30s TTC: The BESH Palace - where the bar never closes, booze is free, the humour is black and babydust is strictly for snorting through a rolled up 20.

[PollyPoo]

Welcome BESHies to the new palais. Plz to come fill it up plz.

For your delight and delectation I have dragged across the bar and the pit. Along with Mitchell (of course) to grant your every wish (but you will probably have to fight Scorps for him first... good luck with that).

I have even brought the Kylie infused absinthe. Now, who will join me in a Blackhole?

Am as pissed as you Bangers (I just tried typing that and it came out as Nadgers. Thought that was humorous)

Bollocks and twats. Now feel like a terrible cow for quaffing on 2WWOLf = thingy fuck it. Bah. I don't deserve anything good aspecially after extreme's awfulness. and Ginnny's and everyone's.

Mornin' all

I only have to work until 3pm today then I'm not back until next Thursday! I'm going to do FUCK ALL (except smooch mah PollyPocket)!

Laters!

And extreme, hope you're feeling better today

Fucking hell streme, you poor darlin'. Massive squeezes to you - how are you feeling today? What a hell of a lot to take in, I really hope you are doing ok. Look after yourself my lovely.

Scorpy looks like we are all systems go for tomorrows lezfest BESHmeet. We've had 24 hrs without a puking incident, hurrah!

Gin how is mooch today? I hope he is on the mend and you have a lovely weekend with the folks.

How are the hangovers today Aries and Ed?

I think I might sit in the pit for a while. Other s-i-l is now diffed. She has been trying for 6 months and I'm not really jealous. Just very sad that I'm not as well.

Oh Muse I am so sorry. Big hugs and a pint of gin for you.

sorry muse .

Hope this doesn't come across as insensitive but I had to update after mentioning it yesterday - my niece was born overnight. Gorgeous, healthy and happy. I really hope that time comes for everyone who frequents these parts.

poo glad little 'un is better.

blimey extreme you've been so brave, going through all that and not telling anyone! More hairstroking from me - and maybe just a couple of sneaky feels. Scropes is right: you've had the best possible assessment of what's going on in there now, there's no guesswork, and hopefully this'll mean it's all speeded up. Fingers crossed!!

Scropes is always right

Sending you BESHalicious snogs and punches, EasterEggStreme! NeoPOLLYtan , am v glad Iris is a lot better and even gladder it's full steam ahead for our hot date!

Sorry for you, Muse. But you must try to pity them, as it's so childish that they're only diffing to be horrid to you. Your time will come

And congrats to Curly and her family on the arrival of her little niece. I only begrudge family members being pg or having a baby when the BESH or PESH is happy about it. There's loyalty (and mental issues) for ya! And she's going to have a lovely cousin almost the same age to grow up with - how perfect!

Gawd, am missing TYF so much. Am utterly pathetic. But he's my best friend and we love to just spend every second of our free time together I might have to get a Shaggy screensaver so I can gaze at his sleb lookylikey as often as I want...

Hooray for new nieces! I am absolutely happy for my sil and she was so nervous when she told me. And then my aunt and mum in law were so sweet and said how they were so upset for me and didn't want me to think that in the excitement anyone had forgotten. We all blubbed a bit.

Now I must go play Mario Kart with my nephew.

Awwww, sounds like you won big with the ILs, Muse - what lovely people! My MIL does the whole 'clutches pearls' crap if I so much as say I don't like a tv show (too much soul-bearing expression for her), so would never get such openness and loveliness. Your MIL sounds like a gem - bet she'll be a wonder when you DO win your baybee. And you WILL!

OH FFS! Just been to the loo and there was pink panther! It's only DPO6, fer chrissakes! And no bugger better shout 'Implantation bleed' at me, because we all know it's the crapness of my LPD. I'm never going to have a baybee, am I?

This makes it Babyfail No. 10. Do I get a medal or summat for going into double figures? And I'm all alone with no-one to hug me

I'll stop multi-posting now. Need a nap. And a baybee.

Except to say this: just flicked round on telly after that last post and alighted on 'Michaela's Zoo Babies'. Even pisspoor Ch 5 shows are mocking me now!

Oooooh, red panda! SQUEEEEEEEEEEE!

Scorps That is truly taking the piss. Very sorry, flower.

Can I ask if you're taking any supps or herbalness? Or do your allergies make this impossible?

Oh fucksticks Scorps. That is just ridiculous. You deserve a damn baby.

I am very lucky with my in-laws, they are all lovely. I've never felt less than a part of their family. They are the most welcoming and warm hearted folk. And will be wonderful when we do finally win.

In haste as am in pub but wanted to say i had a bleed 6dpo this cycle and it wasn't implantation and it wasn't the droid. . . .it just WAS. No idea if that is a comfort or not but didn't want to not TRY, you get me?! BESH squeeze to you, Scorps

ah, balls, Scorp.

Muse your inlaws sound so lovely. Wish mine were like that. [envious]

Scorps FFS that is shit. Is it my imagination or is that your earliest spotting ever? I am going to have to have a stern talk with your ovaries tomorrow.

Arse Scorps, tis rubbish. We're relying on Polly to administer appropriate violence.

Has been a mad busy week, finally get a day off tomorrow and TH says we should spend it gardening. I know the snow's almost gone, but still, that's not what I was thinking of..... And I seem to be showing no signs whatsoever of ovulating this month which presumably means it'll happen just as we both head away next week in different directions, making SWI impossible. Gah.

Cheers, my lovelies. I do take every supplement on earth recommended for LPD and then some. I've had terrible insomnia this month and been pretty depressed and not been as healthy-living as usual, so if nothing else, this shows that my lifestyle really affects things. It's always been like this for me - if I don't live my life like some kind of hyper-obsessive health freak then I get ill; my body is basically a perfectionist parent who punishes me if I'm not 100% perfect. Even tiny things that wouldn't even affect others in the slightest makes me feel like crap. Gah!

Gah-ism is catching!

Polly, my earliest spotting was DPO5, but they have been getting longer of late. just when I was starting to feel hopeful that my efforts were improving things, 'n' all. Please bully my lady-workings into bucking their ideas up tomorrow - but don't bellow 'HEY! SCORPETTE'S UTERUS! STOP FUCKING HER ABOUT!' in a big crowd of people.

BTW, are you going to be throwing the BESH hand signals at me so I know who you are? What are they again - miming glugging a bottle of booze, rocking a baybee, punching yourself in the womb, that sort of thing?

I shall be carrying a large jar of pickled eggs and a framed picture of a desert.

Have a great hot date you two. Should be easy enough to recognise each other. Just look of the giant ticking biological clock hanging above one another's heads.

Scorps I will not have to mime the swigging of the bottle.

Hopefully tomorrow's first date will have a wondrous effect on the wombs of ALL our BESHies.