Support/Chat thread for Panic Attacks, OCD, Obsessive Thinking, Depression, PND, come one come all!

[ibroughtcake]

Hi Everyone

I have been thinking of starting this thread for a while so here goes. I am hoping that it will turn into an ongoing thing where we can all get to know and support each other through whatever difficulties we are facing.

Firstly about me, I am mummy to DD 2 and DS 7wks. I have suffered with panic attacks and obsessive thinking for about 5 years now. There have been times when I have been free from it and times when it has been easier (ie when I was on fluoxetine!). I have tried CBT and SSRI's both with some success, but I am really in the midst of a bad time with it at the moment and noticed many other posts about similar things so thought we could all meet at the same place IFSWIM!

I finally went back to the GP to ask for some help yesterday and she has referred me to the Mental Health team and given me a script for Fluoxetine (Prozac). I haven't started taking them yet as I am breastfeeding. I know that they are safe to take whilst bfing but I have anxieties about that too!!

So please come and join, share your tale etc and hopefully we will be able to support each other and offer our own experiences to help some others.

Evening all

Short one cause of the rugby!!!

Welcome newbies, barefeete can't believe the gp gave you a bible and said be thankful for what you've got, very shoddy imo. Can you get any meds or see another doctor? My mum is coming to help me for a while soon it really does help doesn't it

NBG, I had a home birth too! Just 9 weeks ago, everyone says how brave you are and everything, I was so much more anxious that I might have to go into the hospital. It's the one time I have been thankful for my anxiety I was more bothered about that than being in labour . It went fab by the way 2hrs and was much nicer than my hospital birth. Good luck with the consultant

Hope we're all having a good weekend!

I finally plucked up the courage to go to the doctors, i had to get my pill at the same time so i thought i will get that then if i bottle it at the last minute it won't matter because it will just look like i have gone for my pill.

My appointment was for 9am but the surgery was running way behind so i didn't go in until 10am. I got my pill then i told the doctor how i was feeling (completly down, depressed etc) and she offered me anti-depressants. I said no to them because a) i had been on them before and they made no difference at all and b) because i feel they are a cop out for doctors who give them out like smarties now adays. My depression has gone deeper and deeper so no pill is going to fix it, talking things out will help.

So she told me because she was running so behind i would have to make another appointment for another time to see her and she said i may be able to see a counciller. I wish she had let me see a counciller while i was at that appointment because now i don't have the bottle to go again.

This has been going on for 6 years now so maybe it is one of those things i just have to live with.

Hi all. Having a really shite day today. Feeling really off balance today (as if i'm going to fall down). Am so stressed - my neck is sooooo tight. Please tell me this unbalanced/dizzy feeling is normal! Can't seem to get relaxed at all. Am off to bed now cause i just feel as if i want to sleep it away. Will check in tomorrow. Maybe its time i took these tablets eh?

ScaryFacedPumpkin, please go back to the gp, you have done the hard bit now and she will know why you have come back and you won't have to tell her all over again. for you that she told you to come back again though, I don't see why she couldn't just do it then, how long would it of took ffs!

ellie, sorry you were having a bad day, are you going to go back to the gp this week? Could you say that you really don't think it is anxiety and you want her to look into your physical symptoms? I do get the dizzy thing but only if I am having a strong panic attack and it sounds as if you are only anxious because of the symptoms, not that they are causing the anxiety IYSWIM. Have you thought about going to see an osteopath, they can be very helpful with things like this, might be worth just going for a consult and see if they can help. Hope you have a better day today

hI am newbie I am so amazed to see so many people in the same boat.
I have been on and off antidepressants for the last 17 yrs. I go thru highs and lows.my gp gave dosuliepin a while ago and wasnt great help.
because of all the probs with ds (17) causing hell at home I have just had it increased to max and valium to cope with panic attacks.
have felt a bit better than since last thursday,but quite sure its due to ds staying at friends so there hasnt been the screaming agro going on and actually had 3 nights solid sleep.
it really does help to have a good gp and family support too.I am hoping the increase in ad will give me some backbone to sort out ds1 and cope with both other 2 younger dds.
I truly sympathise with everyone on here who has deppression and anxiety its absolute hell to live with especially when you want to be fit and well to look after your family to the best of your ability.

elli - i had a friend who had a nervous breakdown following the pressure of ofsted at the school where he was head (the report was perfect and they made no recommendations for change!!) but he nearly killed himself with worry. His symptoms manifested in a totally physical way, he was totally unbalanced, couldnt even hold his head up, was awful for him and his family. It just goes to show how much stress and anxiety can affect us physically. Stress IS a physical condition. Not only does it affect what goes on in our brains it affects our metabolism etc, adrenalin production is increased when we are stressed and that affects many systems, digestion, can make us really shaky, can affect heart rate, bloody pressure etc etc.

Have you been prescribed ADs (SSRIs?) i think you should take them, see what happens - if the symptoms don't go after about three weeks, then go back to the doctor.

bloody pressure!! a fruedian slip!

Quiet place tonight!!! Have had a better day today but still a bit dodgy. Had DD christened today which was lovely then had about 20 back at the house for a bit of a buffet. All was going well until about 2 hours in. Started to get all hot and feeling as if i was going to pass out. Just buggered off to my bedroom and sat in there for a while. DH came looking to see what was up and i told him i just felt like telling everyone to go home! Anyway went back downstairs and got over it. Do you think i'm in denial about this anxiety thing? Sometimes i think i have it and other times i don't - WTF?????

Fantastic thread! Don't have time to read all now...I have OCD mildly no compulsions anymore (great book I have just purchased for it 'Tormenting thoughts and secret rituals by Ian Osborn really thrown a light on it) and depression intermittantly have a dd 18mth old, and terrible depression/pnd? afterwards.

hi ellie, congratulations on the christening, v brave to have the buffet at home, well done I dont think denial is the right word, but i wouldnt dismiss it, i always thought anxious people were timid people and believe me, i am NOT timid. In fact i have been told i am intimidating, by someone i am actually scared of, if that makes any sense! But i fret about everything, particularly health stuff, do you know, i think i know where all my moles are and the shape and size of them, and i have loads. Funnily enough, when i have genuine health problems, im objective about it. Give some medication a chance, youve nothing to lose, if it makes no difference you have ruled that avenue of help out. I just think you could be a lot happier anxiety causes depression if you ask me

Afternoon everyone

Ellie, I agree with LEM, give the meds a try if the physical stuff is still there then you know it is probably not anxiety. I think anyone would've been stressed having that many people to entertain though!

Welcome Ally90, I may try that book you mentioned, I just finished one called 'Imp of the mind' it was very good

lucyellensmum...i have changed GP pretty recently cos the last one was not very good!

Nbg...have researched panic/anxiety attacks now, and i'm fairly sure that's my problem. But do people usually know what is causing them?

i have had a really shitty couple of days, had the mother of all panic attacks last night and today i am obsessing over everything. FFS - i woudlnt mind but was at the docs on friday saying everything fine .

Sometimes i know what causes my anxiety, it usually is something stressful and then i start stressing about things that are not, if that makes any sense.

Panic attacks, for me, tend to come out of the blue, but usually if i have had a bad day.

I think i am in a state today because i know that DP is stressed today at work so i can't call him up and offload as i usually do so feel totally terrified and alone today.

Hey Chick - Offload here. Thats what its for! I felt crap last night too. Ended up in bed at 8pm. That seems to be the only thing that works for me - sleep it away!

Hi to all, I hope you don't mind if I join. I've just started taking citalopram today though I have a very long history of depression, anxiety and panic attacks. Have seen a counsellor, cbt pyshcologist and a psychiatrist in the past and been on more meds than I can remember. Been off them for a really long time though as I really hate them. I have a 3yo ds who is great most of the time but has just started nursery five morning sessions and hates it. He's stopped going to bed without screaming for hours and is waking and doing the same in the night. Just thought I'd send out some supporting thoughts and calming vibes to all you out there feeling the same. I've got friends round in half an hour for play dates so am feeling a fair bit panicky about the state of my house and me in general but thought I'd post quickly here first. Thanks, hope you are all having good days and if not that then tolerable days.

Hi LEM

Sorry you are not having a good day, has it got any better yet? It is horrible when a pa hits you out of the blue isn't it.

I know just what you mean about not being able to call your DP. I used to get so anxious about that if I knew I couldn't contact him or if he was having a bad day, I also get it if we are supposed to be doing something good or it is a birthday, in case I ruin it with my anxiety

I really hope your day has got better by now [hugs]

Welcome Moo too, let us know how you get on with the citalapram, that does seem to be the popular choice with the gps

ibroughtcake, thankyou, my day got much better - decided to take dd swimming, despite shitting myself about having to get on a train (one of my pet fears). But we did have a lovely time, went for lunch after and she had a knickerbocker glory that was bigger than she is Got a bit panicked on the way home though, got the bus back instead

my advice is try nlp. it works! and it takes no time. it has helped me fix a number of serious problems where all other treatments/pills/doctors failed

I have a thing for trains too!

I always think I might panic really bad and start screaming to get off the train

I made myself take 4 trains the other day to go shopping with DD and she loved it! Well done for getting out and about, I would love to go swimming with DD but it is way to much with DS too.

Glad your day got better.

dontwanttogetoutofbed, what is NLP?

I got a reply from the CBT centre that I emailed about prices, um £95 for a 50min session, that won't be happening then [shock} [grin}

IBC - £95!!! Thats just praying on people who are so desperate to feel better that they'll pay anything - FFS !!

Been to the docs today and they reckon i've got something wrong with my ear. Had a terrible night last night.. Kept thinking i was going to pass out. They gave my some tablets to stop the dizziness and stuff but as usual i'm convinced i've got a brain tumour or something!!

Ok i need to offload - i have been lurking since my last post but just haven't known what to say.

DH said to me the other night when he was drunk - "you have made this into the worst relationship i have ever had". I thought that he was just drunk and didn't mean it but i asked him last night and then again this morning if he meant it and he said he did.

This has just come at me so suddenly i don't know what to do. He has always been fantastic and i think i have worn him down. is it possible to break even the most calmest of people? I get snappy and frustrated by such small things and find it so difficult to get any persepctive. I know my triggers but can't control them even if i try. I start to get anxious and feel dizzy and have rapid breathing for such small things - packing up everyones stuff to go to the beach, getting home in time to cook the kids tea i mean just riduclously small stuff. I know if is all about me loosing control and not being able to deal with everything.

I can't seem to explain this to DH, i have before and he didn't get it then and so have given up now.

I am living abroard and feel i have no where to go.

Barefeete - Have you talked to anyone apart from DH about this? I know how you feel. DH is starting to get really pissed off with me at the mo. He says i seem to be constantly maoning about stuff (which i am). I don't think they really understand how crap it makes you feel. Are you taking any ADs or anything? Maybe you'll feel better just by having a good old rant on here

I just spoke to him this evening and i think he is just upset with being on the knife edge but to be honest i am not sure what i need to do to help myself. Not on AD but am now thinking this might be the best option now i am not bf.

i just feel like i have a black cloud over my head and i can't shift it.

I have had an anxiety disorder, OCD, definitely obsessive thinking and I had treatment for that a few years ago (CBT). I have always become obsessed with certain ideas and lately, under great stress from various sources it seems that I'm now bipolar. Looking back I think I've been like this for years. I have always been tormented by my thoughts, probably since I was a child but I used to think everyone probably experienced this! The problem is that you only know what is going on in your own head.