Jackass whisperers against the cheap beer virus

[PrincessConsueIaBananaHammock]

Thread number...4?!? Fucking hell I've never been so popular.

Keep on keeping on and ,moan,whinge and laugh while you enjoy your deliveries and cackle evilly while you kill thousands.

All under the benevolent eye of your awesome , yellow and very ripe leader.

May the bleach be with you.

Thanks Princess. Seemingly his twatishness knows no end.

I get on well with ex-mil and she's called him all the names under the sun for relegating DD for some lass he's known for a fortnight, so she'll likely hex him too.

@Willow2017 just read the fighter jet news article on that thread, god I needed a good laugh thank you! 😂

@CrowCat what a complete arsehole, praying he gets the clap! And not in a neighbourhood applause kind of way 😂

Pigeons thanks for adding to the hex, I'll fish out my voodoo doll and start sticking pins in his dick.

Ohh, you’ve given me an idea @CrowCat. I have very little talent or skill to help the ‘angles’ in the fight against ‘the Vid’ as DH calls it

However I can knit, maybe I can start knitting voodoo dolls and donating them to pissed off key workers and those stuck at home. Surely that will boost moral more than the clap???

@Thepigeonsarecoming do it! My DD1 would love one considering the amount of the arsehole customers she has to deal with every day. Far more useful than the clap.

Can you make one of each of us first pigeons?

I have a pattern to make a jelly baby, I’m guessing that will do! @princess of course, as long as you all use them responsibly 😂

Ohh a pattern for voodoo dolls actually exists, now my internet search history is again looking questionable!!

crazydaisy60.blogspot.com/2011/05/voodoo-doll-please-do-not-use-my.html?m=1

Pigeons Ooh I love jelly babies! I'll give mine massages and feed her gin

@CrowCat actually just looked at the jelly baby recipe again and they are probably too cute to stick pins in 😂. Has been many years since I’ve made one so forgot!!!

Pattern not recipe 😂😂

Far too cute!!

I wouldn’t stick pins in those.

Not pins but pigeons might cook them 😂😂😂

Ooh but i would like a recipie for jelly babies though😄

Whooo just discovered my local garden centre is taking online orders. Why the hell didnt i look sooner? This could cost me ££££!

All this talk of jelly babies I feel a non essentials 'jog' to the shop coming on tomorrow

Willow I ordered stuff from Homebase before Easter and it still hasn't arrived

Oookkkaaay I'm not on the thread for a day and we nearly reach the end.

Movie coming along ok? I hear Johnny Depp is in it, whoop whoop.
More hexing needed? A hex on all our ex's and in laws if needed. Hth.

I've been looking at essential supplies from Amazon, like 2kg chocolate and jelly babies and large bottles of gin. I reckon I'll be back at work next week or week after so I'm going sober for a bit. If I find out we're not back for a month or similar, I'll be straight back on the wine.

New thread will be needed really soon, oh popular princess.

morning oh wodnerous murdering bananians

I managed to sleep last night, now 2 days with no alcohol and feleing much better !

hex for you ex crow

off to work shortly. not sure how much killing Ill fit in today, will try my best but work does rather get in the way!
Still, I am sadly excited about my skip arriving tomorrow and feel that my more than make up for my weekly kill count!

happy murdering all

Under His Sausage

Good morning. I have a murderous day planned, including at least a walk and a swim.

My question for the day: When will the government be paying out £60,000 to the families of those who die from lack of cancer treatment (www.theguardian.com/society/2020/apr/29/extra-18000-cancer-patients-in-england-could-die-in-next-year-study)? Our do they not count as they're not angles?

Do Amazon sell 2kg of chocolate buttons? If so I’m in

Morning all

Murdering jelly babies? Sticking pins in their cute little faces, and then cooking them?
...okay, then.

Not sunny this morning. Very grey and overcast, like my soul.
Must up my kill count. I can no longer venture onto the madness and bitter vitriol that is the remainder of MNet. It's like a virtual horde of witch-burners hissing through their teeth, in their sackcloths and rags, hair unwashed, dental hygiene out the window, dragging their hazmatted children behind them as they light the pyre.

Under His godforsaken and judgemental, virus-ridden Eye

I may not have woken in the best of moods

Morning fellow Bananians and most luscious and yellow highness.

@PrincessConsueIaBananaHammock Can someone put some incontinence pads on the clouds? I think they were all bought in the mad panic in March. Perhaps by people who thought they could work as a substitute for loo roll. Would those re-usable pants do?

Well done on the alchohol Max. It's nice waking up and not feeling guilty.

Just a thought re: a new business we could all partner in - www.hex4myex.com

Could include - crocheted ex husbands / a selection of bespoke hex's/ royal divorce decrees from our serene highness/ enforcement of maintenance and custody agreements by our elite AK47 firing squad.

Does anyone else enjoy the Viking thing on Netflix? I love it. I think we have found our ancestors. I want to go rampaging and humping. It seems eerily similar to "these troubled times". Plus I enjoy the gratuitous bathing scenes when the errant hero emerges half clad from a pond in most episodes.

Morning all , I have to say I'm pleasantly surprised to notice that the Active section is less and less corona doom and gloom and that various other "normal" issues are taking over.

I'm waiting for my banana shaped little doll.