Very nervous to TTC after a miscarriage but am going for it

[Bella23]

For those who want to look to the future and TTC again I would really like some support, advice etc.
I thought we needed a new thread with positive energy (yes have turned into chanting hippy) so that we feel we are moving forward rather than dwelling on what has already passed.
The only thing I can concentrate on at the moment is that next Wed is the day that me and DH can start trying again (this will be 2 weeks after ERPC).
Anyone else ready to try again?

rom..i had my erpc on 30th dec and i know they said around 4 weeks but up to 6 for af to come...Im just imaptient also i was getting af type pains a few days ago and also had some spotting so assumed she was on her way

i'm sure i had my af much sooner last time -sooner than 4-6wks i mean. i think it was more like 3. i seriously hope its three this time, cause six weeks...well i'll be driving you all mad! today i feel odd and crampy.....but surely cant be O pains yet? must be 'left over' surgery pains right? sigh... i wish a dr would actually talk me thro the actual AFTER operation normalities/things fixing/how it should feel/and whys etc etc. they do so much talking about the op -which lasts what, 20minutes?- but i never saw a dr afterwards. my Gp is not the same. she is very.......'nice' but not exactly flowing with conversation. shes one of those who says 'hhhhmmm' alot. which tends to stop the conversation dead. so i rely on you guys to say 'oh yes i feel that too' what would i do without you?!
bella its you whos not waiting for af , just straight on with the trying? can i ask you lots of nosey questions about that?

DQ
i wasnt talked thru the before or after which upset me a bit, any info i got was from online. I am actually quite angry with the hospital they just sent nurse who said everything was taken and will be cremated and that you will get af in 4-6wks if you need painkillers then take them...i was like , anyways time to move on...

DQ, yes we have launched straight back into TTC so fire away with anything you want to ask.
I think my body has settled down although still get the odd random spotting (kind of dark brownish) so like you keep getting freaked out by that and wondering if it completely normal (now 16 days since ERPC) or if I am damaged!
Kind of wondering now if we should have waited at least a month before ttc just to make sure everything is ok but too late for that! Guess at the momemt there is so much going round my head that I will worry about anything at the mo!
Friday today though so things looking rosier already!

Hello!!
This is my first post and I wanted some advice/info.
My history is that I conceived by (happy) mistake last feb and gave birth at 33 weeks via emergency c section in september to a tiny but beautiful baby boy called Sam. He survived for 3 days in the neonatal unit and then died on 26th September 2004. I miss him every day.
I am now ttc again and last month did two faintly positive tests but then got af very heavily on day 37 (normally 30 - 32). I have been told that it was probably a v early mc but that there is no way of knowing. Does it matter? Should I worry?

JoseyJo, sorry to hear about Sam. I am glad that you have reached the point where you are ready to trying again. Very early miscarriages are very common indeed. As technology has changed and you can now do a preg test as early as one day past AF people are finding out they are pregnant a lot earlier and therefore people know they have had a m/c whereas years ago people would have just thought their AF was late.
As you will see from this sight, there are so many women who have had a m/c or even repeated m/cs and have gone on to have perfectly successful pregnancies. I think the best advice is to just hang in there and keep trying and hopefully people on here will keep you sane!
Welcome to the thread!

Thanks Bella. I am not sure it helps to know!! If I had more willpower then I would stop testing so early and just wait and see. Unlikely though!!

Yes exactly - no one is capable of waiting - not in our nature!!

Joseyjo, welcome to the thread, everyone is lovely.

I am very sorry to hear about Sam.

Joseyjo, I am so sorry about your little son, Sam. I know only too well the heartache of losing you little one, having lost our son Adam on the 24th September 2004. My thoughts are with you and hope all works out for you very soon.

Bella. I am also using the Boots digital thermometer pack that romilly uses. My DH gets up each morning at 6.00am so I usually just stick my arm out grab the thermometer and put it under my tongue until it beeps and then roll over for another sleep! Needless o say the first few times I did this I got the strangest looks from DH, but I think he now just humours me in all my mad plans at ttc.
We got some good news this morning as the health board we live in has bought two more cycles of IVF treatment and as we are second on the waiting list it looks like we may be offered our first cycle of treatment very soon. I'm trying not to get too exicited as I know IVF is the end of the road as far as ttc, but just hoping that it works for us.
Hope everyone is getting that Friday feeling - its the weekend! Yipee

Josey Jo - welcome to thread - sorry about sam -how awful he didnt make it at 33 weeks. Hope you find support on this thread - most of us have had pg losses and god it helps to let it all out here
dq - my GP said that cycles take 2 months to normalise after erpc - certainly last time i bled v little at start , then brownish spotting on and off, then what I thought was a light period at 3 weeks then an infection then a proper Af at about 5 weeks ,this time v different - 3 days in and heavy consistent bleeding
from what I understand, although it is possible to get pg before ist proper AF would be lucky to do so. I may 'practice' when bleeding settles but will reserve real efforts for after proper AF

joseyjo- so so sorry to hear your sad story. i really hope this is your year. you its amazing how many people have sad stories isnt it? when it happens to you you feel like the only person in the world. i wish you well ttc.
yes, well you wont believe how early i've tested in the past 10days post o is my earliest i think. got a bfp at 12days past o once you see so i never can quit trying! spend small fortune on hpts. should have got shares in them.....
i think i'm going to stick at opks for a month or so before trying the temp and full charts (done full charting before...v time comsuming!!)
bella, i have a lot of questions about not waiting for af at least once..... so will ask you them soon as i get them on paper. if you dont mind...i dont want to add to your worries tho!
i dont get friday feelings...weekends are bloody hard work with everyone home. personally i quite like mondays

Hereshopping interested to hear about your on and off brown spotting after last ERPC. I thought all had finished and then have a day of it. I have had no pain or anything so am hoping all is ok. Anyone else had this?
mmmm.....very much think my ttc efforts this month have been a bit of a waste of time to be honest. I think if I could turn back the clock I would have waited for 1st AF. So typical of me, just can't be told, always have to think I know better. Fingers crossed all will be ok though.
So DQ having just gone ahead and ttc anyway with no wait I would probably say to you that if you have the patience (which I lack and is my main downfall) I would always suggest waiting for 1st AF before ttc.

joseyjo - welcome - what a devastating thing to go through, like everyone else here i was so sad to read what you've been through. this is a great place to come to find people who understand and i'm glad you've joined us. best of luck to you (and of course everyone on here!)for the ttc'ing and happier times ahead.

hey guess what! AF today, YAYYYYYYYYY
(and that is the last time i will be celebrating getting AF from now on!) - so Mishi, hopefully any day now for you..

bella & dqueen - how many days do you do OV tests on then? and how do you know precise days without temps? do you use the EWCM?

i set my persona on CD1 today and am pathetically excited.

josey jo welcome to the thread and im glad u fele able to ttc after losing your little angel

romilly am soooooooo jealous still no signs of mine and to top it of have a horirble cold soe feeling rather self pitieous at the moment....take care

YE HA Rom - very pleased to here that AF has shown her ugly head!
Regarding ov tests - I tend to test for about 5 days. Pre m/c I was very regular 28 days so was easy to pin point. I hope this will continue once everything settles down.

Romilly - quick question
How many days after your ERPC has your AF been?

Mish - well, hopefully you are just a few days behind me (cant remember was your cycle a regular 28 days pre-m/c - cause mine was always a really short cycle if thats any indication - 24/25 days)

(bella i just scrolled down and saw you never got to grips the the EWCM so that answers that question!)

wendy - i stumbled across something about how to increase your CM if you are interested. its in that book i told you about - apparently Robitussin (yes, the cough syrup) taken a few times a day - increases it (HAS to be plain robitussin). i think some other ttc threads have stuff about robitussin too if you do a search.

Bella - 30 days later

romilly
Thanks. I have just ordered that book, so hopefully it will arrive in the next few days. A friend was also talking about it so I reckoned it had to be a good investment.

well today i have had some light brown spotting. most annoying, as llike you aid, you think youre past it and then...
bella i guess i have a weird and completely irrational feeling that my 'womb' will still be...raw? god thats an awful word.sorry, but you know...'not well' then, if i ttc now. i am nervous that if anything -god forbid- went wrong next time i would blame not waiting
i think we shall just not try very hard until after first AF, but no precautions either. see what happens.
speak to you ladies later

DQ can completely understand the idea of an ill womb..i thought the same and was convinced that i would conceive but wall of womb wouldnt be solid enough for implantation....

romilly...prior to ds i was reg 28 days had just gone back to that the 2 mths before getting pg with pip so it could go back to that or messing me around..at one point last year i was 4mths without af...very frustrating

I was also regular 28 day girl!

Today I went out and spent 20 pounds on one of those ovulation predictor tests, are these a waste of money or do they really speed things up?

Saw some other local mums and from just chatting, miscarriages seem so common and yet speaking to doctors/nurses, they seem to be clueless about what really causes it.

Hi all, I am new and in same boat as many of you. I had 13 wk u/s on Dec 8 and found bb died 2 weeks earlier on oldest dd bday. I had erpc on Dec 10 then af on Jan 10. Sonographer took lots of photos of beautiful bb. Odd that seemed to help. Still waiting for test results to see if boy or girl.

Been spotting since Jan 17, thought af was gonna come again but not. Having bad cramps and think it is ovulation pain since ewcm showed yesterday and ov test line showed up (lighter than control line). Bd with dh last night and plan to tonight. I am on cd 18 now, right? Will be nice to ttc with others having similar cycles.

OPT's seem to work great for me. No line until yesterday when othe O symptoms also arrived.

I get very sad at times but don't tell anyone, they probably won't get it - sometimes think only getting pg again will help get over this. Also I am 39 so feel like time is running low. Reading these postings helped a lot today. Maybe misery loves company thing...

Good wishes to us all!

hhi gigi
just wanted to say welcome to the board...lovely ladies who will all understand you feleing upset...obviously cos weve all been through similair
hugs to you hun
mishi