30s TTC: Club BESHicana, drinks are free and we're hungry like the WOOFL! The MSDP continues...

[Scorpette]

Come on in, collect the Grolsch bottle tops for your DM shoes at the door

We're going all-out 80s for the continuation of the Mass Summer Diffment Project: John Hughes films playing back-to-back and on BESH FM, DJ ChoCho will be playing our all-time 80s faves, from New Romantics to Synth to Goth to Hair Metal to Pop and back again (no Fields of The Nephilim, mind). Our bartenders and waiters are Ducky from Pretty in Pink, Ralph Macchio (the Karate Kid) and Corey Haim (back from the dead especially for us) and unlike most of the real 80s, we actually get to booze!

Here's hoping the authentic 80s vibe will trick our bodies into thinking we've got the ovaries of teenagers!

(Not to mention tricking them into being super skinny and able to eat whatever we want and staying that way!)

There's plenty of Babycham and Ice Magic to pour over ice-cream in the Pit and Metal Mickey will bring them to the wretched at the click of a finger.

So whaddya waiting for? Slip on the ra-ra skirts, slap on the blue eyeliner and let's get winning those baybeez! Last one in the pool's a psycho hose beast!

29th, my dear Showofhands. So near and yet so far...

Lyra I'm not surprised that made you ill, sounds horrible. Very glad it's over and your tubes are clear.

Hi sausage, welcome to the madhouse. Can't believe your GP fobbed you off for so long, glad you've now got answers even if they're not great news. Is the fibroid something you just have to live with or can they shrink it or something?

gin I hope you're tucked up in bed fast asleep, all the best for the morning, you know already how much we're all hoping all's well.

Off to bed, but not before wishing Gin all the luck in the world at the EPU in the morn. And big hugs to the other poor BESHes who've been spotting. Let tomorrow be a pristine-gusset day for all

Blimey, saucisson. That sounds appalling, you poor thing. Still, as Scorps said, you're in the right place for black humour and bitching.

Gin Wishing you all the luck in the world with scan today.

And indeed, Scorps, today will be pristine-gusset day.

This morning I am sending every ounce of good luck I have to gin.

sausage that sounds all kinds of awful. How do you stay sane?

Yay for holidays Lorry, where are you going?

I found a competent receptionist at the GP and have an appointment for later this morning [shocked]. Now need to remember what I should be asking....

Everything's still crossed for gin

Lovin' the new fred Scorps I knew I kept my spotty batwing jumpers for a reason.

On tenterhooks for news from ginny this morning. Candle burning for you down here to m'lovely.

Lyra - that sounds truly awful - 'clamping cervix' is still making me wince. But glad you had HO with you and it was good news.

Welcome to the noobs. Liking the menkulness and BESHknowledge

quick post before the boss sees:

good luck to gin - really hoping for you

lyra - hope you've got the day off and can spend the day in bed recuperating

slowshow - aaah, golders green! the home of carmellis, the best bagel bakery in the world!

as for scorps - thanks for the VERY friendly welcome!

thanks also to everyone for the welcome and kindness - glad to have a place to share the menkul as things can become nightmares but also shockingly normal to live with.

Pacing for Gin.

Day off, sausage? Ha bloody ha. I didn't know it was going to be so horrid, so didn't think to book time off. Am bit tender and achy, but really fine, wouldn't warrant a sickie.

I should really go shower but don't want to miss any news... ho hum.

(ps hello to newbies, have a jug of tequila sunrise & some Skittles)

ocs a competent receptionist? At a GP surgery? Pliz to take a photo of such phenomenon!

We're off on a fly drive round LA, San Franciso & the wonderfully OTT Vegas. Maybe I'll win a baybee on a fruit machine. What? You can win everything else.

Morning lovelies. Am very excited to be staling you all again. For now though I wondered if I could just join in the pacing in silence? Am near vomiting for the love of Gin

I am thinking of coming out of lurkage for this luverly new 80's fred. If you'll have me again? That said, I've only been over in the corner, peeping under people's skirts.

GinsterBiscuit, I just lit a little candle pot over here in Serbia (doing research). I am hoping the transnational wibes will help . I am sure you have heard it all before, but a good friend of mine had freaky bleeds all throughout the pregnancy and was perfectly fine at the end. Feel free to kick me in the buzwams though if such stories are unhelpful at this stage. I am really thinking of you and sending you all the love and a little transnational flame.

Orchidea I do not believe we have met , but it sounds like you and HungarianGoulash are down the same path of investigations as mua, perhaps an ickle bit behind. Well, not behind, just you know, a bit later. And I am trying to write a dissertation with this command of language?

As for me, well, in a state of general apathy. A truly amazing job fell through, I have no career prospects, everything seems to be easy for others and not for me. Like getting updiffed - everyone that has started the same time as me now has children. But that's ok, because I have no idea how we could afford a bigger place anyway, and all in all I am miserable, but hey, there is Club Tropicana and some BESHies so who cares!

Gin hope you haven't posted yet because you are too busy with good news ... thinking of you

Clucking bells! Its extreme & fairy.

Self-kicks and flagellation. Somehow missed half of this fred before I posted. Just realised it's all happening for Gin this morning.

C'mon y'all, let's give our all in a session of Agadoo. Will take our mind off the pacing and hopefully give gin a laugh too. That includes YOU, Mountbatten (gerroverhere for a snog, you slaaaag)

STREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEME So good to see you back, my little snugglepup How are you, my gorgeous one? Hope you're okay and pliz to stick around

Well, I have Lap check-up sesh later and Surgeon will give me the full details of what he saw (corpses of Shergar and Lord Lucan, Titanic, Lost City of Atlantis, etc.). Then it'll be onto a referral to the Fertilititty Clinic to be asked if we do it up the foofoo and no doubt told I'm too porky. Spoke to my Doc on phone earlier about having all my test results sent to me cos figures will help Needles Lady tailor treatment even better and she says my progesterone levels were really good, so am going to stay off Polly's witchcream for this cycle at least (still super-grateful to the angelic, caring, sexalicious Pooface for thinking of me). Told me summat interesting for all mah LPD twinz out there - Spotting before DPO10 is sign of LPD but anytime after DPO10 is nearly always just because the laydee is super-sensitive to changing hormones and should not stop you getting pg. She said this would make sense for me, seeing as I have allergies and am v sensitive emotionally, etc. So is good news. Then pissed on my chips with dreaded 'Unexplained Infertility' shiz. "With test results this good for you and your partner, you really should've got pregnant before now". Really, you don't say?

I hope it isn't tactless that I comment about all my tests results and so on being textbook. It's just that it's my very own peculiar level of hell - all medical facts saying I am baby-making machine except the factory seems to be on lockdown To be told everything's more than good to go but the going never starts is Mind Fuck Central

But less about me. I hope we get some (good) news from our darling Gin v soon

Am assuming that she is hanging around the EPU waiting to be seen.

Am in meetings all fucking morning - grabbing two seconds now to post - but thinking of y'alls and will be back.

Thank you Lorry. < Dances Johnny Depp style to distract LaurelLeaf and steal her holiday package which sounds too good to pass. >

Well Come Sausage! Gold digger from north Lahndan? Well, that's my kinda girl!

BTW Lyra my man's morphology is similar, me thinks, and I have to say they were not too bothered. I think they were more bothered by his volume which is low, though there is plenty a jizz per volume. That pesky FC appointment is approaching, so we'll know more...

Mmmm, you can snog, you can, lady Scorps.
You know, I checked accepted porkyness levels in my local whatchammacallit? Health Provider thingy? Oooh, you know what I mean ... mine is Camden. You are Hackney, right? Camden seemed to think BMI below 30 is ok, though my GP bansheed at me about being huge (BMI 28-ish) and probably diabetic (checked - am not) so FC would not do anything. Well, she is wrong! Tough I am trying to get to da ideal 25...

All this blabbing to distract from the nailbiting wait...

Popping back in for my once-a-thread marker - and to pace up and down in chorus line with a lighted candle (kind of Christingle, Bob Fosse style) for gin. Oh, Gin, I've lit both my Space NK sale candles for you here in Cider Country. Hang in there, ginbean, we're all willing you so hard to stay.

cannot offer any news or updates on MSDP chez fig, because it's been pretty much abandoned here, but I can say to sausage that I feel your fibroid pain - I had 2kg of them removed, including one big one on my left ovary. Is yours somewhere too tricky to get out? Mine were on the outside of the uterus; they shelled about 12 of them out in one go (DHB award here, pls - I have a scar that looks like a Caesaeran but no baby, sadly). There are definitely options that don't involve a myomectomy, like what I had: embolism, and laser treatment, for a start. Good luck with it - loads more women have them than realise. (And my continuing barren-ness isn't down to the state of my lady parts, according to the GP!)

lyra I have gone white just reading. Ginger cake? Ginger cake? I'd have gone straight to the TIffany website, do not pass go, collect £large treat, etc.

all other diffed BESHES - congratulations! You've been sooooo busy!

Am liking the decor. Why, only this weekend I threw Born in the USA into the trolley along with the shopping and my summer drivin' has already taken on a much more youthful feel. Is hard to do handbrake turns in an estate car, but y'know...

I am hoping Gin is either in t'pub celebrating or still waiting at EPU to be seen. No other options are allowed, d'ya hear me?

Good luck with appt Scorps. Streme!!! So good to see you back my darlin'. Can I have a grope of your bouncylicious buzzwams?