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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

30s TTC: The BESH Palace - where the bar never closes, booze is free, the humour is black and babydust is strictly for snorting through a rolled up 20.

1000 replies

PollyPoo · 30/03/2010 14:00

Welcome BESHies to the new palais. Plz to come fill it up plz.

For your delight and delectation I have dragged across the bar and the pit. Along with Mitchell (of course) to grant your every wish (but you will probably have to fight Scorps for him first... good luck with that).

I have even brought the Kylie infused absinthe. Now, who will join me in a Blackhole?

OP posts:
laurielou · 12/04/2010 08:19

Lots to catch up on..........

Sorry to all those who the droid has got.

gin your past 12 months never fails to make me well up. Its so, so unfair. You really deserve to win. How's you & Mooch this morning?

God, I don't really know where to start with everyone. Not really feeling very poetic this morning. Truth be told I'm still a bit hungover. So head yesterday I was most definitely not sunning slender limbs. I am a lard arse, who only managed to eat toasted buttered hot cross buns & Easter Egg, whilst smelling of alcohol & looking like a tramp. Yes, I got howling drunk on Sat, & felt (still feel) like shit. Oh, the flavoured vodka shots after 7 normal vodkas seemed such a good idea.

cho do the hot flushes ever stop? Its really pissing me off now.

Casserole · 12/04/2010 11:26

Morning hags

Well, I've given blood this morning so that's my good deed for the day over with - extra brownie points please as (a) I was so SURE 3 months ago when I booked today's appt as I left the van last time that I'd never be able to make it as would surely be updiffed and (b) I had to be asked whether tere was any chance whatsoever I could be pregnant before they'd do me.

I've made another appointment for 3 months time. Doesn't fate know I'm trying to tempt it? Come on fate, play the game...

Have banging headache now. Just swallowed some anadin extra so hoping it kicks in soon. 4 more days of revision, exam Friday. Then I might, briefly, get a bit of my life back again!

Have good days, all.

Casserole · 12/04/2010 13:40

Gah, feckit. Friend who had baby a couple of weeks ago has just put a gorgeous pic up on FB and got me all yearny. And another close friend is having her baby this weekend, too.

Courage, all. Courage.

Ariesgirl · 12/04/2010 13:42

Another week of automaton banging approaches. I must be doing it all wrong - the thought fills me with boredom. I'm only 35 for goodness sake, I sound like a 1950s housewife. Must dig out some naughty night attire.

Is banging the wrong word? Sounds violent and nasty!

Headbanger · 12/04/2010 14:09

Afternoon beehotches!

Well done cass. I've never given blood. I was exempted for years owing to glandular fever (that's my story anyway) but wonder whether I should step up to the mark....

Laurie it does cheer me that I'm not the only one that sees a glorious summer's day filled with sunshine and birdsong and thinks SHIT! Opaque tights season is over!

Aries I hear yer. And the OM is a sensitive fellow so any suspicion that I don't want it, want it madly darling now now now, etc., and he is wounded, and it simply won't be on the cards. You can do it! Break out the...the... the teddy? Or something? Do people still wear them? (The OM is immune to all but naked flesh, so this is an unexplored avenue chez Headbanger).

PollyPoo · 12/04/2010 14:33

Blimey it's quiet in here today... where is everyone?

Aries/Ed I am also suffering of SWI fatigue. I am embarrassed to admit that I dread SWI time lately. TG is also uninterested in sexy lingerie and such fripperie - if I want to get his attention I have to be nekkid.

OP posts:
laurielou · 12/04/2010 15:13

Oh 'ello! Twas wondering where you all were.

I'm in the middle of hell automaton shagging too. Like youse lot, the boyf just likes nekkid flesh. Luckily for him there's lots of that going on lately, fanks to the Clomid flushes.

So it was Fri night on, Sat off, last night on, he gets tonight off while I go to yoga. Then back on duty tomorrow. Arse, just remembered I was meant to start the POA-ovulation-S this morning. Just to cover all bases.

If I don't win this month I'm sewing my flange up & emigrating. Honestly, I've done all the right things (Clomid, folic acid, SWI), I've done all the bad things (soft cheese, pate & vodka). Is there ANYTHING else you can think of?

Bessie123 · 12/04/2010 15:25

I don't want to say the wrong thing here but from my experience (and my friends who have/have had trouble conceiving) it does work slightly better if you SWI every day rather than every other day. This is from my very unscientific survey of my rl BESH friends. I know that's not what anyone wanted to hear...

laurielou · 12/04/2010 15:38

Oh no, really bess? Lovely lady at Fertility Clinic told me every other day from the weekend onwards (when I should ovulate at some point). She said sperm hangs around for about 7 days so there should always be plenty there when I ovulate.

Last month I did SWI 3 consecutive days after surge on ovulation stick.

(Wonders who I'm trying to impress / convince???)

Bessie123 · 12/04/2010 15:50

Lorry like I said, it's a purely unscientific study. I know docs, fertility clinics, books etc say every other day, which is how the subject came up with my friends anyway - we were all saying that we had more success getting updiffed when we SWI every day rather than every other day.

Please note: I am not a medical professional.

laurielou · 12/04/2010 16:25

bess if its good enough & proven enough with your RL friends, then its good enough for me!!!

Then if I don't win this month I can blame you & not my blue-rince knackered ovaries

Bessie123 · 12/04/2010 16:43

If it helps, one of the friends was 43 when she conceived after SWI every day (following years of fertility problems, it's the only time she has got updiffed naturally). Sadly it did not result in a baybee in the end...

Good luck, can you just grin and bear it?

Ariesgirl · 12/04/2010 17:21

Every day?????

Actually my cousin who's the same age as me got diffed in three months by doing it every day. Have hardly had any since the birth, mind.

Muser · 12/04/2010 17:41

Can I counter? I had sex a handful of times on my updiffed occasions. I know they didn't work out but I definitely wasn't SWI every day during fertile period. I'm not sure we even managed every other day.

I am a bit of an anomoly though.

Muser · 12/04/2010 17:49

I mean anomaly.

Headbanger · 12/04/2010 18:08

We dunnit 2 days in a row this cycle. This is a) unheard of since our courting days in 1823, and b) prolly not going to work, since it was the only 2 days we dunnit.

I will admit that with each droid a good 10% of the hideous sinking feeling is 'Oh God, I'm going to have to sex again...'

MountTheFairy · 12/04/2010 18:54

YO hags. I personally find it easier to just do it, say 3 or 4 days in a row and not worry about every other day malarchy. I like to get it over with, so to say. How romantic. I do love my chubby hubby. But the fuckers who enjoy sex are the ones who just go "oops, I got pregnant the first time we tried. I did not think it would happen so quickly." Fuck off. Is it my competitive spirit or are these sorts of comments specifically aimed at my failure and showing off how they are better than me? I am ranting, aren't I?

Well, anyway, it's not like I've been succesfull or anything. So this month I am changing strategy. Monday Wednesday Thursday. How romantic.

Kicks to all.

ginhag · 12/04/2010 21:17

lorry how about... BUMSEX????

I have mostly got pg on the months where we practically forgot to shag. In fact mr gin has been known to say 'but that's not possible...'

yes laydees,sex with me is that memorable.

It obv makes sense that more shags=more chances,but weirdly I never get duffed if we do the lots of sex all the time thing.

Also understand all the ttc hell stuff that is being reported...I just can't do it if it isn't 'right'.... This month is def out. Tho I plan to shag A LOT in Barcelona next week it will not be ttc sex. Which will be refreshing

MountTheFairy · 12/04/2010 21:21

Mmm, Barcelona. Envious. Have one for me while you are there.

Ariesgirl · 12/04/2010 21:25

Read this everybody Does it provide inspiration or jealousy? I offer up my body for violence if the latter. I thought it was well lush anyway (aaaargh - dormant Valleys-speak surfacing!):

By capricorn76 Mon 12-Apr-10 17:49:07
"Sorry I've been missing guys. I did my first round of IUI this month and decided not to go on any fertility websites to avoid becoming obsessed again.

I'll get straight to the point, it shouldn't have worked for reasons I'll go into for a minute....but it did!!!!I got a BFP!!!due on New Years Day!!

The whole thing was farcical. The doctor I had was very unhelpful and assumed I already knew what to do. I only had one follicle of 16mm on day 10 and the doctor assumed that I'd ovulate over the weekend. She said the unit was closed on Sunday so suggested we have sex over the weekend if the OPK came up positive to avoid missing ovulation, which it did on Sat afternooon.

On Monday morning the OPK was still saying I was pre-ovulation so they told us to come in for the IUI. Unfortunately DH and I had sex 5 times between the Sat night and Monday morning (poor thing was a wreck but we were terrified we'd miss ovulation). The nurses said his sperm count was very, very low and because we'd had sex at the wrong time but we all agreed that we only needed one follicle and one sperm so decided to do the IUI anyway call it a dummy run and do it properly next time. We had sex again after as they suggested and kicked ourselves all the way home that we messed it up.

Fast forward to the day before my period, Friday. Had swollen breasts and felt a bit bloated which is how I usually am the day before. Couldn't wait for period so took a test which came back negative Some brown splodge came, all in all textbook pre-menstrual symptoms for me. I stuck a tampon on and assumed my period would come next as normal. Was a bit down about it and it was a nice day so went to the pub after work and drank more than normal. On Sat had tiny spots of blood so took that as my period starting and went to a party, again drank a few cocktails (kicking myself now). Got home removed the tampon and thee was no blood only a tiny bit of brown stuff. I knew then that something was up.

This morning I did a cheap test which had a faint line so I called the hospital and asked them what to do as I wasn't sure whether I needed to book my next IUI in. They told me to take a blood test and it came back positive!!

I'm so excited, although they said that because one of my tubes is dead a twisted and I had a couple of drops of blood I need a second test next week to make sure everythings okay which takes the shine off a little bit but for now I'm pregnant after about 16 months, operation to remove massive fibroid, only one tube, low ovarian reserve, shortish leutal phase and a IUI so shoddy even the nurses wrote it off! The odds were not on my side but I also got the first two horses on the Grand National so maybe I'm on a bit of a streak!

Funnily enough looking back now I honestly believe my acupuncturist suspected something was up on Thursday, 2 days before my period was due. She was acting quite strange.

I'll stop getting myself excited now as I know its very early days."

What a lovely thing to happen. I gather capricorn is a one-time Frolicker. Good luck to her and everyone in the world

Ariesgirl · 12/04/2010 21:29

Sorry, meant to say, if it can happen for her...etc.

Headbanger · 12/04/2010 21:52

It does provide inspiration Aries, you soppy, boss-eyed optimist you.

Nice to hear good stories - sometimes I get fearfully hippyish and think, if only I could suffuse my soul with all that's best and brightest and bonniest and most optimistic, maybe I'd get diffular success purely from goodwill!

Yeah, and you can stop your witchy cackling you lot...

Scorpette · 12/04/2010 23:38

But witchy cackling is my default setting, SheBangsTheDrum...

Talking of sexytalk, I was just chatting with TYF about how it'll soon be time to go sex-mental for TTC (droid has just finished - v short and light) and he was pretending to be confused, as though he couldn't work out what sex had to do with storks bringing babies. He then went into a whole comedy riff about being sickened by them being 'feathered fetishists', the 'beaky voyeurs of the sky' and 'airborne peeping Toms', etc., as though he thought that the storks watch us all shagging and reward the ones that turn them on the most with a baybee. So sod the sexy negligees and the like - time to hire an Orville cossie from the nearest costume shop!

BTW, he isn't into sexy undies either; just norks, of which I have a bountiful pair. See?

Am off to my initial Acupuncture consultation tomorrow at 11am, so wish me luck!

Kick Ass-stylee violence to you all and huge gropes whilst you lay round helplessly groaning in pain!

*I can actually do all that shiz. It's amazing what things you'll try in front of the mirror when you're bored enough

laurielou · 13/04/2010 08:59

Fanks for the recommendation, gin!!

have been known to partake - still no win.

Am feeling a bit shit this morning. Still fucking boiling, crap sleep & dizzy (apparently can be side affects of Clomid, or just me being a general twat). Then I saw report on TV this morning that the average age to get married is 26 & average age to have a baby is 27.

I'm screwed on all counts. By a fucking decade.

Also couldn't be arsed to SWI last night. Yoga didn't help relax me & I stomped around in a hissy fit. Dunno why.

So......have to get arse (or rather fango) in gear for tonight. Have chiropractor first, maybe I could angle some new positions. But no, we aren't meant to be enjoying this, are we? Also I've read that missionary or all fours are the best 2 positions for winning. So variety & enjoyment out the window.

Cheery fucker today, ain't I?

scorps good luck for the needles today. Do keep us posted!

Headbanger · 13/04/2010 09:17

Oh dear may I please have a belt about the face with a frozen fish?

Last cycle I had spotting exactly 6DPO (after some SWI). This is unheard of, for me: I never have any mid-cycle bleeding. I got very excited (as you may recall) and thought it was an implantation bleed. I went mental doing early tests, all of which were negatives. Then my period came - it wasn't quite as heavy as normal but it was very definitely a period.

I am now 6DPO and am spotting again. I am worried that this is setting a pattern: maybe I'm getting chemical pregnancies that aren't sticking. Surely it's too much of a coincidence that it's happening exactly the same time in the cycle?

Sorry to be ME ME ME but I am worried . I shall post this on the lovely Frolickers too and see what they say. Attention seeking? MOI?

Luck for the acupuncturist Scorpie! What fun. Lucks also for the shagging, Laurie. Who knows, maybe that will be fun too!

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