30s TTC: The BESH Palace - where the bar never closes, booze is free, the humour is black and babydust is strictly for snorting through a rolled up 20.

[PollyPoo]

Welcome BESHies to the new palais. Plz to come fill it up plz.

For your delight and delectation I have dragged across the bar and the pit. Along with Mitchell (of course) to grant your every wish (but you will probably have to fight Scorps for him first... good luck with that).

I have even brought the Kylie infused absinthe. Now, who will join me in a Blackhole?

OK... so I have taken lurking again. I hope you don't mind m'ladies - its just the risk of me-me-me moaning is high so I'm best shutting the f*ck up.

That said, had to open my gob about the following....

Aries thank-you-thank-you-thank-you for pasting Capricorn's post. You have no idea how much that has lifted my spirit. a.frickin.maz.ing.

Gin Hope you are feeling a bit better m'love. Will give you all the lovin on our date if you're still up for it. Shall I book the romantic table in the corner to avoid men you know listening in on our gynae chats again?!

Scorp V. much looking forward to hearing about the needles. Have been looking into it myself so v.interested in initial experience. Full report on your return please Loving the norks imagery btw

Thanks to all of you for your support over the mental bit. Sorry it's taken until now to say so. Was in a bit of a fug but am much better now. Aggressive matches of Mercy all round

Sorry Heads I don't know your background story so well. The only thing I can say - which is advice another BESH put to me a while back is this: Keep bothering your GP/ consultant if you are worried about something. I struggled because I didn't want to seem like a mental and I also didn't want to come across like I was questioning their vast knowledge. But in my heart I knew there was a bloody good reason why it just wasn't happening.

I went back to my consultant to clarify what the long term plan of action was and to question why I hadn't had tests that other beshes had had, which lead to a scan that day, which lead to a lucky gap in the laparoscopy list - which lead to me knowing exactly what the problem was potentialy months earlier than I might have. Obviously the outcome was far from what I would have wished, but I now have 30% more chance of conceiving than I have had for the last two years. And I no longer feel like a naggy mental obsessed woman.

Sorry if you already know all that but hey, it might be useful to someone

Also on the shagging front ...

Poor OH and I were up to "doing it" 3 times a day in our efforts to win

We hate "it" now. In fact I believe we are both secretly relieved that the next phase involves someone else putting the cell bubbles in there. A change is as good as a holiday and all that

Oh FFS, I just typed a huge fucking post and lost it all. Bah.

Lorry could it be the clomid putting you in a shitty mood? My sis said it made her feel like she had permanent PMT... not exactly conducive to SWI eh? No wonder TG is not wanting me to take it.

Streme my lovely, good to see you Hells bells, no wonder you went off it after 3 times a day! I find 3 times a week for SWI a struggle. I think it was HB that said first thought on droid arrival is 'oh hell, I have to have sex again' - I'm definitely with you on that. TTC has killed our sex life stone dead of late.

Scorpy I haz sent u txt, but you is not responding so good luck with the needles today.

So, I am clearly insane. Despite recently saying how I'm not sure I want a baybee cos I want to -run-- away move back to Cornwall and start a business etc, I am now properly 2woofling. I have made it to CD25 which would be a major celebration except that I didn't ov until CD17, so I am only 8DPO. My best month on TCM so far was 10DPO so fingers crossed. However for the last 2 days I've had really high temperatures - another day of this and will be classed as 'triphasic' and therefore a possible indicator of duffedness. I've tracked my temps for 6 months and never had a triphasic chart. I am desperately trying not to get too excited - after all, it may be an indicator that the TCM is working and my pathetic progesterone levels (what makes your temp rise) are being improved by the herbs.

FF says I can test on Thurs but I am trying to ignore that seeing as I ov'd late. Can someone just knock me out til the weekend? And if I could have a catheter put in and someone wouldn't mind testing my wee at the weekend before waking me up? Assuming of course the bleepy metal fucker hasn't arrived by then anyway. Oh I fucking hate doing this to myself every month... GAH.

run even. Twat!

oooh did someone say BUMSEX

gingin my lover I miss you - gis a snog

extremedressinggown The person I entioned before is username ThePFJ she is on annuva fred I is one and has just had tube removed I fink - in case you want to search for her posts...

Thanks Iggs

polly think my bad mood is coz boyf is a twat. So is everyone I work with. And socialise with. And am related to.....

OK, mebbe it is me & Clomid

You're right, how can this be the wonder fertility drug, when my first thought this morning was that I fancied a night alone in the spare room, & am currently trying to perfect my croaky sore throat voice to give me a reason?

I'm usually quite jolly really. Ah, fuck it. Fuck it all with bells on.

Aw Lozzer come here and let me fondle you stroke yer hair. It is not you at all, it really is every other fucker. Why can't they develop a fertility drug that turns us into wanton sex goddesses instead of bad tempered, hot, sweaty biatches? Hmm?

lorry come 'ere and let me grope you.

poohead can I haz small snog too?

Fanks for the gropes ladeez. Don't use up all my mojo though, need a smidgin (sp?) for tonight.

poo not a good advert for Clomid, am I? Mebbe if I win it'll be worth it.

Lorry, Polly is right - it's not you, it's everyone else. Just start fisticuffs with people who annoy you, burn off that energy.

Extreme it's nice to see you

I am ovulating. Feels weird not to be planning a SWI session tonight. Bad timing though. If next cycle is the same I will be fertile about a week before I'm officially allowed to shag with impunity again.

Most inconsiderate timing there Muse, why don't our bodies know how these things are supposed to work and behave themselves. Mind you, if they did that we'd all be pregnant or clutching babies by now.

I've got an important assessment type meeting for work tonight, and am desperately hoping I can get through it without bursting into tears. Trying to explain to a bunch of mainly middle aged men that it's not really them that's upset me and to blame my hormones (but without going into details of ttc) doesn't appeal. Of course it might be that they're nasty to me and deserve a wailing woman to deal with, but that's not my preferred course of action for the evening....

Hope it goes well tonight OcarinaBallerina. As I am missing a turn or two I think all the stock of luck ought to be given to other BESHes. Come along fate, time to start dishing out some rewards.

Muser, that is pure rubbish. Occie, just talk at length about periods. Middle-aged men will give you top marks just to get you to shut up Seriously though, good luck.

PoleCat, have sent you a text back now. My moby is shit and doesn't deliver texts for days then I get loads from the last few days So soz about the other ones you sent - also just got those today, my lovin' stalker

'OcarinaBallerina' is genius!

Ouch to the needles Scorps, but glad it was a positive experience. And I like the talking about periods idea, but sadly value my job too much to try it!

Scropey glad the acupuncture went well. Did it really hurt? I thought it was supposed to be painless. That's put me right off.

Scorps but I thought you said you liked me stalking you? I'm so glad the needling session went well and sorry it hurt. I think it depends who you see - the first lady I saw, I barely felt the needles. This TCM lady is brutal - she rams the needles in and then gives them a good twist/push to make sure I can feel it. Believe me, I feel them the first time well enough! I can't believe some people find it relaxing.

Right I'm off to bed to sleep do my self hypnosis CD while Boo is asleep, even though the woman's voice is very annoying and her grammer is dreadful (yes laydeez - even worse than mine). Ciao hags.

Hang on.. before I go - Scorps you do temping don't you? Will you look at my chart and tell me I'm up the pole what you think? Ta very muchly.

www.fertilityfriend.com/home/2b93a5

ahem. grammar

Poostink, I will not lie - that chart looks v promising! Triphasic indeed! I want you to be with child sooooooooooo moiche, so am declaring you uppez le duff

BTW, the mild stalking is fab, but not so much the dead crow in a heart-shaped box and the photoshopping of our faces onto hardcore lesbian porn pix. You don't need to try so hard anyway - your heart is mine

Peeps, the needles did hurt for a sec, but they were only as bad as when you nip a bit of skin when eyebrow-plucking or similar and I am a colossal lady-wimp, please bear that in mind. I have 2 little red dots on each hand where the needles were. I also had moxibustion, which is heating up herbs 'n' shiz, on my stomach, and that was weird but actually v. nice. It was actually v relaxing. The woman is lovely and was trained by Zita West herself, so have high hopes. I also saw her 20-summat son out of the window, who was a total honey, which perked up my wizened bits no end

poo that's looks a lot like my chart when the good news came...