30s TTC The Loch BESH Monsters

[CurlyCasper]

Welcome along women of a certain age. The new palace has a post modern water feature, spouting forth gin from a serious of suspicious looking humps...

I do like myself a nice French rugby boy - they do a calendar you know? I want to play "le trois b's" with Frrrrrrrrrrreddie.

I'm pre-OV right now and this morning we had proper enjoyable sex, 5 orgasms from moi fankuvehmuch - however, fast forward a week and I will be seething "I don't care, just give me what I need". Which is sexy, non?

Curly ohh laa laa I'll have a piece of him thank you very much!

Serious TTC question: what is the general consensus regarding SWI every day or every alternate day? Is there a scientific 'preferred method' or shall I just go for it three times a day? I have obviously not being doing it right for the past 10 months and I'm too scared to go trawling through the internet as I know I'll find some medical proof that I am barren and infertile and will never have my baybee.

oops, maintenant, bien sur

Frejya Every single book has a different opinion. Some say every day, some say alternate, some people time it solely to OV, others do it 5 times a day during OV. None of which guarantee a baybee. Pray to Jebus.

thanks ski I'm praying to Jebus frantically

I'm trying every second night, cause most of the time that's the most I'm capable of. Without going into too much detail I'm basically rubbish at the whole sex thing these days (in fact always).

The big O is an extreme rarity, and I seem to get a sickly fanjo v v easily, so before TTC I had pretty much lost any trace of a libido. Now that I'm back in the swing of things, have a goal to strive towards, have dug out the vibe and invested in some appropriate literature, it's improving.(bang goes not going into too much detail!)

Anyhoo, if I feel FFJ is flowing and I'm not in pain or otherwise uncomfortable in the foo foo region, I will have sex that day, regardless of whether we did it the night before. I an opportunist like that!

I will say though, the one month I did get the BFP we had sex daily from CD5 until BFP.

Is cameltoe supplying said "literature"? Quite though Casper, strike whilst the iron is hot!

Btw, can I have a quick head count - is there anyone out there trying as long as me? 11 months this week and still no baybee. I'm a nice person - honest.

Oh no, much "sterner" stuff than that ski!

I've been trying for 10 months although came off the pill 15 months, but I refuse to count those months. Only been trying properly for about 4 though. The whole 'lets just see what happens' thing did not work. I am a control freak and need to be in charge. Obviously this means I am now worried, desperate, scared it will never happen, obsessive, insane and very

On the bright side, it is Friday, which in my office means cappuccino and choc muffin frenzy

Ski, I don't want to insult you, but you are an idiot if you think you're going to get updiffed the way you're going about it. Having LOTS of sex? V REGULARLY? For FUN? And having not just one but FIVE orgasms? Are you insane? I bet all that sex has been in your foofoo, as well, hasn't it?

Don't you know you need to have endometriosis and PCOS and have sex once in your cycle, preferably on D4 or D27? Have you learnt nothing???

Not really. You're not updiffed because you're Jewish and teh baybee Jebus don't like yer.

Not really. I dunno why.... poor Skiyoghurt

Me and TYF 'enjoy' a mix of proper good sex and 'BABYNOW' OV-sex; ie fun, frolics and orgasms a-plenty as per usual throughout the month but then I get a bit panicky around OV time and even though I'm hornier than usual of course, I just want the get the spunk up there, no messing about. Is stupid, really. We do it more often during OV week; TYF is overworked and has quite a stressful and sometimes physically demanding job and he's absolutely knackered when he gets in, so we don't always do it as often as we would both like, but he makes the effort to do it loads in OV-week - so he too isn't up (hurhur) for hijinx; just a nice quickie. I ain't complaining; he's v good

Ski - am intrigued by your 5 orgasms. Can I ask, do you mean 5 within a big multiple orgasm or 5 separate times? I nearly always have one long massive one and then I am done. TMI-tastic!

Longwee - I second using 'Wimbledon Common' as a new euphemism Did a proper belly-laugh reading that!

Carrots - whoops, sorry! I was v tired when typing last night

and Curly - thank you for the hotty; might be Ovulating again after seeing that TYF looks like that nekkid, but a bit thinner, hairier and no tattoo (but after seeing that, I might be nagging him!). BRAG!

PS Sorry about your delicate flower. Can I stroke it better?

Friday profiterole day appears to have been cancelled. jailbait is getting me a burrito for lunch though.

I'm going insane by the fact that "people" are giving me knowing stares due to my age/size of arse and yet these fertility-barring issues do not seem to affect those with an IQ sub-120. {hcry}

at fridge's office ritual. I am alone today, hence the continued MN presence. (well, nobody I need to speak to will answer their phones!)

Scorps It was foofoo sex. I do indeed mean 5 seperate long ones. This morning there was the added bonus of having the dogs in the bedroom and BigDog howled in unison with me. Whilst all the time giving jailbait the "why not me?" eyes.

Must photoshop the ring off of Freddie's finger, and make an unsubtle hint to SFF, who does want another tattoo - although I have a feeling he wants his to be somewhere more visible...

Must also make sure tattoo is done just before droid arrival, so sperm donor is not out of action at the critical time. ("No you can not get a tattoo this week, I need you to be shagging me senseless, not being a cwybaybee over a little bit of self-inflicted skin damage..."

Oh ski how could you? Those poor dogs...

Curly Who are they going to tell? The other dogs down the park? "My people are always at it. Like humans they are."

Hi ski I've been trying for 14 months, had bfp in August and mc in Sept.

This was first droid since mc, I was hoping to be one of those people who become extra fertile and go from mc to baybeeeeeeeeee.

A question for those who had a mc....was your droid heavier afterwards? Mine is much heavier and much more painful.

Love the french rugby player, cheered me right up!

Woo! There is wifi on trains these days! It's like space and the future and ting.

Right. My gorgeous husband has a stupidly stressful job and we therefore have quite a stressful sex life. Would like to say yes, we're still at it like we were at the beginning of our relationship but it would be A Big Fat Lie. And we all know that lies make the ickle baby Jebus cry. I also made the mistake of involving him in the madness, which means he knows he needs to impregnate me at a certain time of the month.

Am working on an amusing compromise: in the foo-foo for 'work' and no pentration for fun sex. This went v well this month.

Excuse me, btw, but I am a renowned purveyor of filthy literature, Ms Curly. Happy to pass on some, um, samples if you wish. Alternatively, google Nancy Madore. That book made my brain bleed.

waspy funny, I thought my droid has been heavier since the mc... but that could just be because I've never been so interested in my gusset until now.

I want free samples of filth, cameltoe! Me! ME!

Actually, you've brought up a good point, linking in to what I was saying, about sex lives: everyone focuses on women's fertilititty, esp. at our age, but at 'our age', we tend to have men who have quite hectic and stressful jobs, who might not be able to shag us senseless every night - or even more than once a week. Not counting Ski's Jailbait, who can has so much free time whilst studying for his A-levels that he can be at it day and night.

When teens, thickos and chavs (or in the case of where I live, teen chav thickos) get knocked up, it's cos they're not thinking deeply about it (or indeed anything), they just think 'I'm horny; time to shag a random' and the random they shag will probably be a 'layabout' - and the horniness will be because they're ovulating, which they won't realise. If you've got nowt to do all day, shagging is a fun thing to do to pass the time - why do we have much more sex on holiday, huh?! Sorry to sound a bit Daily Heil about people, but you get my drift. We're older, we're worrying cos we know the odds, and we're worrying because we're intelligent, educated people who've made themselves knowledgeable about TTC. We're probably thinking ourselves out of a natural rhythm of sex, etc., and therefore our best chances of updiff

Dr Scorpette hath spokened.

Sorry camel I though you were "romantic" rather than filthy...

PS Camel also highlights another sex-irony: if we'd've thrown caution to the winds when we first got together, we'd all have got updiffed pretty much ASAP. We used to do it at least twice a day, every time we were together for nearly the first year (often more - he had the same job but at a much less responsible level with less hours). More like twice a week now or often less Mind you, if we'd kept up that rate I probably wouldn't have a foofoo left to shag anyway...

Oh scorps I remember well those days when SFF and I stayed in bed for 24 hours, breaking only to eat. Back when I was 21...