worse 2/3 years ago, and also have PTSD and panic/anxiety attacks. Currently on Citalopram 20mg (or is it 40?) and sometimes Zopliclone 7.5mg sleeping tablets and Diazepam.

Aha, just checked, 40mg On that note, does anyone else suffer with really bad forgetfulness?

all the time QP, all the time

oh yes QS, ive recently gone onto 40mg and its not so much forgetfullness but the inabilaty to focus. I used to be queen of the multi task, but now i find myself battling to do one thing at a time. Better that though than being constantly bloody fretting. Even if i don't have anything specifically wrong, i start looking for things. I swear i can manifest symptoms at will.

Imp in the mind??? Fecking great gremlins in mine, and i mean the spike ones rather than gizmo at the moment

ibroughtcake, I borrowed Imp of the Mind off another mumsnetter (was it mummytosteven who mentioned it?)
it rang true to alot of things.
Good book.

I'm back ...thank you for letting me join !
I have one ten yr old son and have had OCD for a very long time- certainly since early twenties, probably before. It was very bad in mid twenties and I had analysis for some time before having treatment is hospital - no drugs when in hospital - was a very famous one for the treating of nervous disorders in a community setting and absolutely no drugs permitted - was an interesting experience to say the least !
Anyway, was ok for another period of time,then it returned, saw psychotherapist.

Manageable again until another period of crisis when I had CBT and drugs and it worked a treat. It returned when pregnant with ds and made the later stages of pregnancy unbearable (severe anxiety,fear of germs - truly awful). Sorted itself out though with help of fabulous GP.

I would say that it never completely goes away,it lurks there in the background and every so often strikes - I'm generally anxious most of the time and it's worse when I'm going away anywhere or under extreme pressure,though I'm quite calm in real emergencies.
I've recently tried hypnotherapy which is brilliant for relaxing and I think has helped in the general day to day dealing with anxiety. So there you have it - I sound like a complete crazy person looking at all that. I like to think that it feeds my creativity - there must be some positive outcome from all this nervous energy !

Evening ladies! Just thought i'd post and see if any of you have experienced this. Have been at the docs a million times because of this kind of dizzy/unbalanced feeling i've been having (also feeling a lot of pressure in the face). I'm also feeling soooo tired. I don't mean the usual mummy sort of tired - I mean mega tired. Can hardly function through the day. Had also been getting pains in my chest, well under my left boob really. Wouldn't have bothered if it had been the right hand side. To cut a long story short i constantly feel like shit and ended up at the docs the other week begging her to do something cause i was convinced something was wrong ( i still am). She's diagnosed me with anxiety and given me citalopram (20mg) which i haven't yet taken because to be honest i've got nothing to be anxious about - I truly don't, so i'm a bit reluctant to take them. The only thing i'm anxious about is this dizziness and so on. Sorry for the length of this but i'm hoping maybe someone will have experienced this and tell me i'm not going round the bend!

Evening all

Just got DD off to bed (Friday being our film and popcorn night) so finally get to mn!

So glad we have some more joiners! It's very interesting reading everyones stories, I'm always amazed at how many other people are going through these things, I know that I feel sometimes as if it is only me, who has these thoughts/feelings.

elliemac I'm sorry to hear you are not feeling well atm. I know that I get the dizziness when I am feeling very anxious but not sure about the rest of your symptoms. Has the gp done any blood tests or not? Do you think you will take the citalopram? I have been in two minds today about starting my Fluoxetine, I know that I will feel better afterwards but I have huge anxieties about taking it in the first place!

I am hoping to make a decision one way or the other about the meds this weekend (i know that I am secretly hoping that I will suddenly be cured and not have to take them!)

NBG, the book looks good I will start it tonight I think. Has anybody read from Panic to Power? It is one of the best books I have found on panic and obsessive thinking, it is slightly cheesy american in some places but other than that such a good resource

Hope everyone has a good weekend

Sorry meant to add, MaryAnnSingletomb you sound like an old hand at all this glad to have you with us.

One of my scariest thoughts when I am panicing is that I will be hospitalised so I am happy to read your account of it being an interesting experience

Hello! I was MummytoSteven, and yes, I do recommend "The Imp of the Mind" to lots of people

I relate to a lot in the 2nd half of your post MAS. I also had bad problems in PG with hand-washing/germ phobia.

TotalChaos, I started reading a few pages earlier and was more worried that it was just going to give me more thoughts to worry about that I hadn't thought of myself did you find this happened at all?

Adds her name to list..

I've suffered with panic attacks and several major bouts of depression since I was 17 was put down to childhood sexual abuse,I guess, PTSD.Have various different drug treatments and counselling ,mainly SSRI therapy and took one type on and off for 12 yrs it helped greatly-I'm now drug free although I feel my mind will always be a bit wobbly and prone to panic and worry (especially health wise).I'm a pretty shy person and can't do that whole meeting new people and group things *sighs.
Recommend reading any of Clare Weeke's books.

Hi GFC.

Ibroughtcake - I didn't find that a problem with the book, and I think it's useful to read the book and get an idea of just how common these thoughts are and to put them into their perspective (as being nasty thoughts, not an indication of what you are as a person)

GFC, nice name welcome I have heard some people mention Claire Weekes I will check her out

I swear i've got a self help section bigger than Waterstones

TC, I am surprised by how many people seem to get these thoughts, I suppose they just affect us in different ways.

I have told DP some of them before and he usually PHSL, which actually makes me feel better because it takes some of the seriousness away IYSWIM.

Ibroughtcake, Have had all the blood tests under the sun, have had and MRI and ECG and they can find nothing wrong. As i say i don't feel that i'm anxious before i have these symptoms but i get really anxious when i have them - does that make sense? It could very well be anxiety. Don't know about the citalopram. I'm in 2 minds cause i've read all the side effects and it doesn't sound pleasant but a friend of mine who had PND took it and it turned her life around - she classes it as her miracle.