Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Covid

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Turning off ventilator

186 replies

jinglybell · 06/02/2021 06:31

Partners brother has been ventilated for 3 weeks now.

A little improvement but he got an infection a couple of days ago and everything has gone down hill.

They are removing the vent shortly to let him pass.

Gutted.

OP posts:
Bornlazy · 06/02/2021 13:50

lljkk maybe the OP doesn't feel quite up to explaining the decisions made as to why they are turning off his ventilator. She's probably concentrating on comforting her partner who will have just lost his brother.

Norah8 · 06/02/2021 13:52

Life is way too cruel. I hope he passes gently and you and yours are as OK as you csn be

AquaFairySoul · 06/02/2021 13:54

@Bornlazy

lljkk maybe the OP doesn't feel quite up to explaining the decisions made as to why they are turning off his ventilator. She's probably concentrating on comforting her partner who will have just lost his brother.
Beat me to it , I don't think that was a very sensitive or appropriate question in the circumstances
LemonadeFromLemons · 06/02/2021 14:32

I’m so sorry OP. I’m desperately hoping his children are adults but guessing they are not. Poor kids 💐

happytoday73 · 06/02/2021 14:34

Oh OP I'm so sorry.... Hugs and flowers to you all.
I am pleased they are allowing some visitors....that will hopefully be a small comfort at a horrible time.

IloveJKRowling · 06/02/2021 14:35

OP, this is just heartbreaking. Sending my best wishes to you and your family. Vent on here so you can be strong for your partner and his family. We're listening. Flowers

Poor, poor kids.

mumboss1984 · 06/02/2021 14:35

So sorry, it is all so cruel 😢

HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee · 06/02/2021 14:37

@lljkk. Now isn’t the time for conspiratorial what ifs.Clearly it’s an evidence based MDT decision

Humpty11 · 06/02/2021 14:38

So sorry to hear this, sending hugs to you all.
I’m sure he’s breaking inside but he might not let anyone see that for a while Flowers

custardbear · 06/02/2021 14:40

I'm so sorry OP - I hope he's strong enough to breath alone if they're taking him off the ventilator ~ it's bloody awful, I'm so sorry for your family and others who have lost due to covid too 🥺

Groundhogday21 · 06/02/2021 14:50

Be ready when the grief comes for your DH. My bils brother died recently (quick cancer) and he was fine for a few weeks then suddenly crashed. It will hit him eventually. I’m so sorry Flowers

IAmongstTheWorld · 06/02/2021 14:52

I am really sorry to hear about your brother in law.

For those questioning the decision it will be between family and the medical team.

SquigglePigs · 06/02/2021 14:55

So sorry for you and your family Flowers

justasking111 · 06/02/2021 14:57

So sorry for you all Sad

Spiratedaway · 06/02/2021 14:58

@jinglybell

The hospital are allowing 4 people to be with him so his wife and 2 children will be there as well as my partner. My heart is breaking for them. I donymt know how involved I'll be in what comes next but I'll do all I can to support them all. My partner is very calm, not showing any emotion while I'm sitting here in bits.
Oh my god this is awful I am so sorry x
BIWI · 06/02/2021 14:59

Oh no! So sorry Flowers

Spiratedaway · 06/02/2021 14:59

[quote jinglybell]@Blessex no underlying conditions whatsoever. Nothing.[/quote]
How old was he if you don't mind me asking his poor wife and kids x

Squiffany · 06/02/2021 15:03

My ICU is different in this wave. We have people on ventilators in their 50’s, 40’s, 30’s, 20’s and late teens. The majority have no known underlying conditions. The numbers of patients ventilated is more than double the first wave. The original ward has expanded into 3 other wards.

I’m sorry OP.

BlueTimes · 06/02/2021 15:04

I’m so sorry. Flowers

HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee · 06/02/2021 15:10

2nd wave is a different clinical profile, patients no underlying conditions, extremely unwell and ventilated as @Squiffany said

73kittycat73 · 06/02/2021 15:11

I'm so, so sorry. My best wishes to you and you family. Flowers

Travelledtheworld · 06/02/2021 15:11

So sorry. I have experienced this too.
Sometimes everything just goes downhill and they have total system failure. Nothing else can be done.
I hope you will be able to spend a little time with him, talk to him and say goodbye. It will be a peaceful passing.
Take time to grieve and talk about him often to keep his memory alive.
You are all in my thoughts.

73kittycat73 · 06/02/2021 15:14

*Your

EachDubh · 06/02/2021 15:16

I am so sorry you are going through this. I know it won't mean much just now but at least they can be there and you will be there for your partner. Look after each other.

Rainbowsandstorms · 06/02/2021 15:18

I’m so very sorry. You must be heartbroken. I’m glad your husband is able to be there with him Flowers