30s TTC: The BESH Palace - where the bar never closes, booze is free, the humour is black and babydust is strictly for snorting through a rolled up 20.

[PollyPoo]

Welcome BESHies to the new palais. Plz to come fill it up plz.

For your delight and delectation I have dragged across the bar and the pit. Along with Mitchell (of course) to grant your every wish (but you will probably have to fight Scorps for him first... good luck with that).

I have even brought the Kylie infused absinthe. Now, who will join me in a Blackhole?

Thats it. I am going to book in with a needle stabber post-haste!

Why you have no t'internet Extreme? And who are these men who coming to take you away?

I now have sticks. I now have to wait 20 hours before I can use them. And it will be weird as we are staying at my folks' tonight (they're away so it won't be that weird, but still).

I'd be very happy to be a duffed twin with Polly, but not going to get too excited. Remember last cycle, that was trés disappointing.

Medee if you are late you should be able to POAS anytime I think? DO IT NOW!!! You can be my duff twin.

Polly! Yay. News of many, many, many goodness. Am all teary and pleased and happy. Needles and supplements and wooden spoon all good.

Meds POAS!

Why 20 hours? WHY 20 HOURS?!!!!!

but don't I need to do it with the first pee of the day?

Fanky lovely HumpyOne. I am getting more excited and hoping for velcro womb. I do firmly believe it is all down to the needles and the herbs - she said it could take 3 months to get fully into my system, and lo and behold, this is my 3rd cycle on da 'erbs. I luff my TCM lady very much and will have to hug her next week - she will hate it, but I'm going to do it anyway!

ExtremeDressingGownedOne yes plz to get yourself needles. And the herbs as well if you can find someone what can do it.

Not if you are late Meds - the hormones get stronger day by day and should show up on any wee. FFS just POAS woman!

also, I'm going to my best pal's tonight, who has 3 kids, and also there will be diffed-other-pal, who is about 7 months gone

really, Poo? MrM is out getting a haircut - I will wait till he gets in.

Gods teeth woman - do it now. If it is positive, shove it in his face when he gets home. If not, say nothing and POAS in the morning. Win win, see?

poll woopwooooop yaaaaay!!!!! Marvellous news luvver.

medee PISS ON THE FECKIN STICK!!!

GinnyGinGin thank you my babber So sorry about Barcelona, can you postpone it? Bastard bloody volcano.

Medee have you done it yet? I'm waiting....

Negative - bah! So, probably just an anovulatory cycle.

HUZZAH! BooTwoForPollyPoo! I am insanely happy for you! Am all teary-eyed and soppy-grinned here! As soon as you started menkulling this month I just 'knew'. I wonder if relaxing cos you were asking yourself if it was the right time was what helped? Although I like to think that the hot lesbo sex we had in that alley was the winning factor

I am also pleased on a selfish level, as you and me have had the most similar ishoos and here you are enduffulated! Has given me super-extra-mega-confidence in my Needles Lady and in my own body's ability to sort itself aaaaht with acu help And TG just sounds like a typical bloke - to me, with an Aspie Dad, that sounds positively tactful!

But so sorry to hear it was a BFN Medee Your cycles seem far too long - and must be so confusing, too. Are you seeing anyone about them? I don't mean to be a scaremonger, but 49 days is redonk and you shouldn't have to deal with that much mindfuckery. Big consoling gropes from me

Medee. Not necessarily the end of it though. Do another one tomorrow morning - temps don't usually give you biphasic chart unless you've ov'd. I didn't get +ive on first test either. Sending lot of positive vibes focussed on your wombular area.

And what Scorps said too - if it is neg tomorrow I think you should get to GP post haste and get some tests booked.

Fank you Scorpy. Well it was either the secs what I made TG do on the morning, or it was you and me in the alley that afternoon. I am glad it has given you hope and faith in the needles!

I think I 'knew' when that coffee tasted so awful on Thurs - even though I'd had a negative test that morning.

Scropes have you got appt for lap/dildocam?

27th May be the date. Have also discovered there is no-one free to cover me taking time off work on that date, but tough shit Trouble is, that's smack bang in my luteal phase, so I guess May be will a TTC no-no Am confuzzled though, cos have just been booked in for a 10-min appointment slot at the general Thursday Clinic they run (same as wot I had t'other day), which can't be right - and I ain't having some harried Doc put me under a general anaesthetic and rummage about in me tumtum whilst rushing to get it done in the shortest time possible . Will be ringing them on Monday to ascertain whaa gw'aaan. I suspect NHS foolishness.

Oh hell, not more NHS fuckwittery? When is next needling?

I really am getting out of bed now... I am due in lovely friend's hair salon soon to be de-greyed and de-birdsnested. Want pasty first though...

PollyPutTheKettleOn that is absolutely wonderful news! Hooray for diffedness. I would do some nekkid dancing but I am v v v hungover and cannot move.

Medee Bumpants to the negative, but I concur with the POAS tomorrow morning and the getting an appointment with the GP to check v long cycles.

Next needling: Wednesday. Or 'being filled with pricks', as I like to think of it

TYF wants sex at the mo, I do not. I've told him that I won't shag him until he gives me my baybee. We are at stalemate.

I've just started a thread in...gulp.... Good Housekeeping about keeping white knickers white. Please help me. I'm so ashamed.

LINK???!!! I didn't even know there was a Good Housekeeping section Oh yeah, so there is - I think my slatternly brain must have been blocking it out.

Incidentally, my Gran boils 'em (hers, not mine!). Whiter than white. Trust me. Just don't add your veg at the same time.